1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 AmericasCardroom.com brings poker back Million Dollar Sunday Tournament every Sunday 2 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:29,201 Okay. Happy birthday, Mom. 3 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:32,563 - Oh, is that for me? - You don't look 40, much less 50. 4 00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:35,280 Charlie, please. But thank you. I appreciate it. 5 00:00:35,480 --> 00:00:37,528 - Can I open this now? - Yes, open it. 6 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:39,762 Oh, my goodness. 7 00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:44,807 - Oh, I love it. - Do you like it? Oh, good. 8 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:46,331 It's so beautiful. 9 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:48,642 - You can exchange it. - I'm not going to. 10 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,081 - You always get me things I love. - Good. 11 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:54,449 - Sorry I'm late. - Oh, hey. Hey, isn't Lisa coming? 12 00:00:54,640 --> 00:00:56,051 No. We split up. 13 00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:59,443 Yes, I did notice your status popped up to single, yet again. 14 00:01:01,560 --> 00:01:03,927 I forgot your present. I left it in my locker. 15 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:06,970 That's okay. I hope you didn't spend too much. 16 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,970 - No, don't worry. He didn't. - Where have you been? 17 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:13,323 The ER was like a madhouse. One guy came in, six stab wounds. 18 00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:17,081 - One missed his heart by an inch. - No. Tom, it's dinnertime. Please. 19 00:01:17,280 --> 00:01:19,169 - Not yet it isn't. - Nearly. 20 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:23,160 - So, what kind of antibiotic do you...? - Mom, have you spoken to Lydia? 21 00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:27,168 She wanted to be here, but she had a really important audition. 22 00:01:27,360 --> 00:01:30,921 - What for? - A guest spot on some TV thing. 23 00:01:31,120 --> 00:01:33,726 - Something Enemy. - Maybe this'll be her big break. 24 00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:37,723 - Yeah, maybe. - Don't hold your breath. 25 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:39,926 Stop it. 26 00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:44,131 You guys must have been something growing up. Dolls with heads cut off. 27 00:01:44,320 --> 00:01:46,402 No, my sister and I were very close. 28 00:01:46,600 --> 00:01:49,490 Oh, no. I'm sorry, I was talking about Anna and Lydia. 29 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,481 My goodness. I don't know why I said that. 30 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,763 We're here to celebrate you, Mom. Dad, what about a toast? 31 00:01:55,960 --> 00:01:57,405 Dad! 32 00:01:57,600 --> 00:01:59,250 Toast. 33 00:01:59,640 --> 00:02:01,130 Yes, yes, yes. 34 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:05,564 To the most beautiful and the most intelligent woman... 35 00:02:05,760 --> 00:02:09,367 - ...I have known in my entire life. - Thank you. 36 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:11,968 - Happy birthday. - Cheers! Happy birthday! 37 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:13,525 - We love you. - I love you. 38 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:15,165 - Cheers. - Cheers, darling. 39 00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:25,930 My name is Frederick Johnson. 40 00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:29,164 I'm associate professor of cognitive science here at UCLA. 41 00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:32,648 I'm here to welcome our speaker who just flew in from New York. 42 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:36,362 Now, in my dissertation, I spent about a chapter and a half... 43 00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:40,565 vituperatively citing today's guest and saying why she was wrong. 44 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:46,805 For the record, every time that Alice and I have argued, she was right. 45 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:50,243 Alice Howland is the Lillian Young Professor of Linguistics... 46 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:54,087 at Columbia University. She famously wrote her seminal textbook... 47 00:02:54,280 --> 00:02:56,886 From Neurons to Nouns, while raising three children. 48 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:59,811 I'm sure getting more than a few "A-ha" moments from them. 49 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:03,163 And it is now considered one of the cornerstones... 50 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:05,840 of linguistics education all over the world. 51 00:03:06,080 --> 00:03:10,210 Please welcome Dr. Alice Howland. 52 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:16,641 Thank you so much. 53 00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:21,765 Most children speak and understand their mother tongue... 54 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:25,203 before the age of 4, without lessons, homework... 55 00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:27,323 or much in the way of feedback. 56 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:29,369 How do they accomplish this feat? 57 00:03:29,920 --> 00:03:34,323 This is a question that has interested scientists at least since Charles Darwin... 58 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:37,848 kept a diary of the early language of his infant son. 59 00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:41,283 He observed, "Man has an instinctive tendency to speak... 60 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:44,290 as we see in the babble of young children." 61 00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:46,529 Much has been learned since then. 62 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:50,691 But today I'd like to focus on some recent studies from my lab... 63 00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:54,601 on the acquisition of past-tense irregular verb forms in children... 64 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,883 between the ages of 18 months and two and a half years. 65 00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:00,162 Now, you may say that this falls... 66 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:03,364 into the academic tradition of knowing more and more... 67 00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:07,087 about less and less until we know everything about nothing. 68 00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:10,648 But I hope to convince you that by observing these baby steps... 69 00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:12,524 into the... 70 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,450 Into... 71 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:23,728 I... I knew I shouldn't have had that champagne. 72 00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:30,482 Into the word stock of a given language... 73 00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:32,808 we will learn crucial information... 74 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:36,123 about the relationship between memory and computation... 75 00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:40,564 that is the very essence of communication. 76 00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:49,288 Lexicon. 77 00:05:23,840 --> 00:05:25,922 I have that same thought. Makes sense. 78 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,646 - I saw it. - Yeah, I thought about that. 79 00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:37,364 Okay. I'm gonna go down and get Shel. I'll be right back. 80 00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:40,887 - Hey. - Hi. 81 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:42,445 Hey, no, I'm sorry. 82 00:05:42,640 --> 00:05:44,642 You just caught me by surprise. 83 00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:46,126 Come on in. It's... 84 00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:50,285 It's messy, but, you know, I was in the process of cleaning. 85 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,084 It's fine, honey. Don't worry. 86 00:05:52,280 --> 00:05:55,841 The boys are total slobs. The kitchen is the main battleground... 87 00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:59,448 but I've got them in training, so we'll see how that goes. 88 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:02,924 - So where are they? - Working. 89 00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:06,006 Doug's at Starbucks, Malcolm does some catering. 90 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,965 I guess that's what they mean by working actor, huh? 91 00:06:10,840 --> 00:06:14,561 - You involved with either one of them? - Doug's gay. 92 00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:18,731 And Malcolm and I did have a thing, but it's over. 93 00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:22,164 He got me in with Open Space. 94 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:25,324 - It's, like, the best theater company. - Yes, I heard. 95 00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:29,730 Oh, thank you. Yeah, I'm done. 96 00:06:31,640 --> 00:06:34,928 It would have been awesome if you saw No Exit. 97 00:06:35,280 --> 00:06:39,001 - Daddy said you were good. - I was all right. It wasn't my best night... 98 00:06:39,200 --> 00:06:42,363 but at least he could get, you know, like, a sense of it. 99 00:06:42,920 --> 00:06:45,002 Figure out why he's doing... 100 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:47,841 you know, me a solid with the company. 101 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:49,769 What do you mean? 102 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:54,365 - It's really nice of him to help out. - How is he helping with the company? 103 00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:57,331 It's our responsibility as members to raise equity... 104 00:06:57,560 --> 00:07:00,689 for the productions we put on. Eventually we get a cut... 105 00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:03,531 of the box office. We're sort of shareholders. 106 00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:05,802 So basically you have to pay to act? 107 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:07,650 No. 108 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:12,563 It's a theater group. It's just the reality of the situation. 109 00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:14,728 That's how it is. It's Los Angeles. 110 00:07:14,920 --> 00:07:17,526 Don't you think it's time you reconsidered things? 111 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:21,441 You're so smart. There's much more you could be doing with your life. 112 00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:24,371 - Like going to college? - Yes. Yes. Like college. 113 00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:28,690 Like we've never talked about that before. Every single day of my life. 114 00:07:29,680 --> 00:07:33,446 I figured out what I wanted to do, and I'm doing it. It's a good thing. 115 00:07:33,680 --> 00:07:36,650 - But on whose dime? - You're helping Tom with med school. 116 00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:41,368 - You helped Anna with law school. - Sweetheart, those are real careers. 117 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:43,887 I just don't want you to limit your choices. 118 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:47,605 - You want to make my choices. - No, I don't. 119 00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:52,731 I'm really happy. 120 00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:56,242 I'm sorry. I don't... 121 00:07:57,280 --> 00:07:59,487 I don't wanna argue about this. 122 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:02,963 - Just forget I said anything, okay? - It's forgotten. 123 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,841 - Gonna check your phone? - It's just a game. 124 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:10,089 Your sister and I have an obsession with "Words with Friends." 125 00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:12,760 - That's cute. - You don't wanna play with her... 126 00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:15,645 - ...she's a demon. - I'm not surprised. 127 00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:39,203 John? 128 00:08:42,560 --> 00:08:44,369 Hi. 129 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:51,444 John? 130 00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:48,570 Want one? Here you go. 131 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,606 Two for one at the Shoe Warehouse. 