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2
00:02:53,439 --> 00:02:56,169
I can't believe
I didn't get a pedicure for this.
3
00:02:56,576 --> 00:03:00,103
How embarrassing. Look at that.
4
00:03:00,313 --> 00:03:04,113
If I were with a real guy doing this,
I would've gotten a pedicure.
5
00:03:04,284 --> 00:03:05,876
And a wax.
6
00:03:06,252 --> 00:03:08,812
Oh, shit, that one's worse.
7
00:03:08,988 --> 00:03:11,752
- Sorry I didn't get a pedicure.
- What?
8
00:03:13,092 --> 00:03:14,753
My toes.
9
00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:16,987
- I'm sorry.
- I'm not looking at your toes.
10
00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:20,223
- I'm looking at your cervix.
- Right.
11
00:03:20,767 --> 00:03:22,997
Now I kind of wish
you were looking at my toes.
12
00:03:24,237 --> 00:03:25,636
- All done.
- That's it?
13
00:03:25,805 --> 00:03:29,764
We'll elevate your legs for
10 minutes and you'll be good to go.
14
00:03:31,411 --> 00:03:34,403
First time I hear that ticking clock
and I'm not freaking out.
15
00:03:34,581 --> 00:03:37,744
- Good. Just relax.
- I can't. I'm totally freaking out.
16
00:03:37,917 --> 00:03:39,782
Come on.
Everything's gonna be great.
17
00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:41,944
I have a feeling that you and...
18
00:03:42,155 --> 00:03:46,455
...CRM-1014 are gonna
make beautiful babies together.
19
00:03:48,962 --> 00:03:51,157
Yeah. Thank you.
20
00:03:59,939 --> 00:04:02,635
Oh, God, I hope this works.
21
00:04:02,976 --> 00:04:05,740
I've wanted this for so long.
22
00:04:05,945 --> 00:04:09,642
Maybe this isn't how
I pictured it exactly.
23
00:04:09,816 --> 00:04:11,681
Thought I'd have
a little more support.
24
00:04:11,851 --> 00:04:16,788
- No! You don't want kids. Trust me.
- Easy for you to say. You have four.
25
00:04:16,956 --> 00:04:21,017
- And it's awful. They've ruined my life!
- Hi, munchkins.
26
00:04:21,194 --> 00:04:22,559
What? No! Go away!
27
00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:25,629
Have you seen my vagina?
I mean, have you?
28
00:04:25,798 --> 00:04:29,131
Because I would show it to you.
I will show it to you just to prove...
29
00:04:29,302 --> 00:04:33,136
...that you don't want to have kids.
I will show you my vagina.
30
00:04:33,306 --> 00:04:35,297
I don't want to see that.
I want a baby.
31
00:04:35,475 --> 00:04:38,467
I think you're tired of being alone.
Haven't met the right guy.
32
00:04:38,645 --> 00:04:43,207
Not about a guy. I've dated hundreds
of guys over the past five years.
33
00:04:43,383 --> 00:04:45,248
Not one of them's close
to being the one.
34
00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:47,045
It's just not happening for me.
35
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:50,415
- Yeah, but doesn't mean that it won't.
- Doesn't mean that it will.
36
00:04:50,590 --> 00:04:53,150
Is that my chicken?
What are you doing?
37
00:04:53,326 --> 00:04:54,384
Give it back!
38
00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:58,519
That is your dinner, not a toy!
39
00:04:59,332 --> 00:05:01,994
I hate them. Do you smell pee?
40
00:05:02,835 --> 00:05:05,895
So, I had to figure it out on my own.
41
00:05:06,072 --> 00:05:10,338
I examined every possibility and
arrived at the most logical conclusion.
42
00:05:10,543 --> 00:05:12,443
Will you be my baby-daddy?
43
00:05:13,613 --> 00:05:16,707
What? No, I can't be the father.
Are you out of your mind?
44
00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:19,374
What are you talking...?
No. I am in my sexual prime.
45
00:05:19,552 --> 00:05:23,545
I have more women to bed before I do
something as idiotic as having a baby.
46
00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:26,715
Clive, you're my friend.
Don't you want to help me?
47
00:05:26,893 --> 00:05:30,294
We don't have to have sex.
You don't have to be involved at all.
48
00:05:30,463 --> 00:05:33,523
All right? Just give me your sperm.
49
00:05:35,568 --> 00:05:39,470
Okay. Okay,
you're feeling lonely, right?
50
00:05:39,639 --> 00:05:41,607
Maybe a little dead down there.
51
00:05:41,774 --> 00:05:45,073
I get it, I get it. Been a long time
since you've had, you know.
52
00:05:45,244 --> 00:05:46,268
Just shut up, okay?
53
00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:48,710
- Just forget it. Forget the whole thing!
- What?
54
00:05:48,881 --> 00:05:50,974
Well, that was a bust.
55
00:05:51,150 --> 00:05:55,780
So I took life by the horns...
56
00:05:55,955 --> 00:05:59,789
...and I did what I had to do.
57
00:06:00,159 --> 00:06:01,751
Yeah.
58
00:06:03,262 --> 00:06:05,093
It's gonna be okay.
59
00:06:06,432 --> 00:06:07,922
I have a plan.
60
00:06:10,636 --> 00:06:12,228
Ding.
61
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:18,975
- You don't have to walk like that.
- What? Oh, okay.
62
00:06:19,145 --> 00:06:22,581
By the way, I know an excellent
support group for single moms...
63
00:06:22,749 --> 00:06:26,276
...if you're interested.
- Great. Great.
64
00:06:26,452 --> 00:06:29,751
Maybe we should hug. We might
have just made a baby together.
65
00:06:31,190 --> 00:06:34,091
- Good luck.
- Okay. All right.
66
00:06:37,630 --> 00:06:38,654
Hi.
67
00:06:38,831 --> 00:06:39,991
- Hi.
- Hi.
68
00:06:52,011 --> 00:06:54,502
- Hi!
- Get away from me!
69
00:07:00,019 --> 00:07:01,111
Taxi!
70
00:07:09,729 --> 00:07:11,356
Hallelujah!
71
00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:14,963
Excuse me. This is my cab.
72
00:07:15,134 --> 00:07:17,728
- What, you own it?
- No, but I'm about to rent it.
73
00:07:18,471 --> 00:07:22,703
If someone hails a cab and it pulls up,
you can't jump in and say it's yours.
74
00:07:22,875 --> 00:07:25,002
- I didn't see you.
- I saw you see me.
75
00:07:26,045 --> 00:07:29,481
Sir. Sir, excuse me.
Who saw you first?
76
00:07:33,252 --> 00:07:36,346
Look, maybe you're not
from around here, but there's a code.
77
00:07:36,556 --> 00:07:39,889
- Certain rules that we try to follow.
- Fine! Forget it. I'll get out.
78
00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:43,256
You're not right, but I'm in
a terrific mood and you're ruining it.
79
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:45,158
No, I'll get out.
80
00:07:47,233 --> 00:07:49,030
- Now what?
- I don't know. You tell me.
81
00:07:49,202 --> 00:07:52,399
- Hey, hey!
- Where's he going? Come back!
82
00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:58,443
Well, that was stupid.
Why'd you get out, you stupid-head?
83
00:07:58,611 --> 00:08:01,842
You said you were in a great mood
and I was ruining it. I felt bad.
84
00:08:02,014 --> 00:08:05,006
I'm sorry,
did you just call me a stupid-head?
85
00:08:21,133 --> 00:08:23,192
How's your great mood now?
86
00:08:23,369 --> 00:08:25,929
Please, stop talking to me.
87
00:08:28,641 --> 00:08:31,804
So why are you in
such a good mood anyway?
88
00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:35,105
Not that it's your business,
but good things are happening to me.
89
00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:37,579
Wow, that's great.
I hope it continues.
90
00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:41,152
Thanks.
91
00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:45,284
Well, have a nice life.
And try not to steal any more cabs.
92
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:47,083
Yeah, you do the same.
93
00:08:49,161 --> 00:08:51,925
Hey, there's a penny right there.
94
00:08:52,098 --> 00:08:54,157
Why don't you pick it up?
It's good luck.
95
00:08:55,167 --> 00:08:56,634
Only if it's heads.
96
00:08:59,939 --> 00:09:02,669
Now somebody else
can have good luck. Bye.
97
00:09:03,409 --> 00:09:04,899
Bye.
98
00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:39,371
Thank you for coming to
Hudson Mutts.
99
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,012
Hi, Nutsy!
100
00:09:41,180 --> 00:09:43,148
Oh, my God. You're glowing.
101
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,477
- Hello.
- Oh, my God. She's glowing, right?
102
00:09:45,651 --> 00:09:47,619
- Tell us everything.
- Not much to tell.
103
00:09:47,787 --> 00:09:49,948
You got shot up with red-headed
freckle sperm.
104
00:09:50,122 --> 00:09:51,350
There's something to tell.
105
00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:53,822
He had red hair and freckles?
Why'd you do that?
106
00:09:53,993 --> 00:09:55,961
- Tried to talk her out of it.
- Red pubes.
107
00:09:56,128 --> 00:09:58,221
Never saw his pubes.
It was a vial of semen.
108
00:09:58,397 --> 00:10:00,695
So come on, what happened?
109
00:10:00,866 --> 00:10:02,993
I lay down,
put my feet over my head.
110
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:05,899
Five minutes later, it was over.
I barely felt a thing.
111
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:09,131
So basically,
it was like having sex with Clive.
112
00:10:09,308 --> 00:10:12,209
- You wish.
- I'll be in the back, legs over my head.
113
00:10:12,378 --> 00:10:14,608
- Red hair and freckles!
- You had your chance!
114
00:10:17,750 --> 00:10:19,547
- What?
- I don't know. It's just weird.
115
00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:21,687
Who is this guy
she was with anyway?
116
00:10:21,854 --> 00:10:23,446
She wasn't actually with him.
117
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:26,490
Yeah, but I still want to kick his ass.
Is that wrong?
118
00:10:26,659 --> 00:10:28,251
You're stupid.
119
00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:54,085
Okay, all right.
120
00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:57,915
Welcome to
Single Mothers and Proud.
121
00:10:58,157 --> 00:11:02,719
As the name suggests,
we are all single, mothers...
122
00:11:03,729 --> 00:11:05,287
...and proud.
123
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:06,897
Hey, all right.
124
00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:08,624
Okay. Some of us have adopted.
125
00:11:08,801 --> 00:11:11,292
Some of us have conceived
with a donor.
126
00:11:11,470 --> 00:11:14,928
Every story is different, but
with the same common denominator.
127
00:11:15,174 --> 00:11:18,769
We wanted a child,
and we made it happen on our own.
128
00:11:18,944 --> 00:11:20,605
We sure did. We sure did.
129
00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:25,740
Are you already a single mother
or are you trying to become one?
130
00:11:25,918 --> 00:11:28,716
Oh, I was just inseminated
a few days ago.
131
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:32,982
Inseminated. Makes me feel
like a cow or something.
132
00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:38,289
Well, we do what we have to do
when we don't have a penis partner.
133
00:11:38,464 --> 00:11:41,592
- That's right.
- So let's hear about you.
134
00:11:41,801 --> 00:11:46,898
Oh, okay. Let's see.
Well, I own a pet store.
135
00:11:47,606 --> 00:11:52,600
Yeah. I used to work in the corporate
world, which was great for a while...
136
00:11:52,778 --> 00:11:55,975
...but it just didn't feel like the life
that I wanted to live.
137
00:11:56,148 --> 00:12:02,781
So now I'm happy on the work front,
but you know.
138
00:12:02,955 --> 00:12:05,719
I don't know.
Even though I have more balance...
139
00:12:05,925 --> 00:12:07,620
...it's personal.
140
00:12:07,827 --> 00:12:11,422
I still haven't found "the one,"
so that's why I'm...
141
00:12:11,630 --> 00:12:14,326
Well, the elusive one.
142
00:12:14,500 --> 00:12:15,762
- Good luck.
- Yeah, right.
143
00:12:15,935 --> 00:12:18,130
If I had a dollar for every time
I heard that.
144
00:12:18,304 --> 00:12:20,795
I thought I'd be married with kids
by now...
145
00:12:20,973 --> 00:12:23,806
...but that's just not happening...
146
00:12:24,510 --> 00:12:28,310
...so I guess it's time for
my backup plan. So...
147
00:12:28,481 --> 00:12:31,507
Well, Zoe, listen.
If you really want a baby...