132 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,565 Two for one, Shoe Warehouse. 133 00:09:55,480 --> 00:09:57,960 Two for one at the Shoe Warehouse. 134 00:10:46,120 --> 00:10:49,602 So... I don't know. That's all he said. 135 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:54,564 Two for one at the Shoe Warehouse. Here you go. 136 00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:03,123 - One? - No, thanks. 137 00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:05,604 Ali? 138 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:10,803 - I was wondering where you were. - Don't. I'm really sweaty. 139 00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:13,602 - How did it go? - What? 140 00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:16,531 - UCLA. - Oh, it was good. 141 00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:17,846 They were... 142 00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:21,328 - They were really receptive. - I'm sure they were. 143 00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:23,682 How was Lydia? 144 00:11:23,880 --> 00:11:26,486 Good. You know. 145 00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:29,448 You guys argue? 146 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:34,767 Well, we spent the whole evening trying not to. 147 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:40,922 The news that you're bankrolling her theater company didn't help. 148 00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:43,088 I told you about that. 149 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:45,521 - You didn't. - I thought I did. 150 00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,566 - You didn't. - You're not gonna like this either... 151 00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:50,762 but I have things to do at the lab. 152 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:54,931 - Maybe walk me over there right now? - No, I don't wanna go back to campus. 153 00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:58,681 I just went for a run. I really need to be home right now. 154 00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:03,444 - Are you okay? - Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. I just... 155 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,927 You said we were gonna spend the evening in. 156 00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:09,289 I did. We will. The sooner I go, the sooner I'll be back... 157 00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:12,051 and we can watch a movie. 158 00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:15,325 I'm sorry. I'm just exhausted. 159 00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:18,843 Get some rest. 160 00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:20,964 Relax. 161 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:33,964 I've started forgetting things, little annoying things... 162 00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:35,605 like words and names. 163 00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:38,406 And I got lost, completely lost... 164 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:39,726 running on campus. 165 00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:42,526 I talked to my doctor, she said it could be menopause. 166 00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:44,768 Last time I'd had a period was February. 167 00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:47,804 But I had one again, in September, before my birthday. 168 00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:51,163 Are you taking any pills, medication, supplements? 169 00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:55,445 I take a multivitamin, flaxseed oil, calcium, iron. 170 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:58,246 I occasionally take a sleeping pill when I travel. 171 00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,284 - Have you had any head injuries? - No. 172 00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:06,130 Would you consider yourself depressed or under undue stress at the moment? 173 00:13:06,320 --> 00:13:08,607 No. I work a lot, but I thrive on it. 174 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:12,122 - How's your sleeping? - It's fine. Like, seven hours a night. 175 00:13:12,320 --> 00:13:15,324 Now, I'm gonna ask you to remember a name and an address. 176 00:13:15,560 --> 00:13:17,881 - I'm gonna ask you for it again later. - Okay. 177 00:13:18,080 --> 00:13:21,971 John Black, 42 Washington Street, Hoboken. 178 00:13:22,160 --> 00:13:24,401 - Can you repeat that for me? - John Black... 179 00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:26,887 42 Washington Street, Hoboken. 180 00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:29,606 - Good. How old are you? - I'm 50. 181 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:31,882 - What's today's date? - November 26. 182 00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:34,282 - Where are we? - We are on the third floor... 183 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:36,005 of New York-Presbyterian. 184 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:37,770 Can you spell "water" for me? 185 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:39,764 W-A-T-E-R. 186 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:43,766 - Now can you spell it for me backwards? - R-E-T-A-W. 187 00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:46,770 Can you tell me what you see on these cards? 188 00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:48,291 Pliers. 189 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:50,323 A ladder. 190 00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:52,443 A sea horse. 191 00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:54,603 A screwdriver. 192 00:13:54,880 --> 00:13:56,723 An elephant. 193 00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:01,007 - Tell me about your parents. - Well, they're both dead. 194 00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:04,966 My mother and my sister died in a car crash when I was 18... 195 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:08,289 and my father died in 1999 of liver failure. 196 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:10,528 - Hepatitis? - Cirrhosis. 197 00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:12,131 He was an alcoholic. 198 00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:15,051 And what was he like towards the end? 199 00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:18,323 Incoherent. Incontinent. 200 00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:21,000 We didn't really see a lot of each other. 201 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:25,171 He lived in New Hampshire, and we weren't that close. 202 00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:26,930 Sorry. 203 00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:31,563 - Do you have any other siblings? - No. I only had the one. 204 00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:35,805 Now, can you tell me that name and address that I asked you to remember? 205 00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:38,285 John Black. 206 00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:40,568 And the address? 207 00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:45,484 Damn it, I forgot. 208 00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:47,569 Was it 42 Argyle Street... 209 00:14:47,760 --> 00:14:51,890 Cole Street, Washington Street, or South Street? 210 00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:57,288 I was distracted talking about my parents. Can we do that again? 211 00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:59,960 - There's no need to at this time. - Okay. 212 00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:03,643 So I'd like to do an MRI, just to rule some things out. 213 00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:05,120 Like what? 214 00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:07,800 Because I think I have a brain tumor. 215 00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:11,607 A precaution. But it will allow us to see if there are any lesions... 216 00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:15,970 or any signs of a stroke. Just find out what is going on in there. 217 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:20,763 Okay. What should I do in the meantime? 218 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:24,482 Get plenty of exercise. It's always good to get the blood pumping. 219 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:25,806 Drink lots of water. 220 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,207 Good hydration is excellent for the memory. 221 00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:32,161 Next time you come and see me, bring in someone who knows you well? 222 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:35,523 Your husband or a close relative? 223 00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:37,765 Sure. 224 00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:16,204 Stethoscope... 225 00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:17,765 millennium... 226 00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:19,724 hedgehog. 227 00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:23,771 Okay. 228 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,570 Okay. 229 00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:29,649 Cathode. 230 00:16:32,560 --> 00:16:36,645 Pomegranate. 231 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:39,643 Trellis. 232 00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:42,365 Okay. 233 00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:50,804 Hello. 234 00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,161 Hi. Come on in. 235 00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:54,004 - Hey, Mom. Hi. - Hey, hi. 236 00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:55,446 Good to see you. 237 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:57,642 - This is Jenny. - Hello. I'm Alice. 238 00:16:57,840 --> 00:16:59,968 - I'm happy you could join us. - Thank you. 239 00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:02,487 Of course. Sweetheart, why don't you guys... 240 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:05,206 go in there and get a drink, and grab the...? 241 00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:07,607 The cheese thing and... 242 00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:08,881 - All right. - Yeah. 243 00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:10,844 I'm so happy you could join us. 244 00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:12,963 - I really am, Jenny. - Thank you. 245 00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:15,242 - It smells so good in here. - Beautiful. 246 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:18,046 - Yeah. - That's how we do it. 247 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:22,204 Okay. 248 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,082 How many goddamn eggs? 249 00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:34,370 Cathode, pomegranate... 250 00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:36,608 trellis? 251 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,002 - Hey, Mom. - Hi. 252 00:17:39,240 --> 00:17:41,322 - Merry Christmas. - Oh, merry Christmas. 253 00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:43,045 How was your flight? 254 00:17:43,240 --> 00:17:46,642 Actually, awful. This guy coughed all over me the entire time. 255 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:48,888 - I hope you don't get sick. - Me too. 256 00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:51,367 - Does this mean what I think it means? - Yes. 257 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:53,164 - Bread pudding? - Your favorite. 258 00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:55,203 - Yes. - Mom! Merry Christmas. 259 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:56,731 - Hi. - Hello. 260 00:17:56,920 --> 00:18:00,049 - Seen my latest "Words with Friends"? - I haven't had time. 261 00:18:00,240 --> 00:18:01,366 - A real zinger. - Yeah? 262 00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:03,284 - "Jealousy" on a triple. - Hey! 263 00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:05,926 - Don't spoil it. - Already trending on Twitter. 264 00:18:06,120 --> 00:18:07,451 How's California? 265 00:18:07,640 --> 00:18:08,687 - Nice. - Yeah? 266 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:10,166 Warmer than here? 267 00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:13,324 Yes. Definitely warmer than here. 268 00:18:13,800 --> 00:18:17,122 Hey, guys, why don't you get out of here... 269 00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:19,408 so I can concentrate on making this. 270 00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:21,280 Okay? 271 00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:23,687 - Where's Dad? - He's upstairs. 272 00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:24,927 Can I help you? 273 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:27,322 No, I'm fine. Go get a drink or something. 274 00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:30,729 - It's gonna be delicious. Yum. It will be. - Oh, I hope so. 275 00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:32,325 I can't wait. 276 00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:33,885 - Jenny. - Nice to meet you. 277 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:36,082 Nice to meet you too. 278 00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:38,810 - Hi, Jenny. - How are you? 279 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,809 I am fine. 280 00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,240 Honestly. 281 00:18:42,440 --> 00:18:44,329 - Hey. - Slider. 282 00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:50,521 It's a very big decision. We're excited. 283 00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:52,882 The place was recommended by friends... 284 00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:57,404 who've been trying for years, and they just had their first child, so... 285 00:18:57,600 --> 00:18:58,806 So we'll see. 286 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:01,526 - I've heard good things about Wellspring. - Good. 287 00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:04,485 It's expensive, but we obviously want it to work. 288 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:06,444 You could be a mom already. 289 00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:07,846 I know. 290 00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:09,411 - Okay. - Are you kidding? 291 00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:12,729 - What kind of soup, Mom? - Here we go. It's butternut squash. 292 00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:15,804 Hi, I'm Alice. I'm so happy you could join us. 293 00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:20,250 - I'm Jenny. - It's really nice to meet you. 294 00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:22,568 - Yeah... - Well, I think... 295 00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:25,485 I deserve a glass of wine after that, don't you? 296 00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:27,768 - You want white? - Yes. Thank you. 297 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:30,088 - Does everyone have a glass? - Yes, we do. 298 00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:34,285 Let's have a toast. To Christmas. 299 00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:36,329 - Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas. 300 00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:39,171 - Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas. 301 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:41,846 Now, I don't see anything abnormal in your MRI. 302 00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:44,361 No cerebral vascular disease... 303 00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:47,291 - ...no evidence of strokes, no masses. - Thank God. 304 00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:50,211 And your blood work came back completely clear... 305 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:54,769 but what worries me are the memory tests that I sent you for. 306 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:59,244 You have sporadic memory impairment totally out of proportion to your age. 307 00:19:59,440 --> 00:20:03,923 And there is evidence of decline in your level of mental function. 308 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,124 I think we should do a PET scan. It's similar to an MRI... 309 00:20:07,320 --> 00:20:09,687 but it can pick up things at the molecular level. 310 00:20:09,880 --> 00:20:14,010 I know what a PET scan is, but what in particular would you be looking for? 311 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:19,408 I wanna see if the results are consistent with Alzheimer's disease. 312 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:22,922 Now, it would be rare for someone as young as yourself... 313 00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:26,363 but you do fit the criteria. 314 00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:30,686 Last time, I asked you to bring a close relative. 315 00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:33,281 I really didn't think that would be necessary. 316 00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:36,245 Okay. But next time, for sure. 317 00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:37,885 Okay? 318 00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:41,851 "Enhancement of endogenous levels of endorphin... 319 00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:45,123 has not been shown to reduce incidence of metastasis... 320 00:20:45,320 --> 00:20:47,084 in the distant cell sites." 321 00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:49,681 - That's not good. - Tell me about it. 322 00:20:49,880 --> 00:20:52,087 We've been working on this for months. 323 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:55,170 It seems beta endorphin doesn't significantly impact... 324 00:20:55,360 --> 00:20:57,647 the microphage activity. 325 00:20:57,960 --> 00:21:00,042 How about the cytokines? 326 00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:02,971 Elevated. Slightly. 327 00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,560 Oh, God. Back to square one. 328 00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:13,046 Are we both here on the 17th? 329 00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:15,405 I don't remember. 330 00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:19,685 Phil and Diane were saying they might come to town for the weekend. 331 00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:28,291 How long are you going to keep at that thing? 332 00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:30,528 Till it's clean. 333 00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:28,330 John? 334 00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:32,847 John, sweetheart, wake up. 335 00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:40,328 - What time is it? - I need to talk to you. 336 00:22:42,360 --> 00:22:43,930 I've... 337 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:47,446 I've got something wrong with me. 338 00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:51,643 What are you talking about? 339 00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:54,605 I've been seeing a neurologist. 340 00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:57,606 You've been seeing a neurologist? Why? 341 00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:01,850 They think that it might be early onset Alzheimer's disease. 342 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,650 Ali, Ali, that doesn't make any sense at all. 343 00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:09,763 They don't know anything for sure. 344 00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:12,964 But I've been doing all these tests and I'm really scared. 345 00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:17,922 - Ali, that is completely insane. - I got... 346 00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:21,687 I got lost while I was running on campus a while ago. I can't... 347 00:23:21,920 --> 00:23:26,130 I can't remember appointments, words. 348 00:23:26,320 --> 00:23:28,288 Honey, we all have memory lapses. 349 00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:31,006 That's a sign of getting older. The other day... 350 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,283 I couldn't remember the word "glucose." 351 00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:35,641 It's not like that. 352 00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:38,923 It's like something just drop... Drops out under me. 353 00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,208 - But there is no diagnosis yet? - No. 354 00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:46,445 Okay. Well, then I think that this is ridiculous. It's complete bullshit. 355 00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:49,883 - You don't have Alzheimer's. - Why won't you take me seriously? 356 00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:51,525 I know what I'm feeling. 357 00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:55,441 I know what it's feeling, and it feels like my brain is fucking dying. 358 00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:59,361 And everything I've worked for in my entire life is going. 359 00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:01,130 It's all... All going. 360 00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:02,845 No. 361 00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:05,521 Come here. 362 00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:09,209 Don't cry. 363 00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:23,168 Most of them are still awaiting trial. 364 00:24:23,360 --> 00:24:25,931 They have not been found guilty. 365 00:24:26,120 --> 00:24:29,806 Last year, officials at Rikers reported to the Board of Corrections... 366 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:33,482 - ...that on a typical day... - What time is your tutorial? 367 00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:35,364 Eleven. 368 00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:37,722 Well, that gives you some time. 369 00:24:39,520 --> 00:24:43,684 I'm gonna be a little late because I have a departmental meeting. 370 00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:46,724 When I come back, we can go to dinner, have Thai food? 371 00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:48,405 Yeah, okay. 372 00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:54,161 I'm okay. I just... 373 00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:58,490 Last night just got the better of me, that's all. 374 00:24:58,720 --> 00:25:03,009 Well, two things: I think it's way too early to jump to any conclusions... 375 00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:07,887 and whatever happens, I'm here. 376 00:25:09,920 --> 00:25:12,321 You can clearly see in here... 377 00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:16,366 The red areas are high in beta-amyloid. 378 00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:20,486 The buildup has probably been ongoing for several years. 379 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:23,006 I'm sorry. 380 00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:26,765 There is evidence of high amyloid in older people... 381 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,241 with normal cognitive function, correct? 382 00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:32,884 Yes, but not in someone as young as Alice. 383 00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:35,847 Well, at least it would be extremely rare. 384 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:39,487 High amyloid is associated with conditions other than Alzheimer's. 385 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:41,848 Unfortunately, in Alice's case... 386 00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:45,522 this corroborates the clinical symptoms that she is presenting. 387 00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:48,724 Shouldn't any diagnosis be accompanied by a genetic test? 388 00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:52,402 - Hold on a minute, please. - Actually, I was gonna suggest that. 389 00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:55,524 In a case like this, with the onset being so early... 390 00:25:55,720 --> 00:26:00,442 we would like to check for presenilin mutations that would be an indicator... 391 00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:04,804 of familial Alzheimer's disease, which is a rarer form. 392 00:26:05,040 --> 00:26:06,849 We can make an appointment for you. 393 00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:10,721 - So this concerns my children? - Yes. 394 00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:14,328 I assume that if I have the gene... 395 00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:17,364 the odds of my passing it along are fifty-fifty. 396 00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:18,800 I'm afraid so. 397 00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:23,449 And if they are carriers, what are the odds of them developing the disease? 398 00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,331 I'm afraid it's a hundred percent. 399 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:31,529 Radiology technician, please dial extension to 256. 400 00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:36,411 The kids will all be here for our anniversary. 401 00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:39,365 I don't think we should tell them, not until we have the results. 