148
00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:34,778
...we here at
Single Mothers and Proud...
149
00:12:36,689 --> 00:12:37,986
...can be your partners.
150
00:12:38,157 --> 00:12:41,888
From inception to graduation,
everything in between.
151
00:12:42,061 --> 00:12:43,551
We can be here for you.
152
00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:47,898
Great.
153
00:12:48,067 --> 00:12:49,193
Thank you.
154
00:12:49,368 --> 00:12:51,802
Dakota was born right here.
155
00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:53,768
In this very room.
156
00:12:54,373 --> 00:12:57,137
- Right where you're sitting, actually.
- Really?
157
00:12:58,644 --> 00:13:00,236
Right here?
158
00:13:00,412 --> 00:13:03,040
Lmagine that. Funny.
159
00:13:03,215 --> 00:13:05,342
So how old is your baby now?
160
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:07,582
I'm 3.
161
00:13:09,522 --> 00:13:11,513
So cute.
162
00:13:12,591 --> 00:13:14,491
Why do you need a support group?
163
00:13:14,660 --> 00:13:16,753
- You're not very supportive.
- What?
164
00:13:16,929 --> 00:13:18,897
You just told me that if
I breast-feed...
165
00:13:19,064 --> 00:13:22,500
...my girls are gonna wind up
looking like empty tube socks.
166
00:13:22,668 --> 00:13:24,693
Hey, I'm just being honest.
167
00:13:24,870 --> 00:13:29,170
Don't even get me started on
what childbirth does to your bladder.
168
00:13:29,575 --> 00:13:31,839
What does it do to your bladder?
169
00:13:34,013 --> 00:13:36,675
I think I just peed a little bit.
170
00:13:38,050 --> 00:13:41,213
I don't think I'm pregnant anyway.
Doctor says it takes a few tries.
171
00:13:41,387 --> 00:13:43,912
Something about frozen sperm
being lazy.
172
00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:45,590
Oh, come with me for a minute.
173
00:13:45,758 --> 00:13:49,558
I have to make some muffins for some
bullshit teacher-appreciation day.
174
00:13:49,728 --> 00:13:52,959
- You're gonna make muffins?
- Oh, hell, no.
175
00:13:53,132 --> 00:13:55,100
But there's a place here
that sells them.
176
00:13:55,267 --> 00:13:58,703
I pick out the worst ones
and I pretend I made them.
177
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:01,364
Come on.
178
00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:02,107
Okay, which is the ugliest?
179
00:14:02,107 --> 00:14:04,473
Okay, which is the ugliest?
180
00:14:04,643 --> 00:14:07,043
Seems like a lot of trouble
for something trivial.
181
00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:08,908
Welcome to motherhood.
182
00:14:25,464 --> 00:14:28,490
- There's that guy.
- What guy?
183
00:14:28,667 --> 00:14:31,500
The one selling cheese. I know him.
184
00:14:31,737 --> 00:14:33,227
He's hot.
185
00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:38,832
- He sells cheese?
- You sell hamsters.
186
00:14:39,011 --> 00:14:42,947
- Can I help you ladies?
- No. We're good, thank you.
187
00:14:45,117 --> 00:14:46,482
Like what you see?
188
00:14:47,386 --> 00:14:50,116
- What?
- Just talking about the muffins.
189
00:14:50,522 --> 00:14:52,285
- Hey, you.
- Hey.
190
00:14:53,759 --> 00:14:57,752
Hi. What a nice surprise.
How did you know I worked here?
191
00:14:58,664 --> 00:14:59,756
I didn't.
192
00:15:00,699 --> 00:15:02,257
Oh, okay.
193
00:15:02,434 --> 00:15:04,334
Did you follow me here?
194
00:15:04,503 --> 00:15:06,368
Follow you?
195
00:15:06,538 --> 00:15:09,132
To the farmers' market?
Are you kidding me?
196
00:15:09,308 --> 00:15:12,766
No, we came to buy muffins.
You were here. Tell him.
197
00:15:12,945 --> 00:15:15,641
You better buy something.
You ate all my samples.
198
00:15:16,682 --> 00:15:21,142
Well, it's really nice to see you,
but I never got your name. I'm Stan.
199
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:23,545
- Oh, Zoe.
- Zoe.
200
00:15:23,722 --> 00:15:26,190
I'm Mona. So how do you two
not know each other?
201
00:15:26,358 --> 00:15:28,326
- He stole my cab.
- She stole my cab.
202
00:15:30,362 --> 00:15:31,454
Okay.
203
00:15:33,432 --> 00:15:35,059
We should go.
204
00:15:35,234 --> 00:15:37,532
- We should?
- Yeah, we have that important thing.
205
00:15:37,703 --> 00:15:39,603
Can your thing wait
just a few minutes?
206
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:41,501
I'll give you a taste of my cheese.
207
00:15:44,543 --> 00:15:46,340
I can rephrase that.
208
00:15:46,545 --> 00:15:49,070
Okay. This is our basic chèvre.
209
00:15:49,315 --> 00:15:53,445
Probably our best seller and the
cheese that started it all, as they say.
210
00:15:53,652 --> 00:15:56,849
These are our surface-ripened
cheeses. These are fantastic.
211
00:15:57,022 --> 00:16:00,890
And these are the aged
raw-milk cheeses. Now...
212
00:16:03,595 --> 00:16:05,859
This is really boring, isn't it?
213
00:16:06,031 --> 00:16:07,726
- No.
- Yes.
214
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:10,465
This is Louie. He works for me.
215
00:16:11,070 --> 00:16:12,264
- Hi.
- Hi. Zoe.
216
00:16:12,471 --> 00:16:13,495
- Zoe.
- Mona.
217
00:16:13,672 --> 00:16:16,163
- Can I give you a sample box?
- Oh, yeah.
218
00:16:16,342 --> 00:16:17,707
- I'm okay.
- We're okay.
219
00:16:17,876 --> 00:16:20,606
You're not lactose intolerant,
are you? I hate that.
220
00:16:20,779 --> 00:16:23,009
Hey. You're still coming over tonight,
right?
221
00:16:25,250 --> 00:16:26,911
Yeah. Yeah.
222
00:16:28,854 --> 00:16:30,253
We should go.
223
00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:33,221
- Are you ready?
- I want a sample box.
224
00:16:33,392 --> 00:16:35,986
Okay. Well, I gotta go. Bye.
225
00:16:37,796 --> 00:16:39,423
Bye.
226
00:16:41,633 --> 00:16:43,294
Bye.
227
00:16:44,136 --> 00:16:46,036
- You said free sample box, right?
- Yes.
228
00:16:46,205 --> 00:16:47,365
- Free? Okay.
- Absolutely.
229
00:16:47,539 --> 00:16:49,608
In that case...
230
00:16:58,450 --> 00:17:00,611
Okay, spill it.
Who is he, what does he do...
231
00:17:00,786 --> 00:17:02,720
...how do we know him?
- Who?
232
00:17:02,888 --> 00:17:06,824
Stan from the farmers' market.
He's called twice already.
233
00:17:07,593 --> 00:17:08,651
I'm gonna kill Mona.
234
00:17:09,061 --> 00:17:10,756
Is he a farmer?
235
00:17:13,165 --> 00:17:15,827
- He makes cheese.
- He's a Pilgrim?
236
00:17:16,068 --> 00:17:17,831
Mona said his feta was incredible.
237
00:17:18,070 --> 00:17:19,662
That makes so much
more sense now.
238
00:17:19,838 --> 00:17:21,169
Who is this guy?
239
00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:23,467
He's nobody. He's just some guy.
240
00:17:23,642 --> 00:17:26,509
- Are you blushing?
- You're totally blushing.
241
00:17:26,678 --> 00:17:28,839
Can we calm down,
get ready for the book signing?
242
00:17:29,014 --> 00:17:30,106
- No.
- This is exciting.
243
00:17:30,282 --> 00:17:31,340
I'm not calming down.
244
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:34,519
He's nobody. And even if
he was somebody, it doesn't matter...
245
00:17:34,686 --> 00:17:37,621
...because I don't want
to be with anybody. Okay?
246
00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:39,781
So let's just get back to work.
247
00:17:40,426 --> 00:17:43,953
- Finding a relationship is work.
- I don't want a relationship.
248
00:17:44,997 --> 00:17:46,965
Well, it is.
249
00:17:47,132 --> 00:17:48,861
Yo, taxi.
250
00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:51,832
So dogs have
an ingrained pack mentality.
251
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:54,165
If we don't assert leadership
over our dogs...
252
00:17:54,339 --> 00:17:55,897
...our dogs are going to show...
253
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,543
...unstable behavior
or dominant behavior.
254
00:17:58,710 --> 00:18:01,270
In other words, in the dog world...
255
00:18:01,447 --> 00:18:04,610
...who you are is stable or
unstable energy, leader or a follower.
256
00:18:04,783 --> 00:18:08,776
So when a dog introduces himself
to another dog, what do they do?
257
00:18:10,389 --> 00:18:12,983
Exactly.
When a human wants to meet a dog:
258
00:18:13,158 --> 00:18:16,059
"Oh, my God, he's so..."
259
00:18:16,228 --> 00:18:19,595
So I mean, it's like, poor dog,
you know?
260
00:18:20,799 --> 00:18:24,530
And so they're interacting based
on energy and also the nose...
261
00:18:24,703 --> 00:18:26,227
Okay. Now this is getting weird.
262
00:18:26,405 --> 00:18:29,203
I know. We keep running into
each other. It's crazy.
263
00:18:29,374 --> 00:18:31,672
So your being here
is just another coincidence?
264
00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:34,711
- Oh, no. I love this guy.
- Don't you have someplace...
265
00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:36,814
...to be tonight?
- Not till later.
266
00:18:36,982 --> 00:18:38,142
Do you even have a dog?
267
00:18:38,317 --> 00:18:42,481
No. But I might get one
now that I can "be the pack leader."
268
00:18:42,654 --> 00:18:45,646
The dogs would just shake it.
"Do you want to play again?"
269
00:18:46,225 --> 00:18:48,750
- I'm really busy here.
- You have a boyfriend.
270
00:18:48,927 --> 00:18:50,554
- Just tell me. I can take it.
- No.
271
00:18:50,729 --> 00:18:52,856
You just know
you're not interested in me?
272
00:18:53,031 --> 00:18:55,898
You're making a big mistake.
I'm very interesting.
273
00:18:56,735 --> 00:18:59,067
I'm just not interested in men
right now, okay?
274
00:18:59,238 --> 00:19:02,401
- Oh, you're gay?
- I'm not gay.
275
00:19:02,941 --> 00:19:04,101
- Quiet.
- Hey, you two.
276
00:19:04,276 --> 00:19:05,903
Would you please take it outside?
277
00:19:06,078 --> 00:19:07,943
- Sorry.
- Okay, sorry about that.
278
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:10,012
- That was awkward.
- Yeah.
279
00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:15,011
This is not a good time for me, okay?
I'm going through some changes.
280
00:19:15,187 --> 00:19:16,518
Menopause?
281
00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:19,088
Menopause? Seriously?
282
00:19:19,258 --> 00:19:20,520
How old do you think I am?
283
00:19:20,692 --> 00:19:22,057
Let's start over.
284
00:19:22,227 --> 00:19:25,025
The more I think about it,
we'd never make it as a couple.
285
00:19:25,197 --> 00:19:27,222
You're too skeptical.
We should be friends.
286
00:19:27,399 --> 00:19:29,890
- I have enough friends.
- You can never have too many.
287
00:19:30,068 --> 00:19:33,037
- What you doing tonight?
- Getting takeout, going to bed.
288
00:19:33,205 --> 00:19:35,730
Clearly, you don't have
that many friends.
289
00:19:36,241 --> 00:19:37,765
Okay, here's my proposition.
290
00:19:37,943 --> 00:19:40,639
Don't freak out.
It requires very little commitment.
291
00:19:40,812 --> 00:19:44,407
I'm getting takeout too. Let's walk
together to the same place...
292
00:19:44,583 --> 00:19:48,485
...order and pay for our own respective
meals, and then we'll say goodbye.
293
00:19:48,687 --> 00:19:50,587
Where do you want to go?
294
00:19:57,362 --> 00:19:58,624
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
295
00:19:58,797 --> 00:20:02,255
No fair. You chose this place
because it takes like two seconds.
296
00:20:02,434 --> 00:20:04,732
No, I chose it because it's the best.