402 00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:43,326 We will by then, if I go in next week. I wanna know as soon as possible. 403 00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:47,684 Where the hell is this goddamn elevator? Here we are in a major hospital. 404 00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:49,962 - Only one elevator running? - It's okay. 405 00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:53,881 - We could've taken the stairs by now. - It doesn't matter. 406 00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:58,208 Going down. 407 00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:10,841 Well, everybody... 408 00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:12,405 What's going on? 409 00:27:15,720 --> 00:27:18,803 - Oh, boy. - Are you guys gonna break up or...? 410 00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:20,764 No. 411 00:27:21,720 --> 00:27:26,601 - No, it's nothing like that. It... - Mom, are you sick? 412 00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:34,483 I have been seeing a neurologist for the past few months... 413 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:37,968 and I have Alzheimer's disease. 414 00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:39,850 Early onset. 415 00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:42,930 That... That doesn't make sense. Are...? Are you sure? 416 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:45,851 There is no doubt. She has the disease. 417 00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:48,122 But at her age, it's... 418 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:50,322 It is rare, but it has been confirmed. 419 00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:52,562 - Yeah. - You're so young, Mom. 420 00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:59,570 - I don't understand that. - I had noticed one or two things. 421 00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:02,570 You didn't know Tom's girlfriend when she came over... 422 00:28:02,760 --> 00:28:05,491 - Lydia. - What medications are you on? 423 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:08,126 Right now, I'm on Aricept and Namenda. 424 00:28:08,320 --> 00:28:10,004 They can help slow the progress? 425 00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:12,009 - Well, no. - I'm afraid not. 426 00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:13,929 Help alleviate the symptoms... 427 00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:17,090 - ...but they can't prevent the disease. - The thing is... 428 00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:20,204 that the type of Alzheimer's I have... 429 00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:23,927 is very rare. 430 00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:30,131 - It's familial. It's passed on genetically. - Oh, my God. 431 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:32,687 We believe that she got it from her father... 432 00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:36,043 and of course, we're very worried about the three of you. 433 00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:38,322 Now, there is a test you can take... 434 00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:43,287 but it's completely up to you whether you wanna find out or not. 435 00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:46,209 I'm sorry. 436 00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:49,329 I'm so... 437 00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:49,490 Can anyone tell me what it says in the syllabus for today? 438 00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:52,841 Phonology. 439 00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:56,522 And can anyone tell me what phonology is? 440 00:30:02,720 --> 00:30:06,611 "Phono" is from the Greek word "phoné," meaning "sound"... 441 00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:11,283 and phonology, broadly speaking, is the study of the sounds of language. 442 00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:13,801 It should be distinguished from phonetics... 443 00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:28,764 Hi, Anna. 444 00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:30,291 Hi, Mom. 445 00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:32,482 Are you okay? 446 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:36,288 I got the results. I'm positive. 447 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:39,842 Oh, God, Anna. 448 00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:43,323 I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. 449 00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:47,730 Tom turned out negative, and Lydia didn't wanna know. 450 00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:49,365 But I'm positive. 451 00:30:49,560 --> 00:30:51,961 Baby, how are you feeling? 452 00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:54,203 I'm okay. 453 00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:59,964 One good thing, at least I found out now before the next IUI session. 454 00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,083 I guess they can test the embryos... 455 00:31:02,280 --> 00:31:04,806 so they can be sure the babies will be okay. 456 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:09,130 I'm on my way to a lecture, but I can cancel it and I can be right there. 457 00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:13,120 No, no, Mom, it's okay. I'm with Charlie. I'm okay. 458 00:31:13,320 --> 00:31:17,086 No, I want to. I can... I... I want to be there. I can come. 459 00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:21,251 No, please don't worry. I'll be fine. 460 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,530 Okay. 461 00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:26,607 I love you, sweetheart. 462 00:31:26,920 --> 00:31:28,729 I love you. 463 00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:32,849 - Bye. - Bye. 464 00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:17,010 "I had been looking forward to this course, but I was disappointed. 465 00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:22,565 The content was often muddled and delivered with little focus or care. 466 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:27,045 Class was a waste of time. I ended up just following the online version. 467 00:32:27,240 --> 00:32:30,164 I found Linguistics 201 very erratic. 468 00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:34,160 I had a hard time following Dr. Howland's lectures. 469 00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:36,886 Even she seems like she gets lost in them." 470 00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:43,008 Eric, I am so sorry. I... I didn't know the students felt this way. 471 00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:47,762 Obviously, I will... I will make adjustments and we can reevaluate my performance. 472 00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:50,645 Everything all right at home? Between you and John? 473 00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:53,969 - Yes, everything's fine. - Is it something we can help with? 474 00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:55,964 - Stress, depression? - No, no, no. 475 00:32:56,200 --> 00:32:58,646 - Substance abuse? Alcohol? - No. No. God, Eric. 476 00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:01,605 No, it's... It's nothing like that. I... it's... 477 00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:06,169 It's medical. It's a... It's a medical issue... 478 00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:10,081 and I admit I had a hard time teaching last semester... 479 00:33:10,280 --> 00:33:12,647 and I wasn't aware of how much it showed. 480 00:33:12,880 --> 00:33:15,690 Alice, I'm not following. 481 00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:20,247 I have mild cognitive impairment. 482 00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:22,647 Would you unpack that for me? 483 00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:26,686 In February, I was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's disease. 484 00:33:27,560 --> 00:33:29,244 What? 485 00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:33,565 - Alice, oh, my God, I'm sorry. - It's early. It's still early stages. 486 00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:36,206 It will limit my ability as time goes on... 487 00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:39,643 - but for now, I feel capable... - There's no need to... 488 00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:43,162 I mean, we don't want you under any undue stress. 489 00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:46,443 - That would be counterproductive. - I can handle the stress. 490 00:33:46,640 --> 00:33:51,282 I would like to remain in the department for as long as we all think is possible. 491 00:33:53,520 --> 00:33:57,366 Well, I'll have to let the department and the faculty know. 492 00:33:58,560 --> 00:33:59,721 Yes, of course. 493 00:33:59,920 --> 00:34:02,730 I am so, so sorry. 494 00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:53,491 I'll have a regular with blueberries and coconut, please. 495 00:35:08,240 --> 00:35:09,480 Hi. 496 00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:12,727 Alice, where the hell were you? 497 00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:14,121 I went for a run. 498 00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:17,051 You've been gone for over two hours. I was worried. 499 00:35:17,240 --> 00:35:19,049 Well, then I went to Pinkberry. 500 00:35:19,240 --> 00:35:21,811 - You went to Pinkberry? - Yeah. 501 00:35:22,160 --> 00:35:26,688 Well, I hope you enjoyed that because you completely blew our dinner plans. 502 00:35:27,840 --> 00:35:30,047 Susan Kirby and her husband. 503 00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:35,081 I'm sorry. I forgot. 504 00:35:35,680 --> 00:35:37,728 I have Alzheimer's. 505 00:35:37,920 --> 00:35:39,524 I texted you, I e-mailed you. 506 00:35:39,720 --> 00:35:42,291 - There are ways to manage... - I said I was sorry. 507 00:35:42,480 --> 00:35:44,960 She's the chair of my department. 508 00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:47,885 I had no idea where you were, if something happened. 509 00:35:48,120 --> 00:35:51,283 - Why didn't you bring your phone? - I can't when I'm running. 510 00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:53,801 Wear a fanny pack. Is it that inhibiting? 511 00:35:54,040 --> 00:35:55,530 Yes. 512 00:35:59,920 --> 00:36:03,811 - I hate that this is happening to me. - I hate it too. 513 00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:07,684 We have to keep the important things in our life going. 514 00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:10,087 We have to try or we're going to go crazy. 515 00:36:10,280 --> 00:36:11,691 I know. I know, John. 516 00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:15,965 I am, I'm sorry, but I don't know what I would've been like at a dinner party. 517 00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:19,562 I might not be able to remember names or answer simple questions. 518 00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:22,764 - Never mind get through an anecdote. - You're doing great. 519 00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:24,166 Relative to what? 520 00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:30,001 I wish I had cancer. 521 00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:32,286 Don't say that. 522 00:36:32,480 --> 00:36:35,609 No, I do. I mean it. I mean, I wouldn't feel so ashamed. 523 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:38,690 People have cancer, they wear pink ribbons for you... 524 00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:43,005 and go on long walks, and raise money... 525 00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:47,967 and you don't have to feel like some kind of a social... 526 00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:52,488 I can't remember the word. 527 00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:07,003 In 2013, we completed exterior repairs, and inside, we replaced the elevators... 528 00:37:07,240 --> 00:37:10,403 refurbished the auditorium, the library and lounge area... 529 00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:13,524 - ...and upgraded our HVAC system. - Well, that's good. 530 00:37:13,720 --> 00:37:16,326 We also took away a lot of the old security doors. 531 00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,682 Residents are issued a bracelet instead... 532 00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:23,721 which keeps them from using elevators or leaving the building, depending on their level. 533 00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:26,207 I don't know if you've experienced this with your parent... 534 00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:29,643 but they get nighttime restlessness and wandering. 535 00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:33,845 We can prevent their elopement without patients feeling they're locked in. 536 00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:35,087 I see. 537 00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:39,808 We saw that large group activities left most of the residents unengaged... 538 00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:44,324 and even distressed by the confusion they experienced from all the stimulation. 539 00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:46,761 So we redefined activities... 540 00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:51,010 to include all interactions between staff and residents in the unit. 541 00:37:51,240 --> 00:37:55,325 Staff looks for opportunities to make meaningful connections with residents... 542 00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:59,969 starting with knowing about the person and what makes them comfortable. 543 00:38:00,160 --> 00:38:05,200 One woman who had worked as a nurse sat, most days, in the nursing station, writing notes. 544 00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:06,447 Heartbreaking. 545 00:38:06,680 --> 00:38:09,684 Yes, but it's a behavior we see time and again. 546 00:38:09,880 --> 00:38:12,201 We don't have restrictions on visiting times. 547 00:38:12,400 --> 00:38:14,721 Family and friends are welcome day or night. 548 00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:18,242 - Doesn't look like anybody's here. - Sunday is the day they come. 549 00:38:18,480 --> 00:38:19,925 - What's that? - Chair alarm. 550 00:38:20,120 --> 00:38:22,487 Certain residents have them so we know they're up. 551 00:38:22,680 --> 00:38:25,081 - She all right? - Just a precautionary measure. 552 00:38:25,320 --> 00:38:27,926 - Get me to Penn Station. - It's all women. 553 00:38:28,120 --> 00:38:31,283 We do have mainly female residents here, but there are men. 554 00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:33,960 There's William. William was part of the team... 555 00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:37,044 that sent the first satellite into orbit. 556 00:38:50,080 --> 00:38:52,811 They just aren't powerful enough to put me to sleep. 557 00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:54,570 Do you want to try Lunesta? 558 00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:56,285 What about Rohypnol? 559 00:38:56,520 --> 00:38:57,726 That's very strong. 560 00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:00,048 I need something strong. 561 00:39:10,360 --> 00:39:11,805 Hi, Alice. 562 00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:16,369 I am you and I have something very important to say to you. 563 00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:19,370 So you've reached the point where you can no longer answer... 564 00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:22,165 any of the questions. 565 00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:25,489 So this is the next logical step. 566 00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:27,489 I'm sure of it. 567 00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:30,524 In your bedroom there's a dresser with a blue lamp. 568 00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:32,849 Open the top drawer. 569 00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:36,203 In the back of the drawer, there's a bottle with pills in it. 570 00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:39,290 It says, "Take all pills with water." 571 00:39:39,520 --> 00:39:42,126 Now, there are a lot of pills in that bottle... 572 00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:45,767 but it's very important that you swallow them all. 573 00:39:47,880 --> 00:39:52,283 Okay? And then lie down and go to sleep. 574 00:39:52,960 --> 00:39:55,725 And don't tell anyone what you're doing. 575 00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:34,522 Ali! 576 00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:36,603 Ali! 577 00:41:44,920 --> 00:41:46,206 Oh, I love it here. 578 00:41:46,440 --> 00:41:48,204 Me too. 579 00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:10,920 - Remember Santorini? - Santorini. 580 00:42:11,120 --> 00:42:15,967 - Can you believe that was 30 years ago? - Don't do that to me. Oh, my God. 581 00:42:16,160 --> 00:42:18,367 Oh, it was a complicated time, huh? 582 00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:21,404 You were dealing with a lot. What was it, a year after? 583 00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:24,211 - Yeah, something like that. - Yeah. 584 00:42:24,400 --> 00:42:28,724 I know I've said this, but I am sorry I never got to meet your mom or your sister. 585 00:42:28,920 --> 00:42:30,729 Me too. 586 00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:33,010 We had a great time, though. 587 00:42:34,600 --> 00:42:37,888 - Yeah. - Don't you wish we had more of that? 588 00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:41,609 If you mean blow jobs on the beach, yes, I... 589 00:42:41,800 --> 00:42:44,246 - Yeah, but, you know. - I do wish we had more. 590 00:42:44,440 --> 00:42:46,602 Yeah, all of it. 591 00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:48,969 It all happened so fast, you know. 592 00:42:49,160 --> 00:42:51,640 Anna was born, our careers. 593 00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:53,484 Well, you were relentless. 594 00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:56,684 You wanted everything and all at once. 595 00:42:56,920 --> 00:43:00,527 That's how I am. That's how I like it. 596 00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:03,369 Anna's the same way, right? 597 00:43:03,920 --> 00:43:06,207 I like you the way you are. 598 00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:09,922 I like everything about you. 599 00:43:10,120 --> 00:43:12,282 Thank God you do. 600 00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:18,285 This is so great, you know. 601 00:43:18,480 --> 00:43:19,766 I kind of like it. 602 00:43:19,960 --> 00:43:22,884 Being liberated from Columbia. 603 00:43:23,120 --> 00:43:26,090 Why don't you take a sabbatical next year? 604 00:43:26,640 --> 00:43:30,440 And we're gonna do what, drive around the country in an RV? 605 00:43:30,720 --> 00:43:34,406 Sure. I don't know, we could spend more time here. 606 00:43:34,600 --> 00:43:35,647 Go to Bhutan. 607 00:43:35,880 --> 00:43:39,601 Well, I think our summer on the island is all the excitement I can handle. 608 00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:42,320 Okay. Well, you know what? 609 00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:46,286 This might be the last year that I'm myself, you know? 610 00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:53,922 Please don't say that. 611 00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:19,289 John? 612 00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:21,289 I'm over here. 613 00:44:21,480 --> 00:44:25,371 Oh, hey, when are you going to the conference? 614 00:44:26,880 --> 00:44:28,211 On Monday. 615 00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:31,324 - And when is Lydia coming? - Lydia comes on Sunday. 616 00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:34,040 She doesn't have to come just to babysit me. 617 00:44:34,520 --> 00:44:37,603 She's coming to do the Chekhov play at Saugatuck, remember? 618 00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:40,288 - Right. - When I get finished... 619 00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:44,007 - ...are we gonna go for a run? - Yeah, I need to grab another layer. 620 00:44:44,240 --> 00:44:45,651 Okay. 621 00:45:27,720 --> 00:45:30,929 - Hey, are we still going running? - Oh, I'm sorry. Hey, look. 622 00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,527 Look, I found this photo album... 623 00:45:33,720 --> 00:45:36,849 with these pictures of my mother and my sister. 624 00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:40,645 Hey, when are you going to the conference? 625 00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:44,086 - Monday. - And when is Lydia coming? 626 00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:46,408 Lydia's coming on Sunday. 627 00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:48,170 Okay. 628 00:45:49,400 --> 00:45:51,129 - Are we going running? - Yes. 629 00:45:51,320 --> 00:45:53,288 Yes, we are. I just have to go pee. 630 00:45:53,520 --> 00:45:55,170 I'll be right back. 631 00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:03,970 Ali? 632 00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:09,601 I couldn't find the bathroom. 633 00:47:09,840 --> 00:47:12,844 It's okay, baby. Come on, let's get you cleaned up. 634 00:47:13,600 --> 00:47:15,364 I don't know where I am. 635 00:47:36,960 --> 00:47:38,644 - I like that necklace. - You do? 636 00:47:38,840 --> 00:47:40,205 - Yeah. - Haven't seen this? 637 00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:41,845 Nope. 638 00:47:42,320 --> 00:47:44,721 My mother gave it to me. 639 00:47:45,360 --> 00:47:48,091 When I was a little girl... 640 00:47:48,280 --> 00:47:52,126 like, in second grade, my teacher told me... 641 00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:55,722 butterflies don't live a long time. They live, like, a month. 642 00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:59,686 And I was so upset, and I went home, and I told my mother, and she said: 643 00:47:59,880 --> 00:48:03,009 "Yeah, but, you know, they have a nice life. 644 00:48:03,200 --> 00:48:05,487 They have a really beautiful life." 645 00:48:05,680 --> 00:48:10,129 So now it always makes me think about my mother's life, and my sister's life. 646 00:48:10,360 --> 00:48:14,809 And to a certain extent, you know, my own. 647 00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:21,808 - You are gonna be around for a long time, Mom. - Yes, yes. 648 00:48:22,040 --> 00:48:24,168 There's some things I wanna do, you know? 649 00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:28,126 I wanna take a sabbatical with Daddy. I don't think that's gonna happen. 650 00:48:28,320 --> 00:48:32,882 And I wanna see Anna have a baby, and I wanna see Tom graduate. 651 00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:36,971 - You will. - And I'd like to see you go to college. 652 00:48:39,640 --> 00:48:43,326 Not for law or medicine or anything, but for drama. 653 00:48:43,560 --> 00:48:46,370 And if the acting thing doesn't work out, you could... 654 00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:50,724 You could teach or do workshops. You'd have some kind of a backup plan. 655 00:48:50,920 --> 00:48:52,604 Yeah. 656 00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:55,841 I don't want a backup plan. 657 00:48:56,520 --> 00:48:57,726 I... 658 00:48:57,920 --> 00:49:00,022 I wanna do this. I'm gonna give it a shot. 659 00:49:00,123 --> 00:49:02,806 It's not gonna happen if I don't believe in myself. 660 00:49:03,200 --> 00:49:06,807 I believe in you, Lydia. I do, I believe in you. 661 00:49:07,040 --> 00:49:09,850 It's just that, you know, life is tough. 662 00:49:10,040 --> 00:49:12,964 It is tougher than you know. 663 00:49:13,160 --> 00:49:14,321 And I... 664 00:49:14,520 --> 00:49:18,684 I just... I want you to have some kind of security before I go. 665 00:49:19,600 --> 00:49:21,762 Mom, for God... 666 00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:23,650 You have to... 667 00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:28,522 You can't use your situation to just get me to do everything... 668 00:49:28,720 --> 00:49:30,802 - ...you want me to do. - Why can't I? 669 00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:33,844 - Because that's not fair. - I don't have to be fair. 670 00:49:34,040 --> 00:49:35,929 I'm your mother. 671 00:49:36,560 --> 00:49:39,404 - Right? - Yeah. 672 00:50:20,160 --> 00:50:22,925 - Hey. - What's going on? 673 00:50:23,160 --> 00:50:25,447 I'm just working, how about you? 674 00:50:26,240 --> 00:50:28,129 Nothing. 675 00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:32,050 I need something to read. 676 00:50:32,240 --> 00:50:36,131 - I thought you were reading Moby-Dick. - Yeah, I was... 677 00:50:36,320 --> 00:50:41,281 but I got tired of reading the same page over and over again. I can't focus. 678 00:50:41,480 --> 00:50:44,165 Well, that happens to me when I read Moby-Dick too. 679 00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:47,887 - Why don't you try something lighter? - Like The Cat in the Hat? 680 00:50:48,080 --> 00:50:50,686 How about one of those plays Lydia has downstairs? 681 00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:53,201 They're quicker, they're easier to read. 682 00:50:53,440 --> 00:50:56,364 It might give the two of you something to talk about. 683 00:51:01,680 --> 00:51:03,648 Okay. 684 00:51:11,960 --> 00:51:14,406 You work all the time. 685 00:52:10,640 --> 00:52:15,168 What I liked about it was how... 686 00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:18,802 How big, how... 687 00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:24,006 How wide the scape of it was. 688 00:52:24,240 --> 00:52:25,844 Yeah. The scope of it. 689 00:52:26,080 --> 00:52:28,686 The scope, that's the word. Oh, God, listen to me. 690 00:52:28,880 --> 00:52:31,406 It's unbelievable you had to live through that. 691 00:52:32,320 --> 00:52:33,924 You must have known... 