297
00:20:04,903 --> 00:20:08,896
I want to see you take a bite of that.
I don't believe you're gonna eat it.
298
00:20:09,841 --> 00:20:11,103
Fine.
299
00:20:15,447 --> 00:20:17,608
There. Happy now?
300
00:20:18,016 --> 00:20:20,109
You have no idea how good this is.
301
00:20:20,285 --> 00:20:23,448
Lived in New York your whole life,
never gone to Gray's Papaya.
302
00:20:23,622 --> 00:20:26,648
- What's wrong with you?
- I haven't lived here my whole life.
303
00:20:26,825 --> 00:20:30,488
We moved out of the city
when my parents bought the farm.
304
00:20:31,363 --> 00:20:35,595
No, not died. They actually bought
a farm and we moved upstate.
305
00:20:35,934 --> 00:20:39,597
They retired to Phoenix five years
ago, and I run the place now.
306
00:20:39,771 --> 00:20:41,534
What about your family?
307
00:20:42,374 --> 00:20:44,706
Actually, my parents died
when I was young.
308
00:20:44,876 --> 00:20:47,709
It's just me
and my grandmother now.
309
00:20:47,879 --> 00:20:52,316
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
- It's okay. It was a long time ago.
310
00:20:52,484 --> 00:20:53,951
Look, I really have to go.
311
00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:57,987
All right. But I can't let you
walk home alone...
312
00:20:58,156 --> 00:21:01,182
...because this is
a very dangerous neighborhood.
313
00:21:08,567 --> 00:21:10,467
What school did you go to?
314
00:21:10,636 --> 00:21:12,126
Well, I kind of dropped out.
315
00:21:12,304 --> 00:21:15,330
I met this Swedish girl
during my semester abroad and...
316
00:21:15,540 --> 00:21:18,976
Let me guess.
You fell in love and got married.
317
00:21:19,144 --> 00:21:22,671
- And started an inn in Vermont.
- Of course.
318
00:21:22,848 --> 00:21:26,181
It lasted like three seconds.
I didn't know how to run an inn.
319
00:21:26,351 --> 00:21:30,048
And she didn't know how not to sleep
with everyone who worked there...
320
00:21:30,222 --> 00:21:32,884
...so we got divorced.
Yeah, she took everything.
321
00:21:33,058 --> 00:21:36,494
I had to move back in with
my parents, work myself out of debt...
322
00:21:36,662 --> 00:21:39,995
...and figure out how not to blame
every woman on the planet...
323
00:21:40,165 --> 00:21:41,598
...for Ana's whorish ways.
324
00:21:41,767 --> 00:21:45,498
- How's that going?
- Not so good.
325
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,908
Okay, I want to know everything.
326
00:21:51,743 --> 00:21:53,370
First kiss?
327
00:21:54,546 --> 00:21:58,243
Some jerk with a dirt bike
and chapped lips.
328
00:21:58,417 --> 00:21:59,441
You?
329
00:21:59,618 --> 00:22:02,917
Seventh grade. She wore braces
and headgear. It was terrifying.
330
00:22:03,088 --> 00:22:04,521
Ouch.
331
00:22:05,424 --> 00:22:08,723
Hey. Look.
332
00:22:09,861 --> 00:22:11,522
- Here's one for you.
- That's weird.
333
00:22:15,701 --> 00:22:17,760
Okay, best kiss?
334
00:22:20,205 --> 00:22:21,536
That's a tough one.
335
00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:26,734
Because if we weren't just friends,
I'd kiss you right now.
336
00:22:26,912 --> 00:22:28,743
Then I'd be your best kiss.
337
00:22:30,148 --> 00:22:31,479
How do you know?
338
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:34,910
I know.
339
00:22:47,232 --> 00:22:49,462
Is someone looking for you?
340
00:22:51,737 --> 00:22:53,932
Yeah. I have to go.
341
00:22:54,740 --> 00:22:57,140
- Okay.
- Okay.
342
00:22:59,411 --> 00:23:02,869
- Bye.
- Bye. I'll call you.
343
00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:12,687
- You think it was the muffin girl?
- I guess. I don't know.
344
00:23:12,891 --> 00:23:14,518
Why do I even care?
345
00:23:15,494 --> 00:23:17,018
You like him!
346
00:23:17,262 --> 00:23:19,753
Oh, God. What if I'm pregnant?
347
00:23:19,931 --> 00:23:22,798
- Then it'll work out perfectly.
- What do you mean?
348
00:23:23,001 --> 00:23:25,799
Because if you really like him,
as soon as that happens...
349
00:23:25,971 --> 00:23:28,769
...you'll break up with him,
because you're pregnant.
350
00:23:28,940 --> 00:23:32,068
You won't have to put
yourself out there, possibly get hurt.
351
00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:33,802
Hey, that's your dream.
352
00:23:33,979 --> 00:23:35,674
Be quiet.
353
00:23:35,847 --> 00:23:39,180
Besides, I'm not pregnant.
354
00:23:39,351 --> 00:23:41,512
And I'm okay on my own.
355
00:23:41,686 --> 00:23:43,176
Are you gonna see him again?
356
00:23:45,690 --> 00:23:47,851
Yeah, I think so.
357
00:24:00,071 --> 00:24:01,299
No.
358
00:24:04,643 --> 00:24:06,838
Not gonna happen, Nutsy.
359
00:24:11,550 --> 00:24:12,983
Hello.
360
00:24:13,518 --> 00:24:15,486
Oh, Stan.
361
00:24:35,874 --> 00:24:37,466
Go away.
362
00:24:42,747 --> 00:24:46,080
Stop it! You're making me nervous.
363
00:25:05,437 --> 00:25:07,769
You're early. I'll be a minute, okay?
364
00:25:09,508 --> 00:25:11,237
Three to five minutes, actually.
365
00:25:13,445 --> 00:25:17,074
- You want a beer?
- Yeah, sure. You want one?
366
00:25:19,918 --> 00:25:21,215
- I'll let you know.
- Okay.
367
00:25:22,587 --> 00:25:25,385
Oh, my God. Is he okay?
368
00:25:25,557 --> 00:25:28,822
He's fine. Happens all the time.
369
00:25:29,794 --> 00:25:31,284
Go.
370
00:25:33,231 --> 00:25:36,758
- I'm sorry. Can you give me a minute?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
371
00:25:36,935 --> 00:25:38,596
Okay, good.
372
00:25:43,408 --> 00:25:44,841
Damn it, Nuts.
373
00:25:46,478 --> 00:25:49,447
Give me that. Give it to me.
374
00:25:49,614 --> 00:25:50,842
Let go.
375
00:25:52,350 --> 00:25:55,751
Let go right now!
376
00:25:55,921 --> 00:25:58,754
- Zoe, everything okay?
- Yeah.
377
00:25:58,957 --> 00:26:01,482
You know, just showing him
who's the pack leader.
378
00:26:08,099 --> 00:26:09,430
You idiot!
379
00:26:11,836 --> 00:26:14,669
You better not swallow that thing.
Give it to me. Nutsy.
380
00:26:14,839 --> 00:26:17,205
Open. Open.
381
00:26:19,110 --> 00:26:19,144
- You look really pretty tonight.
- Thank you.
382
00:26:19,144 --> 00:26:21,442
- You look really pretty tonight.
- Thank you.
383
00:26:21,613 --> 00:26:26,016
I mean, you always look really pretty,
but tonight you look especially pretty.
384
00:26:26,518 --> 00:26:28,782
And that dress is...
385
00:26:28,954 --> 00:26:30,285
It's really something.
386
00:26:30,522 --> 00:26:32,956
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
387
00:26:34,893 --> 00:26:37,828
Did you buy a new dress
for our date tonight?
388
00:26:37,996 --> 00:26:40,726
- Don't flatter yourself.
- I'll take that as a yes.
389
00:26:40,899 --> 00:26:44,232
- I guess you'll never know.
- I guess not.
390
00:26:47,472 --> 00:26:50,703
- Except you left the price tag on.
- What?
391
00:26:51,910 --> 00:26:53,309
Allow me.
392
00:26:55,513 --> 00:26:56,844
I got it.
393
00:27:09,394 --> 00:27:13,660
I've had this dress for a long time.
It's just I haven't worn it yet...
394
00:27:13,832 --> 00:27:15,857
...so that's why the tag was still on.
395
00:27:17,168 --> 00:27:18,658
You're not that special.
396
00:27:20,505 --> 00:27:21,665
Really?
397
00:27:48,867 --> 00:27:50,061
Look at this place.
398
00:27:50,869 --> 00:27:53,633
- I don't know what to say.
- Finally.
399
00:27:53,805 --> 00:27:57,263
- What's that supposed to mean?
- It means, "Good, don't say anything."
400
00:27:57,442 --> 00:28:00,809
You don't have to say anything.
Just come over here, sit down.
401
00:28:00,979 --> 00:28:03,880
- What, you think I talk too much?
- I did not say that.
402
00:28:04,049 --> 00:28:06,279
- What did you say?
- Just you're very quick.
403
00:28:06,451 --> 00:28:09,181
You always have a response
for things, which I like.
404
00:28:09,354 --> 00:28:11,754
But tonight, just, you know,
be surprised.
405
00:28:22,300 --> 00:28:23,392
Surprise.
406
00:28:26,738 --> 00:28:28,228
You're good.
407
00:28:28,406 --> 00:28:31,534
You worked for an Internet
company? I don't see that at all.
408
00:28:31,710 --> 00:28:34,304
I was very important.
You would've been impressed.
409
00:28:34,479 --> 00:28:37,141
Really?
How did you get the pet store?
410
00:28:38,116 --> 00:28:40,084
Actually, it was through my dog,
Nuts.
411
00:28:40,251 --> 00:28:42,742
I bought him at this fancy pet store
near my house.
412
00:28:42,954 --> 00:28:46,651
Cutest puppy you have ever seen.
Six months later, he almost dies.
413
00:28:46,825 --> 00:28:49,385
Turns out he was from
one of those puppy mills...
414
00:28:49,561 --> 00:28:52,291
...where dogs are so inbred,
he was kind of falling apart.
415
00:28:52,464 --> 00:28:55,160
What did you do?
Did you sue them?
416
00:28:55,333 --> 00:28:57,233
I thought about it. Then I thought:
417
00:28:57,402 --> 00:29:00,132
"What good would that do?
They'll still sell inbred dogs."
418
00:29:00,305 --> 00:29:01,329
So I quit my job...
419
00:29:01,506 --> 00:29:04,771
...and I took the stock-option money
over to the pet store...
420
00:29:04,943 --> 00:29:06,808
...and I bought it.
421
00:29:08,446 --> 00:29:11,438
I know how to milk a goat.
Does that do anything for you?
422
00:29:13,151 --> 00:29:14,778
No, not really.
423
00:29:16,654 --> 00:29:18,986
Can I ask you a serious question,
Zoe?
424
00:29:19,691 --> 00:29:21,181
What?
425
00:29:26,765 --> 00:29:29,233
Did you buy that dress
to wear for me tonight?
426
00:29:43,715 --> 00:29:45,182
I will never tell.
427
00:29:47,185 --> 00:29:49,050
Really? Because...
428
00:29:52,323 --> 00:29:55,349
...I have ways of making you talk.
429
00:30:07,539 --> 00:30:10,940
- Let me get that. Let me get that.
- My dress! I got it.
430
00:30:11,176 --> 00:30:14,373
There's a hose over there
behind the fence.
431
00:30:15,713 --> 00:30:19,114
You see it? Get the hose.
432
00:30:33,865 --> 00:30:36,766
- Okay, this is war.
- What? No!
433
00:30:36,935 --> 00:30:39,460
Okay, hand it over. Hand it over!
434
00:30:47,245 --> 00:30:49,873
- It was mean.
- You weren't even pointing at the fire.
435
00:30:50,048 --> 00:30:52,414
- You just soaked me.
- You were pointing at my face.
436
00:30:52,584 --> 00:30:54,745
But I wasn't trying to soak you.
I swear!
437
00:30:54,919 --> 00:30:56,784
Oh, whatever!
I looked into your eyes...
438
00:30:56,955 --> 00:30:59,890
...and I saw you had this crazy look,
like a crazy person.
439
00:31:00,058 --> 00:31:02,424
- That's not true.
- It is true. You know what else?
440
00:31:02,627 --> 00:31:07,428
I think I owe you another dress. And I
definitely owe you another date.
441
00:31:08,933 --> 00:31:10,127
I'd like that.