692 00:52:34,120 --> 00:52:36,441 Must have known somebody that died from AIDS. 693 00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:40,122 Oh, yeah, honey. Everybody did. 694 00:52:40,680 --> 00:52:43,206 We lost a lot of people. 695 00:52:44,760 --> 00:52:46,524 What did you think? 696 00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:49,730 I mean, you and Malcolm played the Mormons, right? 697 00:52:49,920 --> 00:52:53,003 The husband and wife? You did scenes in your acting class. 698 00:52:53,200 --> 00:52:55,009 Yeah, how'd you know that? 699 00:52:56,600 --> 00:52:58,967 I don't know, you must have told me. 700 00:52:59,560 --> 00:53:01,483 I didn't tell you. 701 00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:03,731 Well, then... 702 00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:05,809 I don't know how I know it. 703 00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:08,930 Mom, did you read my journal? 704 00:53:14,200 --> 00:53:16,009 Why? 705 00:53:16,200 --> 00:53:18,771 - Why would you do that, Mom? - Oh, gosh. 706 00:53:19,000 --> 00:53:21,571 I am so sorry. 707 00:53:21,800 --> 00:53:25,327 Lydia, I honestly didn't understand what I was reading. 708 00:53:25,520 --> 00:53:28,967 You didn't understand "Lydia Howland" written across the front? 709 00:53:29,160 --> 00:53:32,243 - I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I... - I don't believe you. 710 00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:33,965 I didn't mean to. 711 00:53:34,360 --> 00:53:35,521 Okay, it's fine. 712 00:53:35,720 --> 00:53:37,290 I just can't... 713 00:53:37,520 --> 00:53:40,444 - Lydia, I didn't... I really didn't know. - Just stop! 714 00:53:40,640 --> 00:53:42,961 I wouldn't do that to you. 715 00:53:45,440 --> 00:53:47,681 - So you can't eat this. - No, I know. 716 00:53:47,880 --> 00:53:51,805 No sushi, not hot do... Hot dogs are the worst. I love hot dogs. 717 00:53:52,040 --> 00:53:53,565 - No alcohol. - No alcohol. 718 00:53:53,760 --> 00:53:55,842 - No cigarettes. - Never even smoked. 719 00:53:56,080 --> 00:53:57,525 Well, you... I mean... 720 00:53:57,720 --> 00:54:00,690 - Never had one cigarette in your life? - Not one. 721 00:54:00,920 --> 00:54:02,570 We can't be too careful. 722 00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:06,885 He even grabbed my hand the other day as we were walking down the stairs. 723 00:54:07,080 --> 00:54:11,244 - Just trying to protect my investment. - Anna, return my "Words with Friends." 724 00:54:11,440 --> 00:54:13,920 Oh, I'm sorry, Mom. I haven't had time. 725 00:54:14,800 --> 00:54:15,847 - Yeah. - Hey. 726 00:54:16,040 --> 00:54:18,168 - Congrats. - Hey, hey. Thank you. 727 00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:22,810 - There you are. - Thanks. So twins, huh? 728 00:54:23,120 --> 00:54:25,600 - Yes, a boy and a girl. - Kind of perfect. 729 00:54:25,800 --> 00:54:28,963 - What your mother and I were hoping for. - It's so wonderful. 730 00:54:29,200 --> 00:54:30,565 Oh, gosh. 731 00:54:30,760 --> 00:54:33,604 I'm sorry, I've gotta take this. Hello? 732 00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:35,768 - How far along are you? - Five weeks. 733 00:54:36,000 --> 00:54:39,243 Right now, it's very early days, but... 734 00:54:39,440 --> 00:54:42,808 Well, the timing of things, how we found out and when we did... 735 00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:45,924 - ...well, it really worked out in the end. - Great. 736 00:54:46,360 --> 00:54:49,204 - That's amazing. - So, Mom, how you feeling? 737 00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:50,925 - Mostly fine. - Really? 738 00:54:51,120 --> 00:54:54,841 Yeah, I use this thing, you know, instead of a memory. 739 00:54:55,040 --> 00:54:57,725 Reminds me to take my medication, things like that. 740 00:54:57,920 --> 00:55:00,002 It's nice how the technology can help. 741 00:55:00,200 --> 00:55:04,125 - I think it has the same... - Lydia, what time is your play? 742 00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:05,561 Eight o'clock. 743 00:55:05,760 --> 00:55:07,728 - Nervous about tomorrow night? - Yes. 744 00:55:07,920 --> 00:55:10,605 I'll be fine, but I'll have to block you out. 745 00:55:10,800 --> 00:55:12,529 I'm sorry. What time again? 746 00:55:12,720 --> 00:55:14,085 - Eight o'clock. - Okay. 747 00:55:14,280 --> 00:55:18,001 - You don't have to schedule it. - I wanna put it in. And where is it? 748 00:55:18,200 --> 00:55:20,202 - The Saugatuck Theater. - Can you spell that? 749 00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:22,767 - S-A-U... - Mom, we're not gonna forget you. 750 00:55:23,000 --> 00:55:24,286 Just let her do it. 751 00:55:24,480 --> 00:55:27,404 - It's S-A-U-G-A-T-U-C-K. - Oh, God. 752 00:55:27,600 --> 00:55:29,204 - Anna, you're not helping. - You're not. 753 00:55:29,400 --> 00:55:31,801 Why worry about remembering something she doesn't have to? 754 00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:33,968 If you just let her, she won't worry. 755 00:55:34,360 --> 00:55:37,603 You don't have to talk about her like she's not sitting here. 756 00:55:37,800 --> 00:55:41,009 - I'm not, I'm talking to her. Aren't I, Mom? - Yes, you are. 757 00:55:41,200 --> 00:55:43,646 - Yes, and what makes you an expert? - Shut up. 758 00:55:43,840 --> 00:55:45,171 - Grow up, Lydia. - Suck it. 759 00:55:45,400 --> 00:55:46,731 That's very articulate. 760 00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:48,365 Girls, girls, you know... 761 00:55:48,560 --> 00:55:50,688 - Are you kidding me? - That's enough. 762 00:55:50,880 --> 00:55:52,928 - Stop it, please. - You shut up. 763 00:55:53,160 --> 00:55:56,050 - No, both of you, stop it. - What is going on here? 764 00:55:57,920 --> 00:56:00,685 Alice, this is a beautiful spread. 765 00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:03,368 Thank you, Charlie. 766 00:56:04,160 --> 00:56:07,642 - Very valuable... - Lydia, baby, I know that we argued... 767 00:56:07,880 --> 00:56:09,530 about something yesterday... 768 00:56:09,760 --> 00:56:13,082 but I can't remember what it was about. 769 00:56:14,960 --> 00:56:17,964 - It was nothing, honestly. - No, I upset you. 770 00:56:18,160 --> 00:56:22,290 And I should apologize. 771 00:56:24,920 --> 00:56:27,048 No, no. 772 00:56:27,240 --> 00:56:28,480 I should apologize. 773 00:56:28,680 --> 00:56:29,966 I'm... 774 00:56:30,640 --> 00:56:34,087 I feel really bad. I was so insensitive yesterday. 775 00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:38,609 Will you forgive me, honestly? 776 00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:41,244 But for what? 777 00:56:41,440 --> 00:56:47,891 It was about you respecting my privacy, and I don't want that. 778 00:56:48,080 --> 00:56:50,970 And I take it back completely. 779 00:56:51,720 --> 00:56:53,484 And I'm sorry, okay? 780 00:56:53,920 --> 00:56:55,729 I'm sorry. 781 00:56:59,640 --> 00:57:02,041 It's not as if I can remember it. 782 00:57:02,600 --> 00:57:06,286 Yeah, I know, right? That's why I tried to drop it. 783 00:57:13,480 --> 00:57:15,403 What's it like? 784 00:57:17,160 --> 00:57:19,731 Like, what does it actually feel like? 785 00:57:21,520 --> 00:57:24,364 Well, it's not always the same. 786 00:57:24,560 --> 00:57:28,360 You know, I have... I have good days and bad days. 787 00:57:28,560 --> 00:57:35,250 And on my good days, I can, you know, almost pass for a normal person. 788 00:57:35,440 --> 00:57:40,321 But on my bad days, I feel like I can't find myself. 789 00:57:42,160 --> 00:57:48,725 I've always been so defined by my intellect... 790 00:57:48,920 --> 00:57:52,766 my language, my articulation... 791 00:57:52,960 --> 00:57:56,965 and now, sometimes, I can see the words hanging in front of me... 792 00:57:57,200 --> 00:57:59,851 and I can't reach them. I don't know who I am... 793 00:58:00,080 --> 00:58:02,606 and I don't know what I'm gonna lose next. 794 00:58:08,480 --> 00:58:10,289 That sounds horrible. 795 00:58:15,960 --> 00:58:17,803 Thanks for asking. 796 00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:48,322 Oh, Lydia. 797 00:58:50,280 --> 00:58:52,408 They're leaving us. 798 00:58:52,760 --> 00:58:54,524 One has quite left us. 799 00:58:54,760 --> 00:58:57,240 Quite and forever. 800 00:58:57,440 --> 00:59:01,161 We alone remain to begin our lives over again. 801 00:59:01,360 --> 00:59:02,930 We must live. 802 00:59:03,120 --> 00:59:05,361 We must live. 803 00:59:06,120 --> 00:59:09,966 There will come a time when we all will know why... 804 00:59:10,720 --> 00:59:13,849 for what purpose there is all of this suffering... 805 00:59:15,640 --> 00:59:18,086 and there will be no mystery. 806 00:59:18,480 --> 00:59:20,164 But now we must live. 807 00:59:20,360 --> 00:59:24,570 We must work, just work. 808 00:59:25,760 --> 00:59:28,161 Tomorrow I'll go off on my own and I'll teach. 809 00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:32,331 I'll give everything I have to those who might, perhaps, need it. 810 00:59:34,200 --> 00:59:36,168 It's autumn now. 811 00:59:36,960 --> 00:59:40,851 Soon it will be winter. The snow will cover everything. 812 00:59:41,680 --> 00:59:43,762 And I'll be working. 813 00:59:45,880 --> 00:59:47,803 Just working. 814 01:00:08,840 --> 01:00:12,003 There she is. Hey, you were amazing. 815 01:00:12,200 --> 01:00:14,328 Yes, you were so good. 816 01:00:14,520 --> 01:00:18,206 - Incredible. - You killed it, totally. 817 01:00:18,960 --> 01:00:21,850 Miss Howland, would you sign this for me? 818 01:00:23,680 --> 01:00:25,728 It was just wonderful. 819 01:00:25,920 --> 01:00:28,764 I... I found it so easy to empathize with her. 820 01:00:28,960 --> 01:00:33,249 You... You really caught her despair, but also her joy. 821 01:00:34,440 --> 01:00:37,330 Thank you. Awesome. 822 01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:40,729 Will we get to see you in anything else this summer? 823 01:00:41,680 --> 01:00:43,648 No, this is the only job I got. 824 01:00:43,840 --> 01:00:46,684 Oh, so you're here for just the season. 825 01:00:51,120 --> 01:00:53,487 - Yeah. - Mom. Mom. 826 01:00:54,360 --> 01:00:56,124 This is Lydia, your daughter. 827 01:00:57,520 --> 01:01:00,524 No, I... I know that. 828 01:01:03,560 --> 01:01:05,642 Thanks for coming. Weird, embarrassing. 829 01:01:05,840 --> 01:01:09,367 Don't be embarrassed. Don't, please. Please don't be. 830 01:01:09,600 --> 01:01:11,250 Giraffe. 831 01:01:11,480 --> 01:01:13,528 Hammer. 832 01:01:14,920 --> 01:01:17,002 Comb. 833 01:01:17,560 --> 01:01:20,564 Oh, I know what that is. 834 01:01:20,760 --> 01:01:23,366 It is like a chicken, but it's not. 835 01:01:24,280 --> 01:01:27,204 It is a duck. 836 01:01:27,400 --> 01:01:28,686 How about this one? 837 01:01:28,880 --> 01:01:30,041 A basketball. 838 01:01:30,720 --> 01:01:35,362 - Can you spell water for me backwards? - Could I spell it forward first? 839 01:01:36,160 --> 01:01:41,405 W-A-T-E-R. 840 01:01:41,600 --> 01:01:48,210 R-E-T-A-W. 841 01:01:48,400 --> 01:01:49,606 That's very good. 842 01:01:49,800 --> 01:01:53,122 Now, can you tell me that name I asked you to remember? 843 01:01:53,320 --> 01:01:56,449 You always tell me, and I can never remember it. 844 01:01:56,640 --> 01:02:02,363 Was it John Black, John White, John Jones, or John Smith? 845 01:02:02,560 --> 01:02:03,607 Smith? 846 01:02:03,920 --> 01:02:07,208 And his address, was it East Street, Washington Street... 847 01:02:07,400 --> 01:02:09,801 Humboldt Street, or Main Street? 848 01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:14,324 Just to jump in here, we're both concerned about the rate of deterioration. 849 01:02:14,720 --> 01:02:18,042 - Is that normal? - Well, every case is different. 850 01:02:18,240 --> 01:02:21,881 With familial early onset, things can go fast. 851 01:02:22,080 --> 01:02:27,007 And with people who have a high level of education, things can go faster. 852 01:02:27,480 --> 01:02:30,324 They've managed to sustain their mental processes... 853 01:02:30,520 --> 01:02:34,730 through innovative means and that delays diagnosis. 854 01:02:34,920 --> 01:02:39,448 Now, clearly, Alice's memory is failing, but she's still incredibly resourceful. 855 01:02:39,640 --> 01:02:41,005 Thank you. 856 01:02:41,200 --> 01:02:43,487 I know you're... You're discouraged... 857 01:02:44,040 --> 01:02:47,123 but sometimes I've seen patients plateau at this point. 858 01:02:48,320 --> 01:02:50,129 Don't lose hope. 859 01:02:50,480 --> 01:02:54,326 I read your name in the Alzheimer's Association Care Conference brochure. 860 01:02:55,160 --> 01:02:57,766 - You're gonna give a speech. - Will you be there? 861 01:02:58,000 --> 01:02:59,809 Yes. I'm looking forward to it. 862 01:03:00,040 --> 01:03:04,090 I'm going to be away on business in Minnesota, and I'm worried. 