442
00:31:10,935 --> 00:31:13,802
Why don't you come to the farm
with me next weekend?
443
00:31:17,909 --> 00:31:19,570
I'll call you.
444
00:31:19,744 --> 00:31:21,109
I'll wait by the phone.
445
00:31:38,496 --> 00:31:39,690
What?
446
00:32:18,169 --> 00:32:20,137
Holy shit!
447
00:32:21,372 --> 00:32:23,533
- I know.
- Are you sure?
448
00:32:23,708 --> 00:32:25,300
If I'm not, then my dog is.
449
00:32:25,476 --> 00:32:28,138
You're not making any sense.
You're definitely pregnant.
450
00:32:28,846 --> 00:32:31,838
- Congratulations! How are we feeling?
- We're freaking out!
451
00:32:32,016 --> 00:32:34,075
- What she said.
- Why?
452
00:32:34,252 --> 00:32:36,413
We performed an inter-uterine
insemination...
453
00:32:36,587 --> 00:32:38,555
...using sperm that you purchased.
454
00:32:38,723 --> 00:32:41,021
This isn't exactly
what we call an accident.
455
00:32:42,393 --> 00:32:45,385
It's just happening so fast.
456
00:32:45,563 --> 00:32:48,896
Keep breathing. Pump those arms.
457
00:32:49,067 --> 00:32:51,035
What did you all eat last night?
458
00:32:51,202 --> 00:32:53,762
- Hey, Arthur.
- Well, hello, my dear.
459
00:32:53,972 --> 00:32:55,803
Oh, no, no, no,
don't get up. It's okay.
460
00:32:55,974 --> 00:32:57,236
I can't get up.
461
00:32:57,408 --> 00:33:00,206
- Came to see my lovely fiancée?
- Yes.
462
00:33:00,411 --> 00:33:04,507
Oh, she's looking fine today,
let me tell you. Just fine.
463
00:33:04,749 --> 00:33:06,114
- Hi, sweetheart.
- Hey.
464
00:33:06,284 --> 00:33:08,616
- Baby.
- Hey. I need to talk to you.
465
00:33:08,786 --> 00:33:11,220
- Sure.
- Alone.
466
00:33:11,389 --> 00:33:12,856
Shirley.
467
00:33:13,024 --> 00:33:16,118
Don't worry about them.
They can't hear anything anyway.
468
00:33:17,628 --> 00:33:20,426
- I'm pregnant.
- What?
469
00:33:20,999 --> 00:33:23,900
- I'm pregnant.
- What?
470
00:33:25,069 --> 00:33:27,060
- I'm pregnant.
- I can't hear you, darling.
471
00:33:27,238 --> 00:33:31,368
Oh, Jesus, Judy! She's pregnant.
Turn up your hearing aid.
472
00:33:35,246 --> 00:33:38,147
I'm confused.
You said this is what you wanted.
473
00:33:39,650 --> 00:33:43,142
But this guy, he's special. And now
the whole thing's gonna fall apart.
474
00:33:43,621 --> 00:33:45,486
What makes him so special?
475
00:33:45,656 --> 00:33:51,094
I don't know. He's very real.
And funny.
476
00:33:52,063 --> 00:33:53,121
And different.
477
00:33:54,899 --> 00:33:56,730
I like him, Nana.
478
00:33:57,935 --> 00:33:59,129
What should I do?
479
00:34:00,805 --> 00:34:02,033
Zoe.
480
00:34:04,542 --> 00:34:07,773
You always get ahead of yourself.
You barely know him.
481
00:34:07,945 --> 00:34:12,348
Spend some time with him.
See what he's really like.
482
00:34:13,117 --> 00:34:16,985
He could be a total douche bag
and then the whole thing is moot.
483
00:34:17,188 --> 00:34:20,123
Yeah. Yeah.
484
00:34:23,561 --> 00:34:25,961
- Maybe he is a douche bag.
- Oh, come on.
485
00:34:26,164 --> 00:34:29,600
You think he'd ask you away for
the weekend if he had a girlfriend?
486
00:34:29,767 --> 00:34:33,965
There's no way he's dating
that muffin bitch, Zoe. Trust me.
487
00:34:34,138 --> 00:34:36,766
Who can say?
Maybe he's looking to get laid.
488
00:34:36,941 --> 00:34:38,932
Oh, well,
don't have sex with him, okay?
489
00:34:39,110 --> 00:34:41,510
That will really complicate things.
490
00:34:41,679 --> 00:34:43,044
- I know.
- It'll be hard...
491
00:34:43,214 --> 00:34:46,445
...with three times the amount of
blood coursing through your body.
492
00:34:46,617 --> 00:34:48,710
- Excuse me?
- Oh, yeah.
493
00:34:49,153 --> 00:34:52,122
That's why pregnant women
are so horny all the time.
494
00:34:52,290 --> 00:34:55,157
Is that what it is?
I thought it was me.
495
00:34:55,359 --> 00:34:59,523
Oh, no. When I was pregnant,
my whole body was so sensitive...
496
00:34:59,697 --> 00:35:01,722
...I could have an orgasm
sitting on a bus.
497
00:35:01,899 --> 00:35:04,390
- I think I'm gonna be sick.
- Me too.
498
00:35:04,635 --> 00:35:06,728
Why? It's a happy story.
499
00:35:07,505 --> 00:35:10,497
- All right, I'm just gonna go up there...
- Disgusting.
500
00:35:10,675 --> 00:35:14,042
...and tell him that I'm pregnant.
Just lay all my cards on the table.
501
00:35:14,212 --> 00:35:16,339
Okay, good.
Just don't lay on the table.
502
00:35:16,514 --> 00:35:19,383
Okay?
Because you cannot have sex.
503
00:35:41,906 --> 00:35:43,533
Don't look at me like that.
504
00:35:43,708 --> 00:35:45,938
I know. This is a big mess we're in.
505
00:35:46,711 --> 00:35:48,702
I'm gonna fix it.
506
00:35:53,417 --> 00:35:56,250
Shit. Here it is.
507
00:36:43,434 --> 00:36:45,425
Watch out for that tree.
508
00:36:46,003 --> 00:36:47,903
Yeah, thanks.
509
00:36:53,744 --> 00:36:55,644
- Hi.
- Hi.
510
00:36:57,582 --> 00:36:59,982
The tree should not be there.
All I'm gonna say.
511
00:37:00,218 --> 00:37:02,948
Whatever, Mrs. Magoo.
512
00:37:04,155 --> 00:37:06,089
- Come on. I'm glad you're here.
- Okay.
513
00:37:07,658 --> 00:37:09,421
Me too.
514
00:37:09,827 --> 00:37:11,351
Stan.
515
00:37:12,597 --> 00:37:14,588
There's something I need to tell you.
516
00:37:17,101 --> 00:37:18,659
I'm pregnant.
517
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:23,537
Yes, pregnant.
518
00:37:28,813 --> 00:37:32,305
Okay, maybe like:
519
00:37:35,152 --> 00:37:37,518
I'm gonna have a baby.
520
00:37:42,126 --> 00:37:43,991
I'm with child.
521
00:37:46,831 --> 00:37:49,061
Shit.
522
00:37:49,300 --> 00:37:50,324
Stan.
523
00:37:50,501 --> 00:37:52,526
Stan. Stan.
524
00:37:52,703 --> 00:37:55,035
I've been inseminated.
525
00:37:55,273 --> 00:37:58,709
Yes, inseminated.
526
00:37:59,910 --> 00:38:02,879
I'm gonna have a baby!
527
00:38:10,855 --> 00:38:12,288
Stan?
528
00:38:30,207 --> 00:38:32,607
Spoon, spoon.
529
00:39:04,475 --> 00:39:06,136
Would you like a plate?
530
00:39:11,082 --> 00:39:12,982
A napkin? Trough?
531
00:39:15,553 --> 00:39:18,488
- These are for you.
- That's so sweet. Thank you.
532
00:39:18,656 --> 00:39:19,714
You're welcome.
533
00:39:19,890 --> 00:39:21,255
You're good.
534
00:39:23,427 --> 00:39:24,895
Okay.
535
00:39:24,962 --> 00:39:27,396
It's just that stew was so delicious.
536
00:39:27,565 --> 00:39:29,260
I knew you'd like it.
537
00:39:29,433 --> 00:39:31,901
So, what's the next step
for a cheese farmer?
538
00:39:32,069 --> 00:39:33,161
Very funny.
539
00:39:34,138 --> 00:39:37,403
I want to start
a sustainable gourmet shop, okay?
540
00:39:37,575 --> 00:39:41,671
Cheese, wine, bread,
prepared foods, but everything local.
541
00:39:41,879 --> 00:39:46,475
Nothing from farther than 30 miles.
All based on the farmers' markets.
542
00:39:46,650 --> 00:39:48,641
- That's a good idea.
- Thank you very much.
543
00:39:49,286 --> 00:39:52,744
I'm good at ideas.
I'm just not good with follow-through.
544
00:39:52,923 --> 00:39:54,788
I wasn't good at marriage.
545
00:39:54,959 --> 00:39:57,621
I wasn't good at running
a bed-and-breakfast.
546
00:39:57,795 --> 00:40:00,161
Thank God we didn't have kids.
547
00:40:01,098 --> 00:40:03,589
- You don't want kids?
- I don't think so.
548
00:40:03,768 --> 00:40:05,201
Well, I don't know.
549
00:40:05,403 --> 00:40:09,464
For years, I never thought about
the future. I just lived in the moment.
550
00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:11,835
But maybe I'm different now.
551
00:40:12,042 --> 00:40:16,945
I really want to take the next step.
I really want to move on with my life.
552
00:40:17,114 --> 00:40:19,105
About the future.
553
00:40:20,017 --> 00:40:21,450
- Let's talk about that.
- Okay.
554
00:40:21,619 --> 00:40:24,918
Because the future is now.
555
00:40:25,723 --> 00:40:27,657
- Right?
- Right.
556
00:40:31,462 --> 00:40:33,692
There's something that
I need to tell you.
557
00:40:34,131 --> 00:40:35,496
Hold that thought.
558
00:40:36,167 --> 00:40:37,964
Come here.
559
00:40:52,850 --> 00:40:55,045
- I want to show you something.
- What is it?
560
00:40:55,219 --> 00:40:57,414
- It's cheese.
- I can see that.
561
00:40:57,588 --> 00:40:59,556
No, no, no, it's new.
562
00:40:59,723 --> 00:41:02,886
I had this idea to use these
two different types of goat's milk...
563
00:41:03,060 --> 00:41:05,654
...to come up with something
really unique.
564
00:41:05,830 --> 00:41:08,321
It's sweet...
565
00:41:08,499 --> 00:41:11,332
...and sassy and complex.
566
00:41:13,370 --> 00:41:15,201
I was inspired.
567
00:41:15,372 --> 00:41:19,069
So, what are you saying,
I'm your cheese muse?
568
00:41:19,243 --> 00:41:20,710
Yeah.
569
00:41:32,523 --> 00:41:34,286
You're kind of hard
to read right now.
570
00:41:37,695 --> 00:41:40,892
Well, I really want to kiss you...
571
00:41:41,565 --> 00:41:47,299
...but it smells like cheese in here.
572
00:42:01,819 --> 00:42:05,380
We have to take it slow, okay?
573
00:42:05,923 --> 00:42:07,151
We can't have sex.
574
00:42:07,391 --> 00:42:10,952
- Fine.
- Okay. Okay.
575
00:42:12,530 --> 00:42:13,827
Okay.
576
00:42:14,632 --> 00:42:16,099
Okay.
577
00:42:16,267 --> 00:42:17,928
Okay.
578
00:42:37,054 --> 00:42:38,078
Did you just...?
579
00:42:50,935 --> 00:42:53,028
Holy shit!
580
00:42:53,904 --> 00:42:56,896
Is my nose bleeding?
You punched me.
581
00:42:57,074 --> 00:42:59,941
- I'm sorry.
- No. It's okay.
582
00:43:00,110 --> 00:43:01,668
It was amazing.
583
00:43:01,845 --> 00:43:03,472
It was like over-the-top amazing.
584
00:43:03,647 --> 00:43:06,639
What was that,
like three or four for you?
585
00:43:06,984 --> 00:43:09,919
Stan. Stan.
586
00:43:11,689 --> 00:43:14,453
There's something I have to tell you.
587
00:43:14,825 --> 00:43:16,190
Okay.
588
00:43:17,695 --> 00:43:19,185
What is it?
589
00:43:28,472 --> 00:43:30,303
Zoe?
590
00:43:36,180 --> 00:43:37,477
Why are you crying?
591
00:43:39,283 --> 00:43:40,477
I'm pregnant.
592
00:43:41,986 --> 00:43:44,352
I'm pretty sure it doesn't
happen that fast.
593
00:43:44,521 --> 00:43:48,048
No, I know. It's hard to explain.
594
00:43:48,225 --> 00:43:49,886
What are you talking about?
595
00:43:55,899 --> 00:43:57,093
I'm pregnant.
596
00:44:07,011 --> 00:44:08,308
Who's the father?
597
00:44:09,813 --> 00:44:10,973
I don't know.
598
00:44:11,148 --> 00:44:14,140
I mean, I know who it is.
I just don't know his name, exactly.
599
00:44:14,318 --> 00:44:15,808
It's a donor from a sperm bank.
600
00:44:15,986 --> 00:44:18,352
Seriously, what the hell
are you talking about?
601
00:44:19,390 --> 00:44:23,520
- When did all this happen?
- Actually, it was the day we met.
602
00:44:23,694 --> 00:44:26,561
Yeah, I didn't think to tell you...
603
00:44:26,730 --> 00:44:30,427
...because I didn't think there was any
way that I could be pregnant so fast.
604
00:44:30,634 --> 00:44:32,329
But why?
605
00:44:32,503 --> 00:44:34,130
Because I wanted a baby.
606
00:44:34,838 --> 00:44:38,171
I never met the right guy and
I thought that if I waited any longer...
607
00:44:38,342 --> 00:44:40,105
...I might miss my chance.
608
00:44:40,277 --> 00:44:41,767
All right, we just made love.
609
00:44:41,945 --> 00:44:44,607
You tell me you're pregnant
with some stranger's child.
610
00:44:44,782 --> 00:44:47,410
Don't say it like that.
You make it sound dirty.
611
00:44:47,584 --> 00:44:50,576
I wanted a baby and I thought
I had to do it alone.
612
00:44:50,754 --> 00:44:54,053
- It was before I met you.
- I don't know what to say.
613
00:44:54,958 --> 00:44:56,220
What am I supposed to say:
614
00:44:56,393 --> 00:44:58,884
"Congratulations,
this is terrific news"?
615
00:45:00,297 --> 00:45:03,198
I made this big decision
to do this thing.
616
00:45:03,367 --> 00:45:04,732
And then I met you.
617
00:45:07,071 --> 00:45:09,062
- I'm sorry.
- About what?
618
00:45:09,239 --> 00:45:11,366
Getting pregnant
or lying to me about it?
619
00:45:11,542 --> 00:45:14,568
- I didn't lie.
- You didn't tell the truth.
620
00:46:19,143 --> 00:46:21,703
- Where are you going?
- I thought this would be easier.
621
00:46:21,879 --> 00:46:25,815
To just disappear at the crack
of dawn? Don't I get a say?
622
00:46:25,983 --> 00:46:27,848
You said everything last night.
623
00:46:28,018 --> 00:46:29,485
No, I didn't.
624
00:46:29,653 --> 00:46:33,316
You left out the part that you had a
girlfriend. That was pretty convenient.
625
00:46:33,490 --> 00:46:35,321
I don't have a girlfriend.
626
00:46:35,893 --> 00:46:37,793
That girl from the farmers' market.
627
00:46:38,395 --> 00:46:40,454
She's not my girlfriend.
628
00:46:40,631 --> 00:46:43,031
She was,
but that was a few years ago.
629
00:46:48,138 --> 00:46:51,539
Olivia's in my class.
We study together.
630
00:46:52,910 --> 00:46:54,002
Study what?
631
00:46:54,711 --> 00:46:58,169
I'm a student. I'm still in school.
I go at night.
632
00:46:58,382 --> 00:47:02,546
- Why didn't you want to tell me?
- Because it's embarrassing.
633
00:47:02,820 --> 00:47:07,314
You're this incredibly accomplished
person and I didn't even finish college.
634
00:47:07,491 --> 00:47:10,187
I mean, I got this great life...
635
00:47:10,394 --> 00:47:13,727
...but I'm barely passing economics.
You know?
636
00:47:23,874 --> 00:47:26,707
- Where are you going?
- Look, let's not drag this out, okay?
637
00:47:26,877 --> 00:47:29,175
I lied to you, you lied to me.
638
00:47:29,379 --> 00:47:30,937
We both have other plans...
639
00:47:31,114 --> 00:47:33,981
...and being together
is just messing everything up.
640
00:47:34,151 --> 00:47:38,679
We should just go
our separate ways. Goodbye.
641
00:49:32,235 --> 00:49:33,497
So how did you two meet?
642
00:49:34,571 --> 00:49:37,734
We can talk later
in your office or whatever.
643
00:49:38,175 --> 00:49:39,540
Okay.
644
00:49:39,710 --> 00:49:42,873
Well, everything seems
right on track.
645
00:49:43,447 --> 00:49:45,540
A little blood. Quite normal.
646
00:49:45,749 --> 00:49:48,240
You don't have to stay in here
if you don't want.
647
00:49:48,452 --> 00:49:50,079
I'm fine. I'm good.
648
00:49:50,253 --> 00:49:54,519
Now, I'm gonna do an ultrasound.
This is how we view the fetus.
649
00:49:56,560 --> 00:49:58,255
Oh, you rub it on her stomach.
650
00:49:58,462 --> 00:50:00,589
I thought you were gonna put
that huge thing...
651
00:50:00,764 --> 00:50:01,822
In her vagina?
652
00:50:03,367 --> 00:50:06,825
It's too early to go through
the abdomen, you see.
653
00:50:07,004 --> 00:50:09,029
So we have to go through the vagina.
654
00:50:09,206 --> 00:50:11,766
Vagina, vagina, vagina.
655
00:50:12,009 --> 00:50:16,343
Maybe if I say it often enough, you'll
feel a little more comfortable. Vagina.
656
00:50:16,513 --> 00:50:18,174
- It's not working.
- Okay.
657
00:50:19,549 --> 00:50:21,915
Okay, now, Zoe.
658
00:50:22,552 --> 00:50:26,113
With a little bit of luck,
we'll see a heartbeat.
659
00:50:27,991 --> 00:50:29,754
That's it? That little thing?
660
00:50:30,527 --> 00:50:33,894
- Is everything okay?
- Everything is just...
661
00:50:36,400 --> 00:50:37,890
What?
662
00:50:40,003 --> 00:50:41,698
I see another heartbeat.
663
00:50:42,005 --> 00:50:43,131
It has two hearts?
664
00:50:43,306 --> 00:50:45,501
No, but you have two babies.
665
00:51:02,392 --> 00:51:04,326
Are you gonna leave now?
666
00:51:04,528 --> 00:51:06,826
Because this is more
than you bargained for.
667
00:51:07,030 --> 00:51:10,261
You know,
it's more than I bargained for.
668
00:51:10,434 --> 00:51:13,892
But just tell me, okay?
So I can be prepared.
669
00:51:14,071 --> 00:51:18,098
I just need to sit here, you know?
670
00:51:18,809 --> 00:51:20,333
- Okay.
- Okay.
671
00:51:24,581 --> 00:51:27,607
- But then are you gonna leave?
- Okay, one kid is a lot.
672
00:51:28,118 --> 00:51:29,585
Two kids is a posse.
673
00:51:30,287 --> 00:51:32,152
I'm just getting used to us
as a couple.
674
00:51:32,322 --> 00:51:34,483
And now all of a sudden
you're having a posse.
675
00:51:35,292 --> 00:51:36,782
Are you ready for a posse?
676
00:52:02,119 --> 00:52:04,519
I don't even know if I like kids.
677
00:52:05,388 --> 00:52:08,380
Hey, beat it, pal. All right?
678
00:52:08,592 --> 00:52:10,355
Look, I don't want to
cause a scene...
679
00:52:10,527 --> 00:52:12,620
...but get your hands out
of your pockets...
680
00:52:12,796 --> 00:52:14,457
...and get the hell out of here.
681
00:52:14,631 --> 00:52:17,395
No, I'm talking to you,
because you're the only pervert...
682
00:52:17,601 --> 00:52:19,899
...with his hands in his pockets
at a playground.
683
00:52:20,103 --> 00:52:22,901
- I'm not a pervert!
- Lf you don't have kids, get lost.
684
00:52:23,106 --> 00:52:24,368
I have kids, okay?
685
00:52:24,608 --> 00:52:26,872
A week ago, I didn't even know
she was pregnant...
686
00:52:27,043 --> 00:52:28,237
...and now she's having twins.
687
00:52:28,411 --> 00:52:32,814
I just saw the ultrasound.
The one that goes inside.
688
00:52:34,184 --> 00:52:36,015
I know what you need.
689
00:52:37,754 --> 00:52:38,846
How did this happen?
690
00:52:51,001 --> 00:52:52,491
- Just take that off.
- This here?
691
00:52:52,669 --> 00:52:54,432
- Yeah.
- Oh, man, I'm dizzy.
692
00:52:54,638 --> 00:52:56,731
I'm sweaty and dizzy.
693
00:52:58,008 --> 00:53:01,034
- That's normal, bro.
- Is it? Which one's yours?
694
00:53:02,445 --> 00:53:03,571
- I've got three.
- Three?
695
00:53:03,747 --> 00:53:07,740
Yeah, look. That's Charlie right there,
and that's Roxy.
696
00:53:07,918 --> 00:53:09,249
- See that fella?
- Yeah.
697
00:53:09,419 --> 00:53:10,943
That's Mack.
698
00:53:12,355 --> 00:53:14,186
He's eating sand.
699
00:53:14,357 --> 00:53:17,292
Yeah. By the time you get
to the third one...
700
00:53:17,460 --> 00:53:19,553
...you don't worry so much
about that stuff.
701
00:53:20,864 --> 00:53:23,424
What's it like, the whole kid thing?
702
00:53:23,600 --> 00:53:25,397
It's great!
703
00:53:28,471 --> 00:53:32,464
Except for the lack of sleep,
free time...
704
00:53:32,676 --> 00:53:34,735
...sex with my wife...
705
00:53:34,911 --> 00:53:36,879
...buck-naked Fridays
in the family room.
706
00:53:37,047 --> 00:53:39,982
That's not the answer
I was looking for, man. It's fine.
707
00:53:42,419 --> 00:53:44,979
The best way I can describe it is...
708
00:53:45,188 --> 00:53:48,487
...it's awful, awful, awful...
709
00:53:49,559 --> 00:53:53,256
...and then something incredible
happens.
710
00:53:54,598 --> 00:54:00,696
And then awful, awful, awful.
711
00:54:01,238 --> 00:54:03,263
Then something incredible
happens again.
712
00:54:03,473 --> 00:54:08,172
It's like this all day, every day, man.
I feel like I'm drowning...
713
00:54:08,345 --> 00:54:11,746
...like I'm gasping to get
my old life back.
714
00:54:11,915 --> 00:54:14,577
And then a small moment happens...
715
00:54:16,319 --> 00:54:17,513
...that's so magical...
716
00:54:18,255 --> 00:54:22,453
...so life-affirming
that it makes it all worthwhile.
717
00:54:23,660 --> 00:54:25,525
This will be the best thing
you ever do.
718
00:54:25,862 --> 00:54:27,727
Dada!
719
00:54:29,666 --> 00:54:31,258
Hey, son.
720
00:54:32,002 --> 00:54:34,232
I guess this would be that moment,
huh?
721
00:54:34,437 --> 00:54:36,132
Yeah, this would be it.
722
00:54:36,306 --> 00:54:38,297
Hey, what do you have there, son?
723
00:54:38,975 --> 00:54:40,738
Poo-poo.
724
00:54:44,014 --> 00:54:46,039
Well, almost.
725
00:54:47,450 --> 00:54:49,008
Son, is that cat shit?
726
00:54:49,185 --> 00:54:51,016
No.
727
00:54:51,321 --> 00:54:53,186
- That's your shit?
- No.
728
00:54:55,992 --> 00:54:57,755
This ain't even his shit.
729
00:54:59,496 --> 00:55:02,124
Charlie, Roxy,
meet me at the bathroom.
730
00:55:02,299 --> 00:55:05,402
What did I tell you about playing
with other people's shit?
731
00:55:05,802 --> 00:55:07,702
So why are you upset?
732
00:55:08,038 --> 00:55:09,471
It's so lucky.