863 01:03:04,280 --> 01:03:08,001 Are you sure this is a good idea, considering the state that she's in? 864 01:03:08,200 --> 01:03:11,488 - She's gonna be under a lot of stress. - It'll be great for her. 865 01:03:11,720 --> 01:03:14,963 Everything will be fine. But you're not worried about it... 866 01:03:15,160 --> 01:03:18,209 - ...are you, Alice? - No, I don't think so. 867 01:03:18,960 --> 01:03:24,046 "...various ways to prevent the production of amyloid... 868 01:03:24,240 --> 01:03:26,129 are being tried. 869 01:03:26,360 --> 01:03:29,125 There is a new study... 870 01:03:29,360 --> 01:03:33,843 that combines base and gamma secretase inhibitors... 871 01:03:34,080 --> 01:03:38,722 and this is one of our best hopes for the future." 872 01:03:38,960 --> 01:03:41,167 That's it. That's the end. 873 01:03:41,360 --> 01:03:44,204 It's good, Mom. It's good. 874 01:03:44,960 --> 01:03:48,123 - It's very scientific. - Yes, well, you know. 875 01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:52,803 Yeah. And I'm sure it's valid, but... 876 01:03:53,000 --> 01:03:54,525 But what? 877 01:03:54,760 --> 01:03:58,401 I mean, is there any value in making it a bit more personal? 878 01:03:58,880 --> 01:04:00,689 I don't understand what you mean. 879 01:04:00,880 --> 01:04:04,726 You know, you're not speaking to a room of scientists. 880 01:04:04,920 --> 01:04:09,323 What I wanna know, really, is, like, how you feel, what does it feel like? 881 01:04:09,520 --> 01:04:11,682 What does this disease mean to you? 882 01:04:11,880 --> 01:04:14,486 You weren't listening because that's all there. 883 01:04:14,680 --> 01:04:16,170 That's in the speech. 884 01:04:16,360 --> 01:04:17,725 Okay. 885 01:04:18,600 --> 01:04:22,969 - Don't ask me, then. - Oh, no, then I won't ask, then. 886 01:04:27,680 --> 01:04:29,125 Hey. 887 01:04:29,760 --> 01:04:32,570 Mom. Just give it one more shot, okay? 888 01:04:33,040 --> 01:04:36,761 I can't because I have done it already. 889 01:04:37,640 --> 01:04:41,247 I... I use this... 890 01:04:42,160 --> 01:04:44,925 Yellow... Yellow thingy to mark it... 891 01:04:45,120 --> 01:04:51,685 so I don't have to read the same line over and over and over and over again. 892 01:04:51,880 --> 01:04:53,041 Got it. Totally. 893 01:04:53,280 --> 01:04:55,328 Just print out one more. 894 01:04:55,520 --> 01:04:57,443 It took me three days to write this. 895 01:04:57,640 --> 01:05:01,361 - You can print out one more. - No, it took me three days. 896 01:05:02,240 --> 01:05:04,288 - Sorry. - Three days. 897 01:05:29,200 --> 01:05:30,326 Here you are. 898 01:05:31,760 --> 01:05:33,171 Thank you. 899 01:05:43,800 --> 01:05:45,848 - Hi. - Hi. 900 01:05:46,440 --> 01:05:48,408 - Hello there. - Hello. 901 01:05:49,640 --> 01:05:52,769 Hi. Oh, Tom, this is my doctor. 902 01:05:52,960 --> 01:05:54,371 - My son. - Travis Benjamin. 903 01:05:54,560 --> 01:05:57,040 - I'm your mother's neurologist. - My son, Tom. 904 01:05:57,240 --> 01:06:00,050 - Pleasure. - So how you feeling, Alice? 905 01:06:00,400 --> 01:06:01,890 I think I'm nervous. 906 01:06:02,080 --> 01:06:04,731 You're gonna do great. Break a leg. 907 01:06:04,920 --> 01:06:07,002 - Nice to meet you. - Yeah. 908 01:06:10,480 --> 01:06:15,122 It is a great honor to welcome our next speaker, Alice Howland. 909 01:06:15,360 --> 01:06:17,966 A former professor of linguistics at Columbia... 910 01:06:18,200 --> 01:06:22,285 she's written textbooks and has lectured all over the world. 911 01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:24,926 Alice is living with early onset Alzheimer's... 912 01:06:25,160 --> 01:06:28,448 with the care and support of her loving family. 913 01:06:28,640 --> 01:06:31,883 Please welcome Alice Howland. 914 01:06:40,040 --> 01:06:43,601 Please give me just a minute. 915 01:06:50,960 --> 01:06:52,644 "Good morning. 916 01:06:52,840 --> 01:06:55,320 It's an honor to be here. 917 01:06:55,920 --> 01:06:59,242 The poet Elizabeth Bishop once wrote: 918 01:06:59,440 --> 01:07:03,604 'The art of losing isn't hard to master. 919 01:07:03,800 --> 01:07:07,600 So many things seem filled with the intent to be lost... 920 01:07:07,800 --> 01:07:10,804 that their loss is no disaster.' 921 01:07:11,040 --> 01:07:12,724 I am not a poet. 922 01:07:12,960 --> 01:07:16,851 I am a person living with early onset Alzheimer's. 923 01:07:17,040 --> 01:07:24,049 And as that person, I find myself learning the art of losing every day. 924 01:07:27,840 --> 01:07:33,006 Losing my bearings, losing objects, losing sleep... 925 01:07:33,200 --> 01:07:35,726 but mostly, losing memories." 926 01:07:36,040 --> 01:07:37,724 Oh, no. 927 01:07:43,840 --> 01:07:45,524 Thank you. 928 01:07:47,240 --> 01:07:50,608 I think I'll try to forget that just happened. 929 01:07:56,480 --> 01:08:00,121 "All my life, I've accumulated memories. 930 01:08:00,320 --> 01:08:04,609 They've become, in a way, my most precious possessions. 931 01:08:04,800 --> 01:08:07,201 The night I met my husband... 932 01:08:08,200 --> 01:08:11,329 the first time I held my textbook in my hands... 933 01:08:12,520 --> 01:08:18,721 having children, making friends, traveling the world. 934 01:08:18,920 --> 01:08:21,002 Everything I accumulated in life... 935 01:08:21,640 --> 01:08:24,166 everything I've worked so hard for... 936 01:08:24,360 --> 01:08:27,921 now all that is being ripped away. 937 01:08:28,240 --> 01:08:34,566 As you can imagine or as you know, this is hell. 938 01:08:35,360 --> 01:08:37,169 But it gets worse. 939 01:08:39,960 --> 01:08:41,485 Who can take us seriously... 940 01:08:41,720 --> 01:08:44,644 when we are so far from who we once were? 941 01:08:44,840 --> 01:08:48,686 Our strange behavior and fumbled sentences... 942 01:08:48,880 --> 01:08:55,729 change others' perceptions of us and our perception of ourselves. 943 01:08:55,920 --> 01:09:02,246 We become ridiculous, incapable, comic. 944 01:09:02,560 --> 01:09:04,801 But this is not who we are. 945 01:09:05,000 --> 01:09:06,764 This is our disease. 946 01:09:06,960 --> 01:09:10,760 And like any disease, it has a cause... 947 01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:13,128 it has a progression... 948 01:09:13,320 --> 01:09:16,051 and it could have a cure. 949 01:09:16,440 --> 01:09:20,650 My greatest wish is that my children... 950 01:09:21,000 --> 01:09:27,610 our children, the next generation, do not have to face what I am facing. 951 01:09:28,080 --> 01:09:30,560 But for the time being, I'm still alive. 952 01:09:31,240 --> 01:09:32,401 I know I'm alive. 953 01:09:33,280 --> 01:09:34,805 I have people I love dearly. 954 01:09:36,120 --> 01:09:39,203 I have things I wanna do with my life. 955 01:09:40,440 --> 01:09:45,321 I rail against myself for not being able to remember things... 956 01:09:45,520 --> 01:09:50,651 but I still have moments in the day of pure happiness and joy. 957 01:09:50,840 --> 01:09:54,526 And please, do not think that I am suffering. 958 01:09:54,960 --> 01:09:57,201 I am not suffering. 959 01:09:57,400 --> 01:09:59,129 I am struggling. 960 01:09:59,320 --> 01:10:02,927 Struggling to be a part of things... 961 01:10:03,120 --> 01:10:08,126 to stay connected to who I once was. 962 01:10:09,640 --> 01:10:12,450 'So live in the moment, ' I tell myself. 963 01:10:12,680 --> 01:10:15,047 It's really all I can do. 964 01:10:15,240 --> 01:10:17,208 Live in the moment. 965 01:10:17,440 --> 01:10:21,081 And not beat myself up too much... 966 01:10:21,320 --> 01:10:24,927 And not beat myself up too much... 967 01:10:25,120 --> 01:10:29,011 for mastering the art of losing. 968 01:10:30,040 --> 01:10:35,285 One thing I will try to hold on to, though, is the memory of speaking here today. 969 01:10:36,240 --> 01:10:37,526 It will go. 970 01:10:37,720 --> 01:10:39,768 I know it will. 971 01:10:40,240 --> 01:10:42,971 It may be gone by tomorrow... 972 01:10:43,640 --> 01:10:49,966 but it means so much to be talking here today... 973 01:10:50,240 --> 01:10:52,641 like my old, ambitious self... 974 01:10:52,840 --> 01:10:55,320 who was so fascinated by communication." 975 01:11:03,120 --> 01:11:05,851 Thank you for this opportunity. 976 01:11:06,640 --> 01:11:08,961 It means the world to me. 977 01:11:11,840 --> 01:11:13,649 Thank you. 978 01:11:49,200 --> 01:11:51,362 It's the Mayo Clinic. 979 01:11:51,720 --> 01:11:53,882 It would start up next spring. 980 01:11:54,120 --> 01:11:56,361 And I'd be heading up my own team. 981 01:11:56,560 --> 01:11:59,450 So you want us to move to...? 982 01:12:00,360 --> 01:12:01,930 It's in Rochester, Minnesota. 983 01:12:02,600 --> 01:12:05,171 Well, it could be a whole new adventure for us. 984 01:12:05,360 --> 01:12:09,081 - You might even like it there. - Everything I know is here. 985 01:12:09,280 --> 01:12:13,569 Anna and Tom and the babies that are coming. 986 01:12:13,800 --> 01:12:17,361 It's just a two-hour flight. We'd see them as often as we do now. 987 01:12:17,960 --> 01:12:19,405 Ali, this just came up... 988 01:12:19,640 --> 01:12:23,281 and they haven't even made a formal offer, but don't you see? 989 01:12:23,520 --> 01:12:26,729 This is it. They're working on many cutting-edge treatments. 990 01:12:26,920 --> 01:12:28,888 - They've got resources. - I understand. 991 01:12:29,080 --> 01:12:31,845 I understand that work is important. 992 01:12:32,040 --> 01:12:34,566 I miss working. 993 01:12:35,680 --> 01:12:41,483 I think you should ask them if you can start in a year. 994 01:12:42,680 --> 01:12:45,286 It's not academia. They don't give sabbaticals. 995 01:12:45,480 --> 01:12:49,451 But to pick up and move... 996 01:12:49,640 --> 01:12:53,167 right when... When... When... 997 01:12:53,880 --> 01:12:55,689 Why can't I say what I wanna say? 998 01:12:55,880 --> 01:12:58,690 Ali, one way or the other, we'll still be together. 999 01:12:58,880 --> 01:13:01,804 So no time off? 1000 01:13:02,000 --> 01:13:05,163 I can't take a year off. Financially, that's not an option... 1001 01:13:05,400 --> 01:13:08,404 and God knows where we'll be further down the line. 1002 01:13:08,600 --> 01:13:10,443 That's it then. That's it. 1003 01:13:10,640 --> 01:13:14,361 - What? - Well, you don't... You don't want that. 1004 01:13:14,560 --> 01:13:18,804 A year at home with me, watching this. 1005 01:13:21,360 --> 01:13:22,486 I didn't say that. 1006 01:13:22,680 --> 01:13:24,682 You didn't have to. 1007 01:14:36,840 --> 01:14:38,171 Ali, what are you doing? 1008 01:14:38,360 --> 01:14:39,646 I can't find it. 1009 01:14:39,840 --> 01:14:42,207 - You can't find what? - I can't find my phone. 1010 01:14:42,400 --> 01:14:46,086 - It's the middle of the night. - It's important. It goes off at 8:00... 1011 01:14:46,280 --> 01:14:49,045 and it asks me these questions. I have to find it. 1012 01:14:49,240 --> 01:14:51,971 - We'll look for it in the morning. - I have to find it. 1013 01:14:52,160 --> 01:14:54,447 - Help me find my phone! - I'll help tomorrow. 1014 01:14:54,640 --> 01:14:57,246 - I promise you. Tomorrow. - Help me. No! I want it. 1015 01:14:57,440 --> 01:14:59,568 - I'll help you find it. - Help me find it. 1016 01:14:59,800 --> 01:15:04,089 - I promise, but come to bed. Come. - Help me. God. Help me find my phone. 1017 01:15:04,440 --> 01:15:06,920 - Come to bed with me, please. - All right. 1018 01:15:07,200 --> 01:15:10,044 - Please? - Okay. 1019 01:15:10,640 --> 01:15:11,687 Come on. 1020 01:15:12,640 --> 01:15:16,042 Since the beginning, I completely understand the situation. 1021 01:15:16,280 --> 01:15:18,044 Hey. 1022 01:15:19,640 --> 01:15:22,803 - Anne? - I look forward to seeing you guys. 1023 01:15:23,120 --> 01:15:27,444 - Hi. - Hey, Mama. Hey. 1024 01:15:28,960 --> 01:15:30,086 It's Anna, Mom. 1025 01:15:31,040 --> 01:15:33,281 I thought you were my sister. 1026 01:15:33,480 --> 01:15:35,482 - It's okay. - How are you feeling? 1027 01:15:35,680 --> 01:15:38,490 Oh, so uncomfortable. 1028 01:15:38,720 --> 01:15:41,883 I can't breathe, I can't sleep. 1029 01:15:42,080 --> 01:15:43,605 Was it like this for you? 1030 01:15:43,800 --> 01:15:45,723 I didn't have two at a time. 1031 01:15:45,920 --> 01:15:47,490 This is true. 1032 01:15:47,680 --> 01:15:50,524 - Did you get the green curry? - I did. It's right here. 1033 01:15:50,720 --> 01:15:52,484 - Oh, great. - Everything on track? 1034 01:15:52,680 --> 01:15:55,331 Yes. They made a very generous offer. 1035 01:15:55,520 --> 01:15:57,966 - Oh, that's great. - I guess. 1036 01:15:58,160 --> 01:16:00,242 No, it is. It's the right decision. 1037 01:16:00,720 --> 01:16:02,643 - Would you like some water? - Yes. 1038 01:16:02,840 --> 01:16:05,684 John, what happened? Who was on the phone? 1039 01:16:05,880 --> 01:16:09,168 That was that hospital, honey, the Mayo Clinic. 1040 01:16:09,360 --> 01:16:10,771 Is someone sick? 1041 01:16:11,000 --> 01:16:12,490 No. Nothing's wrong. 1042 01:16:12,680 --> 01:16:15,126 Everything's absolutely fine. 1043 01:16:16,920 --> 01:16:18,922 Oh, my God. 1044 01:16:21,240 --> 01:16:23,766 Oh, no. 1045 01:16:25,920 --> 01:16:29,208 I was looking for that last night. 1046 01:16:31,080 --> 01:16:34,129 - That was a month ago. - Right. 1047 01:17:52,880 --> 01:17:54,848 Ali. Hey. 1048 01:17:57,120 --> 01:17:59,646 Wake up, baby. It's time to wake up. 1049 01:18:00,680 --> 01:18:02,444 It's time to get dressed. 