733
00:55:09,639 --> 00:55:12,665
To get pregnant on the first try
with frozen sperm is rare...
734
00:55:12,842 --> 00:55:16,334
...but to get pregnant with twins?
I mean, come on, that is unheard of.
735
00:55:17,147 --> 00:55:20,048
Okay, okay.
When you want to speak, you can.
736
00:55:20,216 --> 00:55:22,946
Does anyone else have anything
in the meantime...
737
00:55:23,119 --> 00:55:24,586
...that they'd like to share?
738
00:55:24,821 --> 00:55:26,686
- Tabitha.
- Yeah, I'm having a hard time.
739
00:55:26,856 --> 00:55:29,586
Luca keeps asking me
why his friends have two parents...
740
00:55:29,759 --> 00:55:30,885
...and he only has one.
741
00:55:31,061 --> 00:55:33,552
I knew this would happen someday.
I wasn't prepared...
742
00:55:33,730 --> 00:55:34,890
- There's this guy.
- What?
743
00:55:35,065 --> 00:55:37,158
His name is Stan, and he's fantastic.
744
00:55:37,334 --> 00:55:38,426
Wasn't I just speaking?
745
00:55:38,601 --> 00:55:40,535
You know how
you never meet somebody?
746
00:55:40,704 --> 00:55:43,832
The kind of guy
who makes you rethink everything.
747
00:55:44,007 --> 00:55:45,907
Like, maybe I can
be a stay-at-home mom.
748
00:55:46,076 --> 00:55:48,544
Maybe I can.
I'll love being barefoot and pregnant.
749
00:55:48,712 --> 00:55:51,613
He can teach me how to make
cheese. We can live off the land.
750
00:55:51,815 --> 00:55:55,945
Zoe, this group
is called Single Mothers and Proud.
751
00:55:56,519 --> 00:55:57,679
I know.
752
00:55:58,221 --> 00:56:00,951
I know, I know. I'm sorry.
753
00:56:01,391 --> 00:56:03,518
I wasn't planning to meet anybody.
754
00:56:03,693 --> 00:56:05,888
It just happened.
755
00:56:06,062 --> 00:56:08,690
And now that I've thrown all my plans
out the window...
756
00:56:08,865 --> 00:56:12,699
...and really fallen for this guy...
757
00:56:14,371 --> 00:56:17,067
...l'm just afraid
that he might not stay.
758
00:56:19,142 --> 00:56:20,905
What should I do?
759
00:56:25,215 --> 00:56:26,546
I don't know.
760
00:56:27,150 --> 00:56:31,644
This is wildly outside
my field of expertise.
761
00:56:31,855 --> 00:56:35,450
Yeah, because we're
a single-mothers group.
762
00:56:35,925 --> 00:56:39,725
So we don't tend to give advice on
how to get your boyfriend to commit.
763
00:56:39,896 --> 00:56:40,920
Not usually.
764
00:56:41,097 --> 00:56:43,793
Maybe you should join
a different group.
765
00:56:44,401 --> 00:56:45,425
- Ding-dong.
- No.
766
00:56:45,602 --> 00:56:48,901
Okay. We are gonna have to
take a vote on this, Zoe...
767
00:56:49,072 --> 00:56:51,734
...because I think we,
collectively, feel...
768
00:56:51,908 --> 00:56:53,671
...that you are in a very...
769
00:56:54,177 --> 00:56:57,908
...wildly different place
than where we are.
770
00:56:58,081 --> 00:57:00,641
So we are going to take a vote.
771
00:57:01,951 --> 00:57:03,418
Okay.
772
00:57:12,896 --> 00:57:14,295
Taxi!
773
00:57:25,675 --> 00:57:26,937
Hi.
774
00:57:28,411 --> 00:57:29,708
How did you find me?
775
00:57:29,913 --> 00:57:32,074
I called the store.
Said it was an emergency.
776
00:57:32,248 --> 00:57:33,806
What is it?
777
00:57:38,621 --> 00:57:40,145
You're crazy.
778
00:57:41,825 --> 00:57:43,622
I don't expect you to stay.
779
00:57:43,827 --> 00:57:46,489
I don't expect you to expect me
to stay.
780
00:57:47,063 --> 00:57:48,690
What if I want to stay?
781
00:57:49,132 --> 00:57:51,430
Well, then I'd be surprised.
782
00:57:52,936 --> 00:57:54,130
And happy.
783
00:57:55,505 --> 00:57:57,973
- I can't promise anything.
- Neither can I.
784
00:57:58,141 --> 00:57:59,870
Okay.
785
00:58:02,579 --> 00:58:04,672
Okay, fine. Give me the hot dog.
786
00:58:13,490 --> 00:58:14,514
Perry and Hudson.
787
00:58:14,691 --> 00:58:17,023
- Feel free to run every red light.
- You got it.
788
00:58:18,862 --> 00:58:21,456
- Here we go.
- Here we go.
789
00:58:27,470 --> 00:58:29,529
This sucks!
790
00:58:29,706 --> 00:58:32,675
Nothing fits me!
Please, just let me wear sweats.
791
00:58:32,842 --> 00:58:35,504
Honey, you can't wear sweats.
This is important.
792
00:58:35,678 --> 00:58:37,771
- I'll get that.
- Wait, let me suck it in.
793
00:58:41,784 --> 00:58:43,911
Have you got a jacket or something?
794
00:58:52,061 --> 00:58:54,928
- Got you. I got you. Are you all right?
- Yes.
795
00:58:58,701 --> 00:59:00,259
I can't.
796
00:59:05,575 --> 00:59:07,042
Oh, watch it.
797
00:59:14,584 --> 00:59:16,711
- I'm gonna throw up.
- What?
798
00:59:19,255 --> 00:59:20,882
- Good to see you.
- How are you?
799
00:59:21,057 --> 00:59:24,618
Stan. Oh, you are a prince.
Thanks for coming.
800
00:59:25,228 --> 00:59:26,661
Sea urchins?
801
00:59:28,865 --> 00:59:30,264
Excuse me.
802
00:59:40,577 --> 00:59:41,942
- Hi.
- Hi.
803
00:59:48,217 --> 00:59:51,983
I split my dress. And I didn't
want to go. How about that?
804
01:00:15,645 --> 01:00:16,737
What is that thing?
805
01:00:16,913 --> 01:00:19,541
Oh, Mona gave it to me.
It's supposed to help me sleep.
806
01:00:21,484 --> 01:00:22,712
Okay.
807
01:00:27,123 --> 01:00:29,023
- Hold on.
- Okay.
808
01:00:47,744 --> 01:00:49,345
Zoe?
809
01:00:53,516 --> 01:00:54,744
It's been two weeks now...
810
01:00:54,917 --> 01:00:57,715
...and all she ever wants to do
is sleep with that pillow.
811
01:00:57,887 --> 01:01:00,048
The pillow is a bitch.
Totally replacing you?
812
01:01:00,223 --> 01:01:03,556
- Completely. She drags it everywhere.
- My wife, she drew eyes on hers.
813
01:01:03,726 --> 01:01:05,751
I make a move in the middle
of the night...
814
01:01:05,928 --> 01:01:07,759
...the pillow is staring at me.
- Yeah.
815
01:01:07,930 --> 01:01:11,457
- Like, "Bro, I don't think so."
- We used to have sex all the time.
816
01:01:11,668 --> 01:01:14,466
Every day. Now I can't touch her.
I can barely go near her.
817
01:01:14,671 --> 01:01:16,104
She's pregnant. You can't win.
818
01:01:16,272 --> 01:01:18,638
- The only one who wins is the pillow!
- The pillow!
819
01:01:18,808 --> 01:01:22,369
- Screw that pillow, man.
- You might have to. I did once.
820
01:01:24,380 --> 01:01:26,439
We're gonna be fine.
821
01:01:26,616 --> 01:01:29,244
Gonna get through this.
Everything's gonna be fine.
822
01:01:29,419 --> 01:01:32,411
In a year's time, this is just gonna be
a funny memory, right?
823
01:01:32,588 --> 01:01:35,580
That's right. Before you know it,
the kids will be in school...
824
01:01:35,758 --> 01:01:39,717
...and you'll long for the days when
a pillow was your biggest problem.
825
01:01:40,963 --> 01:01:43,124
Must be hard
when they first go off to school.
826
01:01:43,299 --> 01:01:45,096
Little school shoes,
little backpacks.
827
01:01:45,268 --> 01:01:47,463
No, saying goodbye
to the kid is easy.
828
01:01:47,637 --> 01:01:50,435
Saying goodbye to 20 grand,
now, that's hard.
829
01:01:50,606 --> 01:01:53,302
What are you talking about?
What's 20 grand?
830
01:01:53,810 --> 01:01:56,074
And you have twins.
831
01:01:57,013 --> 01:01:58,503
Double-whammy.
832
01:01:59,615 --> 01:02:02,675
That's a whole lot of Parmesan.
833
01:02:02,852 --> 01:02:04,087
Parmesan.
834
01:02:07,523 --> 01:02:09,753
Oh, my God.
835
01:02:09,926 --> 01:02:12,918
All right, this one says,
"most natural nipple."
836
01:02:13,296 --> 01:02:15,764
That looks nothing like my nipples,
Nana.
837
01:02:15,932 --> 01:02:17,923
This one says, "BPA free."
838
01:02:18,101 --> 01:02:20,831
- What's BPA?
- I don't know.
839
01:02:21,003 --> 01:02:22,766
So how do you know
you don't want it?
840
01:02:22,939 --> 01:02:25,635
It's Bisphenol A,
and you do not want it.
841
01:02:25,808 --> 01:02:28,504
If you're gonna use a bottle,
which we do not advocate...
842
01:02:28,678 --> 01:02:30,873
...because breast is best...
- Better.
843
01:02:31,047 --> 01:02:32,241
...use a glass bottle.
844
01:02:32,849 --> 01:02:35,545
- How are you, honey?
- I'm good.
845
01:02:36,486 --> 01:02:38,113
We missed you at the meetings.
846
01:02:38,287 --> 01:02:40,687
Okay, yes.
847
01:02:41,357 --> 01:02:45,953
I never heard back after the vote,
so I just assumed that I was out.
848
01:02:46,162 --> 01:02:51,156
Oh, no, it was unanimous.
Didn't anyone call you?
849
01:02:51,667 --> 01:02:53,032
No?
850
01:02:54,137 --> 01:02:55,604
- Okay.
- Okay.
851
01:02:55,772 --> 01:02:59,037
Well, this is my Nana,
and this is Arthur, her fiancé.
852
01:02:59,242 --> 01:03:00,436
- Hello.
- Nice to meet you.
853
01:03:00,610 --> 01:03:02,703
- How do you do?
- When are you getting married?
854
01:03:02,879 --> 01:03:06,679
She's kept me waiting for 22 years,
so I'm not holding my breath.
855
01:03:06,849 --> 01:03:10,649
Zoe, can I put you on
the phone tree?
856
01:03:10,820 --> 01:03:13,550
I kind of want the whole group there
when it happens.
857
01:03:14,824 --> 01:03:16,815
Thanks. That means a lot.
858
01:03:16,993 --> 01:03:18,722
Okay. Well, happy shopping.
859
01:03:18,895 --> 01:03:22,296
And check out the strollers on
aisle six, because they're awesome.
860
01:03:22,465 --> 01:03:23,796
- Did you not call her?
- Okay.
861
01:03:23,966 --> 01:03:25,501
- I don't know.
- Okay.
862
01:03:41,017 --> 01:03:42,382
Stan!
863
01:03:43,085 --> 01:03:44,382
Stan!
864
01:03:44,554 --> 01:03:46,351
- Lookie!
- Zoe?
865
01:03:47,523 --> 01:03:48,990
- Hey.
- What is that?
866
01:03:49,158 --> 01:03:53,527
It's a Twin X Deluxe, the Rolls-Royce
of strollers. Isn't it awesome?
867
01:03:53,696 --> 01:03:54,924
It's big.
868
01:03:55,097 --> 01:03:56,894
Supposed to fit through
most doorways.
869
01:03:57,066 --> 01:04:00,297
I don't think so.
Just let me get it sideways.
870
01:04:02,071 --> 01:04:04,232
- Keep trying.
- It's gotta have a thing here.
871
01:04:06,309 --> 01:04:07,833
Hang on.
872
01:04:08,678 --> 01:04:09,770
Oh, shit!
873
01:04:09,946 --> 01:04:11,914
- Are you okay?
- It bit me.
874
01:04:15,318 --> 01:04:16,842
What the hell is going on here?
875
01:04:17,053 --> 01:04:19,715
An outfit to bring the babies home in
from the hospital.
876
01:04:19,889 --> 01:04:21,516
How many babies are you having?
877
01:04:21,724 --> 01:04:25,216
I just got two of everything.
Look, baby Village People.
878
01:04:26,062 --> 01:04:29,122
How much money did you spend?
Where are we gonna put all this?
879
01:04:29,332 --> 01:04:32,301
- Don't worry. It'll be okay.
- I don't see how that's possible.
880
01:04:32,468 --> 01:04:34,959
Haven't even had the babies
and everything's changed.
881
01:04:36,339 --> 01:04:39,308
You know what? There's the door.
If you want to go, you can go.
882
01:04:39,475 --> 01:04:41,875
Stop it. I hate it when you do that.
883
01:04:47,116 --> 01:04:49,448
I know. I'm sorry.
884
01:04:54,891 --> 01:04:56,415
Let me see.
885
01:05:00,563 --> 01:05:02,121
Sorry.
886
01:05:10,506 --> 01:05:13,304
Have you gotten to page 279 yet?
887
01:05:13,943 --> 01:05:16,741
No, I stopped reading
when you tore out one of my pages...
888
01:05:16,913 --> 01:05:18,938
...and used it as a napkin.
889
01:05:19,515 --> 01:05:22,416
Well, it says here that women
in their third trimester...
890
01:05:22,585 --> 01:05:24,314
...experience
hormonal mood swings...
891
01:05:24,487 --> 01:05:28,924
...and their partners just have to be
extra understanding about it.
892
01:05:30,993 --> 01:05:33,962
Are you coming on to me right now?
It's kind of hard to tell.
893
01:05:45,841 --> 01:05:48,833
- What?
- You have chicken in your hair.
894
01:05:49,011 --> 01:05:50,842
- I do?
- Right there, yeah.
895
01:05:51,347 --> 01:05:52,974
Did I get it?
896
01:05:58,120 --> 01:06:00,111
You know what, honey?
897
01:06:02,725 --> 01:06:07,128
I'm sorry, but not tonight, okay?
Okay?
898
01:06:10,499 --> 01:06:11,830
Okay.
899
01:06:25,214 --> 01:06:27,580
- Sorry.
- That's okay.
900
01:06:58,414 --> 01:07:00,780
Hey, babe.
Hey. You want some breakfast?
901
01:07:02,418 --> 01:07:04,079
No, thank you.
902
01:07:05,021 --> 01:07:07,489
It's still nighttime. Are you okay?
903
01:07:07,690 --> 01:07:10,625
Yeah, I'm good. I'm good. Do you
know how much preschool is?
904
01:07:10,793 --> 01:07:13,421
Twenty grand. For circle time.
905
01:07:13,596 --> 01:07:16,963
What about college? I think colleges
run about 50 grand right now.
906
01:07:17,133 --> 01:07:20,466
But that's right now, so in 18 years,
it'll be double that, at least.
907
01:07:20,636 --> 01:07:22,536
And we have twins,
so double it again.
908
01:07:23,039 --> 01:07:25,564
So, what's that,
like 200 grand a year?
909
01:07:25,741 --> 01:07:28,369
We haven't even bought books
or clothes or shit.
910
01:07:29,245 --> 01:07:31,611
They're probably gonna need
cars at school.
911
01:07:31,781 --> 01:07:35,217
You know I'm gonna be a pushover
and buy them whatever they want.
912
01:07:35,384 --> 01:07:38,080
So, what's that,
like half a million a year?
913
01:07:38,554 --> 01:07:41,785
I don't have half a million a year.
I'm in night school.
914
01:07:42,024 --> 01:07:44,720
Just something I was thinking about.
It's no big deal.
915
01:07:49,665 --> 01:07:52,031
Why don't you come back
to bed, honey?
916
01:07:52,601 --> 01:07:54,660
- Okay.
- Okay.
917
01:08:08,084 --> 01:08:10,644
- Did I wake you up?
- No.
918
01:08:17,793 --> 01:08:19,988
We're gonna be okay.
919
01:08:20,162 --> 01:08:22,130
I have money saved.
920
01:08:25,067 --> 01:08:27,194
It's not just about the money.
921
01:08:28,637 --> 01:08:31,299
I'll figure out a way
to make enough money.
922
01:08:31,474 --> 01:08:33,101
What is it, then?
923
01:08:35,644 --> 01:08:37,134
It's just...
924
01:08:38,447 --> 01:08:40,347
I need to know.
925
01:08:42,318 --> 01:08:44,513
Are you still in there?
926
01:08:50,326 --> 01:08:52,487
I'm still here.
927
01:10:00,696 --> 01:10:04,188
Excuse me. Can I help you?
928
01:10:04,366 --> 01:10:06,163
What do you think?
929
01:10:11,874 --> 01:10:13,637
It's a bit overwhelming, huh?
930
01:10:13,809 --> 01:10:17,210
There are so many,
and they're so big.
931
01:10:17,379 --> 01:10:19,813
Well, they have to be big.
Two babies, right?
932
01:10:19,982 --> 01:10:23,383
Yeah, but babies are small.
933
01:10:24,920 --> 01:10:27,753
These are for,
like, giant mutant babies.
934
01:10:27,923 --> 01:10:32,724
You should see some of the babies
that come in here. Total fat-asses.
935
01:10:33,762 --> 01:10:38,426
By the way,
my boyfriend and I do custom work.
936
01:10:39,501 --> 01:10:41,731
We can solve this.
937
01:11:23,445 --> 01:11:24,878
Zoe?
938
01:11:27,650 --> 01:11:29,481
What are you doing?
939
01:11:29,652 --> 01:11:32,382
Nothing. How was your exam?
940
01:11:32,554 --> 01:11:34,488
Shitty. Come on,
what were you doing?
941
01:11:35,324 --> 01:11:36,848
Nothing.
942
01:11:39,828 --> 01:11:41,762
I gained three more pounds
this week.
943
01:11:41,930 --> 01:11:43,795
And I think it went all to my ass.
944
01:11:43,999 --> 01:11:48,368
You look great. You always
look great. I missed you today.
945
01:11:48,537 --> 01:11:50,232
I miss my old ass.
946
01:11:50,406 --> 01:11:53,341
You know what's weird?
I never knew your old ass.
947
01:11:53,542 --> 01:11:56,409
It was kind of like this ass,
but way hotter.
948
01:12:07,056 --> 01:12:08,216
- Baby.
- Yeah?
949
01:12:08,390 --> 01:12:09,721
This is my old ass.
950
01:12:13,796 --> 01:12:15,229
What?
951
01:12:19,568 --> 01:12:21,433
Why do you have a picture
of your ass?
952
01:12:21,603 --> 01:12:23,662
My college boyfriend took it.
953
01:12:24,373 --> 01:12:27,308
So in all fairness,
it doesn't look exactly like that...
954
01:12:27,910 --> 01:12:30,378
...but it's pretty close. It's held up.
955
01:12:30,546 --> 01:12:32,810
Yeah, it's a nice ass.
956
01:12:34,216 --> 01:12:36,946
Look, this is me
in the seventh grade.
957
01:12:39,021 --> 01:12:41,717
This is me and Nana
at my confirmation.
958
01:12:47,129 --> 01:12:49,563
This is the last picture
I have of my mom.
959
01:12:50,599 --> 01:12:53,329
She lived for a few more years
after this.
960
01:12:53,535 --> 01:12:55,059
But we didn't take any pictures.
961
01:12:55,237 --> 01:12:57,535
She didn't want us
to remember her that way.
962
01:12:58,407 --> 01:13:00,967
I was 8 years old when she died.
963
01:13:03,345 --> 01:13:05,245
I can't imagine.
964
01:13:08,117 --> 01:13:11,382
She had this great laugh.
And really soft hands.
965
01:13:12,054 --> 01:13:15,217
She used to rub my back
before I went to sleep.
966
01:13:18,260 --> 01:13:21,787
It's such a small thing,
but I think about it all the time.
967
01:13:28,637 --> 01:13:31,470
Why don't you ever talk
about your dad?
968
01:13:33,609 --> 01:13:36,772
She was in a coma
for two years after this.
969
01:13:36,945 --> 01:13:39,470
He didn't stick around.
970
01:13:39,648 --> 01:13:41,946
Oh, God, Zoe.
971
01:13:42,985 --> 01:13:44,543
I'm so sorry.
972
01:13:44,720 --> 01:13:45,846
It's no big deal.
973
01:13:47,156 --> 01:13:49,283
It was an important lesson for me.
974
01:13:49,458 --> 01:13:52,120
That's when I realized
that nothing lasts forever.
975
01:13:55,230 --> 01:13:57,425
So now you know everything.
976
01:14:03,539 --> 01:14:05,632
Some things can last forever.
977
01:14:07,443 --> 01:14:09,172
Maybe.
978
01:14:11,246 --> 01:14:13,544
So about my exam.
979
01:14:14,817 --> 01:14:17,047
I didn't exactly...
980
01:14:18,353 --> 01:14:20,556
That's weird.
981
01:14:26,595 --> 01:14:29,758
I'm confused. Why'd you say
you'd come in the first place?
982
01:14:29,965 --> 01:14:32,399
It seemed like a good idea
at the time.
983
01:14:33,268 --> 01:14:34,496
- Is that Zoe?
- Zoe!
984
01:14:34,903 --> 01:14:37,428
- Hey.
- It is so nice of you to come.
985
01:14:37,606 --> 01:14:38,766
Hi.
986
01:14:38,974 --> 01:14:42,603
Yeah, we just wanted to stop by
and say a quick "hi" and good luck.
987
01:14:42,778 --> 01:14:46,407
No, you're staying. You have to stay.
Lori wants us all here for this.
988
01:14:46,849 --> 01:14:49,579
I really want to stay.
989
01:14:51,520 --> 01:14:53,579
She's having a contraction.
990
01:15:04,266 --> 01:15:06,860
Okay. So, what were you saying?
991
01:15:08,604 --> 01:15:09,628
This is Stan.
992
01:15:09,805 --> 01:15:12,899
- Of course.
- Hi. Hi.
993
01:15:13,075 --> 01:15:15,543
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
994
01:15:15,711 --> 01:15:17,611
Hey, you two should get in here.
995
01:15:17,779 --> 01:15:19,713
No, this is your special moment...
996
01:15:19,882 --> 01:15:22,146
...and we should go.
- No. Oh, God, I'm not shy.
997
01:15:22,317 --> 01:15:24,114
Come on, I've been through it before.
998
01:15:24,286 --> 01:15:27,312
I am not shy.
It is really quite beautiful.
999
01:15:37,232 --> 01:15:39,894
How long do we have to stay here?
1000
01:15:40,068 --> 01:15:43,799
- Just wait till it starts. We'll sneak out.
- Okay.
1001
01:15:47,809 --> 01:15:50,903
Come on, everyone. It's happening.
1002
01:15:51,079 --> 01:15:54,981
Come on.
She's about to get into the water.
1003
01:15:57,286 --> 01:15:58,810
The what?
1004
01:16:03,191 --> 01:16:05,989
I'm gonna be out here, okay?
1005
01:16:09,298 --> 01:16:12,096
Just relax. Breathe.
1006
01:16:16,772 --> 01:16:18,103
I know. Isn't it amazing...
1007
01:16:18,273 --> 01:16:21,106
...how the human body
can just open up like that?
1008
01:16:24,613 --> 01:16:27,309
I'm gonna go get a little air.
I'm feeling a little...
1009
01:16:27,482 --> 01:16:29,950
No, Zoe. Don't you move, Zoe.
1010
01:16:30,118 --> 01:16:31,380
You're my focal point.
1011
01:16:31,587 --> 01:16:34,681
- What?
- Oh, God.
1012
01:16:34,856 --> 01:16:36,517
Push, Lori. Push.
1013
01:16:38,627 --> 01:16:40,390
Holy shit!
1014
01:16:42,364 --> 01:16:44,298
You can't leave.
You're her focal point.
1015
01:16:44,466 --> 01:16:45,797
Can't she use somebody else?
1016
01:16:45,968 --> 01:16:48,402
She's in labor.
You can't argue with her now.
1017
01:16:48,637 --> 01:16:51,003
Someone grab her legs.
Lift them up. Lift them up.
1018
01:16:51,206 --> 01:16:54,539
- Push. That's it, push.