1050 01:18:02,640 --> 01:18:04,529 I'm gonna help you. 1051 01:18:06,400 --> 01:18:08,880 I've got some very good news for you. 1052 01:18:15,600 --> 01:18:18,331 Let me help you with your pants. Come. 1053 01:18:18,920 --> 01:18:22,208 No, I... I want my green one. 1054 01:18:22,400 --> 01:18:25,404 Oh, no, I think this one will be really, really nice. 1055 01:18:25,600 --> 01:18:27,568 Let's put that one on. 1056 01:18:27,800 --> 01:18:29,290 Okay. 1057 01:18:32,280 --> 01:18:35,170 Okay. Lean on me. 1058 01:18:37,160 --> 01:18:38,491 Okay, hold on. 1059 01:18:47,480 --> 01:18:49,130 Oh, there she is. Hey. 1060 01:18:49,320 --> 01:18:51,322 What's the matter? She looks terrible. 1061 01:18:51,520 --> 01:18:54,046 Well, she just delivered the babies, honey. 1062 01:18:57,400 --> 01:19:02,930 - Anna, you had your babies. - I did, Mom. 1063 01:19:04,240 --> 01:19:06,402 - This is Allison. - You look so beautiful. 1064 01:19:06,600 --> 01:19:08,204 - Thank you. - That's Charlie Jr. 1065 01:19:08,400 --> 01:19:10,129 - Little Charlie. - My goodness. 1066 01:19:10,320 --> 01:19:11,924 Yes. 1067 01:19:14,920 --> 01:19:18,049 - There you go. - Can I hold her? 1068 01:19:18,360 --> 01:19:20,283 Is that a good idea? 1069 01:19:21,080 --> 01:19:23,481 I know how to hold a baby. 1070 01:19:24,040 --> 01:19:27,601 That's okay. Mom, you can sit right there in that chair. 1071 01:19:28,320 --> 01:19:31,324 There. That's good. 1072 01:19:32,600 --> 01:19:35,729 There we go. All right. 1073 01:19:36,160 --> 01:19:38,288 Hi. 1074 01:19:38,760 --> 01:19:41,491 Something tells me you've done this before. 1075 01:19:51,440 --> 01:19:53,010 She looks like you. 1076 01:20:03,400 --> 01:20:06,085 There are days she knows where she is, certainly... 1077 01:20:06,320 --> 01:20:09,130 but there are just as many days when she doesn't. 1078 01:20:09,720 --> 01:20:13,202 Maybe she thinks she's a child back in New Hampshire or who knows? 1079 01:20:13,400 --> 01:20:16,688 It's happening more and more. She doesn't know what's going on. 1080 01:20:16,880 --> 01:20:18,530 Yeah, I just... 1081 01:20:18,720 --> 01:20:22,122 I keep thinking about what she said in that speech, you know... 1082 01:20:22,320 --> 01:20:24,243 how important her memories are to who she is. 1083 01:20:24,440 --> 01:20:26,249 Yes, but that was months ago. 1084 01:20:26,440 --> 01:20:28,966 Guys, this is difficult for all of us. 1085 01:20:29,160 --> 01:20:32,721 But it's important to remember who Alice was. 1086 01:20:32,920 --> 01:20:35,082 She would not want to be a burden. 1087 01:20:35,280 --> 01:20:38,045 Anna, you have the babies, you wanna go back to work. 1088 01:20:38,240 --> 01:20:41,449 You're not in a position to care for her, not seriously, Tom. 1089 01:20:41,640 --> 01:20:43,768 And I can't keep Mayo waiting. 1090 01:20:43,960 --> 01:20:47,521 The beginning of this month, I am gone. I want to take her with me. 1091 01:20:47,720 --> 01:20:52,089 I will get her the best possible care, and once she's adjusted to Minnesota... 1092 01:20:52,320 --> 01:20:56,006 she will be happier for it, and so will all of us. 1093 01:21:00,600 --> 01:21:02,682 - Lydia's gonna flip. - Oh, so let her. 1094 01:21:02,920 --> 01:21:05,969 - Well, she is. - Well, she has no right to. 1095 01:21:06,160 --> 01:21:08,891 If she cared, she wouldn't be on the other side of the country. 1096 01:21:09,080 --> 01:21:11,287 Hot in here. 1097 01:21:16,640 --> 01:21:18,722 Who is he exactly? 1098 01:21:18,920 --> 01:21:22,720 His name is Bill Thompson. He's a manager. 1099 01:21:22,920 --> 01:21:25,446 Why is he so important? 1100 01:21:26,720 --> 01:21:28,609 He'll open doors for me. 1101 01:21:28,800 --> 01:21:31,610 Get me into auditions I wouldn't be able to get into. 1102 01:21:31,800 --> 01:21:33,564 Got me some good headshots. 1103 01:21:33,760 --> 01:21:35,603 I see. 1104 01:21:35,840 --> 01:21:37,808 What's his name? 1105 01:21:38,280 --> 01:21:40,044 Bill Thompson. 1106 01:21:40,240 --> 01:21:42,049 He's with Thompson and Gould... 1107 01:21:42,240 --> 01:21:44,527 if you wanna look him up. They're good. 1108 01:21:44,720 --> 01:21:46,882 Kettle's boiling. 1109 01:21:49,720 --> 01:21:51,484 Where's Elena? 1110 01:21:51,760 --> 01:21:54,889 I'm making myself a cup of tea. 1111 01:21:55,280 --> 01:21:59,842 Cool. Where's your caretaker? 1112 01:22:01,440 --> 01:22:04,046 Elena's not here today. 1113 01:22:04,240 --> 01:22:08,086 Her daughter's sick. She's at the doctor. 1114 01:22:10,040 --> 01:22:11,804 So you're alone? 1115 01:22:13,000 --> 01:22:16,288 I can make myself a cup of tea. 1116 01:22:16,880 --> 01:22:18,450 Okay. 1117 01:22:19,880 --> 01:22:21,370 Okay. 1118 01:22:21,960 --> 01:22:24,884 You wanna check out my headshot? If I send you a link... 1119 01:22:25,120 --> 01:22:28,681 can you open the file, download the file? 1120 01:22:29,280 --> 01:22:31,009 Yes. 1121 01:22:32,160 --> 01:22:33,605 Good. 1122 01:22:34,480 --> 01:22:36,244 Okay. 1123 01:22:37,920 --> 01:22:39,809 I'll talk to you later. I love you. 1124 01:22:40,000 --> 01:22:42,571 - Bye. - Bye. 1125 01:23:15,120 --> 01:23:16,201 Hi. 1126 01:23:16,400 --> 01:23:21,122 Alice, I'm you, and I have something very important to say to you. 1127 01:23:22,040 --> 01:23:26,728 You've reached that point, the point where you can't answer the questions. 1128 01:23:26,920 --> 01:23:30,083 So this is the next logical step. 1129 01:23:30,280 --> 01:23:32,123 I'm sure of it. 1130 01:23:32,600 --> 01:23:34,967 Because what's happened to you. The... 1131 01:23:35,160 --> 01:23:39,085 You know, the Alzheimer's. You could see it as tragic, but... 1132 01:23:39,640 --> 01:23:41,802 your life has been anything but tragic. 1133 01:23:42,000 --> 01:23:45,083 You have had a remarkable career... 1134 01:23:45,280 --> 01:23:47,044 and a great marriage... 1135 01:23:47,240 --> 01:23:49,641 and three beautiful children. 1136 01:23:52,160 --> 01:23:55,369 All right, listen to me. 1137 01:23:56,760 --> 01:23:57,921 This is important. 1138 01:23:58,120 --> 01:24:00,964 Make sure that you're alone and go to your bedroom. 1139 01:24:01,160 --> 01:24:04,403 In your bedroom, there's a dresser with a blue lamp. 1140 01:24:04,840 --> 01:24:06,683 Open the top drawer. 1141 01:24:06,880 --> 01:24:10,521 In the back of the drawer, there's a bottle with pills in it. 1142 01:24:10,720 --> 01:24:14,122 It says, "Take all pills with water." 1143 01:24:14,360 --> 01:24:17,204 Now, there are a lot of pills in that bottle... 1144 01:24:17,440 --> 01:24:22,321 but it's very important that you swallow them all, okay? 1145 01:24:22,520 --> 01:24:26,161 And then lie down... 1146 01:24:26,360 --> 01:24:28,203 and go to sleep. 1147 01:24:30,720 --> 01:24:34,327 And don't tell anyone what you're doing, okay? 1148 01:25:03,280 --> 01:25:06,284 In your bedroom, there's a dresser with a blue lamp. 1149 01:25:06,480 --> 01:25:08,369 Open the top drawer. 1150 01:25:08,560 --> 01:25:12,042 In the back of the drawer, there's a bottle with pills in it. 1151 01:25:12,240 --> 01:25:15,562 It says, "Take all pills with water." 1152 01:25:18,520 --> 01:25:22,889 Dresser with lamp. Dresser... 1153 01:25:23,080 --> 01:25:26,243 Blue lamp. Dresser. 1154 01:25:38,760 --> 01:25:41,604 Make sure that you're alone and go to your bedroom. 1155 01:25:41,800 --> 01:25:45,202 In your bedroom, there's a dresser with a blue lamp. 1156 01:25:45,400 --> 01:25:47,323 Open the top drawer. 1157 01:25:47,520 --> 01:25:51,127 In the back of the drawer, there's a bottle with pills in it. 1158 01:25:51,320 --> 01:25:54,767 It says, "Take all pills with water." 1159 01:25:55,000 --> 01:25:57,606 Now, there are a lot of pills in that bottle... 1160 01:25:57,840 --> 01:26:02,971 but it's very important that you swallow them all, okay? 1161 01:26:03,160 --> 01:26:08,769 And then lie down and go to sleep. 1162 01:26:11,360 --> 01:26:16,082 And don't tell anyone what you're doing, okay? 1163 01:26:34,960 --> 01:26:36,610 Hello? 1164 01:27:09,640 --> 01:27:12,723 May I have a cookies-and-cream and a chocolate hazelnut? 1165 01:27:13,200 --> 01:27:14,531 You know what you want. 1166 01:27:14,720 --> 01:27:16,848 Cookies-and-cream and chocolate hazelnut. 1167 01:27:17,080 --> 01:27:20,289 You usually have the original with blueberries and coconut. 1168 01:27:20,480 --> 01:27:21,527 Okay. 1169 01:27:21,720 --> 01:27:24,849 Original with blueberries and coconut, please. 1170 01:27:34,880 --> 01:27:37,565 Ali, you see that building over there? 1171 01:27:37,920 --> 01:27:39,524 Do you know what that is? 1172 01:27:40,520 --> 01:27:42,966 I don't think I know that. 1173 01:27:43,600 --> 01:27:46,888 That's Columbia, where you used to teach. 1174 01:27:47,760 --> 01:27:51,242 Someone told me I was a good teacher. 1175 01:27:51,440 --> 01:27:54,171 Yes. You were. 1176 01:27:56,280 --> 01:27:57,770 I was really smart. 1177 01:28:00,080 --> 01:28:03,004 You were the smartest person I've ever met. 1178 01:28:09,240 --> 01:28:13,723 Ali, do you still wanna be here? 1179 01:28:17,520 --> 01:28:19,204 I'm not done yet. 1180 01:28:19,400 --> 01:28:20,731 Do we have to go? 1181 01:28:22,400 --> 01:28:23,811 No. 1182 01:28:24,960 --> 01:28:26,610 Don't worry. 1183 01:28:26,800 --> 01:28:28,643 Take your time. 1184 01:28:52,760 --> 01:28:56,810 - Is this all of your stuff? - I shipped some boxes as well. 1185 01:28:57,280 --> 01:28:59,567 Are you sad to leave L.A.? 1186 01:28:59,880 --> 01:29:02,724 I'm trying to convince myself I'm an East Coast girl. 1187 01:29:02,920 --> 01:29:04,524 Where's Mom? 1188 01:29:04,840 --> 01:29:06,683 She's sleeping. 1189 01:29:10,600 --> 01:29:12,728 Well, here it is. 1190 01:29:13,200 --> 01:29:15,043 Your old room. 1191 01:29:23,000 --> 01:29:25,924 So how did it work out with your manager? 1192 01:29:26,880 --> 01:29:30,521 It's a West Coast company, you know. Not so good. 1193 01:29:31,080 --> 01:29:34,402 Well, that's too bad. Are you sure you don't mind? 1194 01:29:36,000 --> 01:29:38,367 We've had this conversation. 1195 01:29:39,120 --> 01:29:40,610 Okay. 1196 01:29:40,800 --> 01:29:44,725 It's New York City. I'll audition, do theater. 1197 01:29:45,600 --> 01:29:48,444 I know that this is where I need to be, though, so... 1198 01:29:49,520 --> 01:29:51,887 You're a better man than I am. 1199 01:29:53,760 --> 01:29:57,367 Dad, I've got her, okay? 1200 01:30:42,880 --> 01:30:45,247 It's getting pretty cold, huh? 1201 01:30:45,960 --> 01:30:47,769 Wanna head home? 1202 01:30:49,360 --> 01:30:51,283 Come on, let's do it. 1203 01:31:15,280 --> 01:31:17,089 - Hey. - Hi. 1204 01:31:17,680 --> 01:31:18,966 How was your walk? 1205 01:31:19,200 --> 01:31:20,770 I don't think I know you. 1206 01:31:20,960 --> 01:31:23,088 - Yes, you do. - Hey, Mom, it's Elena. 1207 01:31:23,280 --> 01:31:25,203 I'm gonna get you some juice, okay? 1208 01:31:25,400 --> 01:31:28,927 Come, let's take off your coat and go inside. 1209 01:31:45,360 --> 01:31:49,001 "Night flight to San Francisco, chase the moon across America. 1210 01:31:49,760 --> 01:31:52,730 God, it's been years since I was on a plane. 1211 01:31:53,040 --> 01:31:56,283 When we hit 35,000 feet, we'll have reached the tropopause... 1212 01:31:56,480 --> 01:31:59,689 the great belt of calm air. 1213 01:32:00,840 --> 01:32:05,289 As close to the ozone as I'll get, I... I dreamed we were there. 1214 01:32:05,960 --> 01:32:09,009 The plane leapt the tropopause... 1215 01:32:09,560 --> 01:32:14,088 the safe air, and attained the outer rim, the ozone, which was ragged and torn... 1216 01:32:14,280 --> 01:32:18,330 patches of it threadbare as old cheesecloth, and that was... 1217 01:32:19,080 --> 01:32:20,889 frightening. 1218 01:32:21,520 --> 01:32:23,124 But I saw something only I could see... 1219 01:32:23,320 --> 01:32:26,449 because of my astonishing ability to see such things. 1220 01:32:28,480 --> 01:32:31,131 Souls were rising... 1221 01:32:32,320 --> 01:32:34,926 from the earth far below, souls of the dead... 1222 01:32:35,120 --> 01:32:37,566 of people who'd perished... 1223 01:32:37,760 --> 01:32:40,764 from famine, from war, from the plague... 1224 01:32:42,560 --> 01:32:48,249 and they floated up, like skydivers in reverse... 1225 01:32:48,440 --> 01:32:53,128 limbs all akimbo, wheeling, spinning. 1226 01:32:54,360 --> 01:32:56,966 The souls of these departed joined hands, clasped ankles... 1227 01:32:57,160 --> 01:33:01,210 and formed a web, a great net of souls. 1228 01:33:02,680 --> 01:33:06,605 And the souls were three-atom oxygen molecules of the stuff of ozone... 1229 01:33:06,800 --> 01:33:10,850 and the outer rim absorbed them, and was repaired. 1230 01:33:14,760 --> 01:33:17,445 Because nothing is lost forever. 1231 01:33:21,120 --> 01:33:23,930 In this world, there's a kind of painful progress. 1232 01:33:24,160 --> 01:33:27,164 A longing for what we've left behind... 1233 01:33:29,160 --> 01:33:31,208 and dreaming ahead. 1234 01:33:32,280 --> 01:33:34,487 At least I think that's so." 1235 01:33:36,920 --> 01:33:38,570 That's it. 1236 01:33:47,680 --> 01:33:48,920 Hey. 1237 01:33:52,560 --> 01:33:54,528 Did you like that? 1238 01:33:58,720 --> 01:34:02,088 What I just read, did you like it? 1239 01:34:02,880 --> 01:34:04,450 Yeah. 1240 01:34:10,720 --> 01:34:12,484 And what...? 1241 01:34:13,680 --> 01:34:15,364 What was it about? 1242 01:34:19,440 --> 01:34:21,090 Love. 1243 01:34:21,840 --> 01:34:22,887 Yeah. Love. 1244 01:34:24,000 --> 01:34:25,684 Yeah, Mom. 1245 01:34:27,720 --> 01:34:29,848 It was about love. 1245 01:34:30,305 --> 01:34:36,905 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/f9nb Help other users to choose the best subtitles