- Breathe.
1019
01:16:57,746 --> 01:16:59,873
Jesus, what is that?
1020
01:17:00,048 --> 01:17:03,540
Perfectly natural.
Sometimes the bowels just release.
1021
01:17:03,719 --> 01:17:07,177
- Ridley, if you could.
- Okay, okay, Lori.
1022
01:17:09,424 --> 01:17:12,860
No, Zoe! Don't you move!
You are my focal point.
1023
01:17:13,028 --> 01:17:14,859
What does that even mean?
1024
01:17:15,030 --> 01:17:17,555
I need to turn over!
I need to turn over, please!
1025
01:17:17,733 --> 01:17:20,725
- We are here for you, sister!
- I need to turn over.
1026
01:17:24,006 --> 01:17:26,668
We are all pushing with you!
1027
01:17:32,147 --> 01:17:33,671
Here comes the head!
1028
01:17:34,216 --> 01:17:37,947
- Get me a mirror! I want to see it!
- No! You don't!
1029
01:17:38,153 --> 01:17:41,213
- Goddamn it, Zoe, don't move!
- I thought you wanted a mirror.
1030
01:17:41,390 --> 01:17:42,789
Stan, the mirror!
1031
01:17:43,525 --> 01:17:44,856
- What?
- The mirror!
1032
01:17:45,260 --> 01:17:46,386
What mirror?
1033
01:17:46,561 --> 01:17:48,654
- Get the mirror! For the love of God!
- Stan!
1034
01:17:48,864 --> 01:17:51,196
- Stan, get the mirror!
- Get the mirror!
1035
01:17:56,938 --> 01:18:00,305
- Hi, I'm Stan. I'm sorry.
- Give me the mirror. Nobody cares.
1036
01:18:00,542 --> 01:18:03,477
- Okay.
- No. No.
1037
01:18:03,679 --> 01:18:07,240
- Look at all that hair.
- That's not the baby's hair.
1038
01:18:07,783 --> 01:18:10,684
One last push!
1039
01:18:34,910 --> 01:18:37,572
Everyone says it's so beautiful.
1040
01:18:38,980 --> 01:18:41,346
I thought it was terrifying.
1041
01:18:42,217 --> 01:18:44,276
I don't ever want to see that again.
1042
01:18:46,521 --> 01:18:48,751
But you want to see ours, right?
1043
01:18:50,325 --> 01:18:52,987
I don't know, baby. It was just...
1044
01:18:53,161 --> 01:18:54,958
I shouldn't have seen that.
1045
01:19:02,671 --> 01:19:05,697
Hey, I was just coming by
to see if you were okay.
1046
01:19:05,874 --> 01:19:08,138
I was worried about you
after the exam.
1047
01:19:08,310 --> 01:19:11,609
- What happened with your exam?
- I was trying to tell you last night.
1048
01:19:16,318 --> 01:19:19,378
- What happened?
- I walked out of the exam.
1049
01:19:19,554 --> 01:19:21,784
- Why?
- I'm quitting school.
1050
01:19:21,957 --> 01:19:24,892
I can't believe you're pregnant.
1051
01:19:25,393 --> 01:19:26,724
Why are you quitting school?
1052
01:19:26,895 --> 01:19:29,523
Because if I stay in school,
I can only work part-time.
1053
01:19:29,698 --> 01:19:32,826
If I work part-time, I can't afford
our expenses. I need to work.
1054
01:19:33,001 --> 01:19:36,232
I had no idea it was this serious.
You're having a baby?
1055
01:19:36,404 --> 01:19:38,497
I didn't know
you'd been together that long.
1056
01:19:38,673 --> 01:19:41,540
Well, yeah, they're not mine,
but yes, we're having a baby.
1057
01:19:41,710 --> 01:19:44,178
We're having twins, actually.
1058
01:19:44,813 --> 01:19:47,509
- What do you mean, "Not mine"?
- Didn't mean it like that.
1059
01:19:48,150 --> 01:19:50,084
- Why would you say that?
- I'm sorry.
1060
01:19:50,285 --> 01:19:51,912
I'm not exactly thinking straight.
1061
01:19:52,087 --> 01:19:54,885
I've been up all night watching Orca
give birth.
1062
01:19:55,924 --> 01:19:57,858
- I am such an idiot.
- No, Zoe.
1063
01:19:58,026 --> 01:20:00,426
Oh, God, I am so stupid.
1064
01:20:00,595 --> 01:20:03,359
This is not about money...
1065
01:20:03,532 --> 01:20:05,432
...or that you can't afford kids.
1066
01:20:05,600 --> 01:20:08,000
You don't want this.
That's the problem.
1067
01:20:08,170 --> 01:20:10,035
He always told me
he didn't want kids.
1068
01:20:10,205 --> 01:20:11,331
Why are you still here?
1069
01:20:12,040 --> 01:20:14,406
- Okay.
- That's it, isn't it?
1070
01:20:14,576 --> 01:20:18,342
Really? After everything we've been
through, you think I don't want kids?
1071
01:20:18,513 --> 01:20:21,073
- That's what you just said.
- It's what you just heard.
1072
01:20:21,249 --> 01:20:22,443
There's a big difference.
1073
01:20:24,319 --> 01:20:26,446
I don't think you're ready for this.
1074
01:20:27,022 --> 01:20:28,455
Now that it's all happening...
1075
01:20:28,623 --> 01:20:30,682
...now you've seen
a woman push a baby out...
1076
01:20:30,859 --> 01:20:33,589
...now it's all too real for you.
And you're scared.
1077
01:20:33,762 --> 01:20:37,095
Damn right, I'm scared. Yeah.
1078
01:20:37,265 --> 01:20:39,426
- Aren't you scared?
- Know what I'm scared of?
1079
01:20:39,601 --> 01:20:41,535
I'm scared
I'm gonna have these babies...
1080
01:20:41,703 --> 01:20:43,364
...and then
you're gonna walk away.
1081
01:20:43,538 --> 01:20:46,234
You're gonna say, "They're
not mine," and just walk away.
1082
01:20:46,408 --> 01:20:48,399
You look for some hint
that I'm leaving...
1083
01:20:48,577 --> 01:20:50,807
...no matter how many times
I tell you I'm not.
1084
01:20:50,979 --> 01:20:53,971
I don't know what else to do.
What else am I supposed to do?
1085
01:20:58,887 --> 01:20:59,911
Nothing.
1086
01:21:03,291 --> 01:21:05,088
So, what are you saying?
1087
01:21:06,761 --> 01:21:08,661
- Just go now.
- I don't want to go.
1088
01:21:08,864 --> 01:21:11,890
- Go.
- This is crazy, Zoe. It's crazy.
1089
01:21:13,468 --> 01:21:15,766
If you don't go, I'll go.
1090
01:21:29,184 --> 01:21:32,779
You know what? Just so you know
when you do the autopsy here...
1091
01:21:32,954 --> 01:21:36,515
...you better realize you have no one
to blame but yourself.
1092
01:21:47,168 --> 01:21:48,829
You had to come along, didn't you?
1093
01:21:49,971 --> 01:21:51,939
I was fine with my plan.
1094
01:21:52,140 --> 01:21:54,267
Totally fine with it.
1095
01:22:52,233 --> 01:22:53,530
You've lost your mind.
1096
01:22:53,702 --> 01:22:54,862
Just give me a boost.
1097
01:22:55,036 --> 01:22:57,436
If you think you are getting
into this Dumpster...
1098
01:22:57,605 --> 01:23:00,870
I need that pillow, okay?
I can't sleep.
1099
01:23:01,042 --> 01:23:03,203
I will never sleep again
without that pillow.
1100
01:23:03,378 --> 01:23:05,573
Well, go to his house.
1101
01:23:05,747 --> 01:23:08,238
Tell him you're sorry.
Then you'll be able to sleep.
1102
01:23:08,416 --> 01:23:10,941
This has nothing to do with
that stupid pillow.
1103
01:23:11,119 --> 01:23:14,714
I'm not going to his house, okay?
He walked away from me.
1104
01:23:14,889 --> 01:23:16,049
You made him walk away.
1105
01:23:16,224 --> 01:23:17,885
What do you know?
You weren't there.
1106
01:23:18,059 --> 01:23:19,924
I've known you for 30 years.
1107
01:23:20,095 --> 01:23:22,563
I know that you would never
see this through.
1108
01:23:22,731 --> 01:23:24,926
I know that you don't trust people.
1109
01:23:25,100 --> 01:23:27,227
You and your grandmother,
crazy-pants.
1110
01:23:27,402 --> 01:23:29,563
She's been engaged to Arthur
for how long now?
1111
01:23:29,738 --> 01:23:31,137
She's never gonna marry him.
1112
01:23:31,306 --> 01:23:33,740
Just like you were never gonna
stay with Stan.
1113
01:23:33,908 --> 01:23:35,068
Okay, Mona.
1114
01:23:35,243 --> 01:23:37,575
I mean,
no wonder you got a sperm donor.
1115
01:23:37,746 --> 01:23:41,307
He's the perfect boyfriend.
He'll never let you down.
1116
01:23:47,922 --> 01:23:51,790
You know, I used a sperm donor
because I wanted a baby.
1117
01:23:53,395 --> 01:23:55,920
Because I wanted a family.
1118
01:23:58,066 --> 01:24:01,126
Because Nana's not gonna
live forever...
1119
01:24:01,836 --> 01:24:04,066
...and then it'll just be me.
1120
01:24:05,473 --> 01:24:10,433
Look, just go home. Okay?
I don't need you here.
1121
01:24:10,612 --> 01:24:12,170
I need my pillow.
1122
01:24:23,591 --> 01:24:25,616
I'm sorry.
1123
01:24:25,794 --> 01:24:27,921
That was too far.
1124
01:24:29,164 --> 01:24:32,133
Yeah. That was too far.
1125
01:24:34,069 --> 01:24:36,128
But you know I'm right.
1126
01:24:38,773 --> 01:24:40,798
Stop talking.
1127
01:24:40,975 --> 01:24:44,968
My pillow doesn't talk.
It just lies there and shuts up.
1128
01:24:57,125 --> 01:24:58,786
Don't beg, Nuts.
1129
01:25:00,261 --> 01:25:02,695
My God, you are stubborn.
1130
01:25:02,931 --> 01:25:04,990
Knock, knock.
1131
01:25:05,166 --> 01:25:06,793
Who's ready to celebrate?
1132
01:25:06,968 --> 01:25:08,697
Oh, Mona, I'm so glad you're here...
1133
01:25:08,870 --> 01:25:11,805
...because now
I can tell both of you together.
1134
01:25:12,674 --> 01:25:13,868
I'm getting married.
1135
01:25:14,275 --> 01:25:15,299
- What?
- What?
1136
01:25:15,477 --> 01:25:18,935
Next weekend.
We finally decided to do it.
1137
01:25:20,715 --> 01:25:22,615
Oh, my God.
1138
01:25:24,319 --> 01:25:28,449
It finally hit me.
This man loves me, and I love him.
1139
01:25:30,091 --> 01:25:31,786
What the hell am I waiting for?
1140
01:25:33,228 --> 01:25:35,526
Oh, I have you to thank for it, Zoe.
1141
01:25:35,697 --> 01:25:39,895
Just seeing you and Stan together,
how happy you are.
1142
01:25:40,101 --> 01:25:42,899
You know, the way you've just thrown
caution to the wind...
1143
01:25:43,104 --> 01:25:45,072
...and decided to go for it.
1144
01:25:45,240 --> 01:25:47,231
I want some of that too.
1145
01:25:50,245 --> 01:25:51,712
What?
1146
01:25:53,181 --> 01:25:54,671
Stan and I broke up.
1147
01:25:57,385 --> 01:26:00,752
- He said the babies weren't his.
- He didn't mean to say it.
1148
01:26:00,922 --> 01:26:03,652
- Tell her the whole story.
- He said it.
1149
01:26:03,825 --> 01:26:06,817
If he said it, he thinks it.
If he thinks it, then he feels it.
1150
01:26:06,995 --> 01:26:09,225
And if he feels it,
what choice do I have?
1151
01:26:09,397 --> 01:26:11,991
Zoe, you know that's not true.
1152
01:26:12,167 --> 01:26:15,261
You're just looking for another way
to back out.
1153
01:26:15,436 --> 01:26:17,370
- Thank you.
- I'm not gonna do this.
1154
01:26:17,572 --> 01:26:21,565
This man has chosen to be with you
and raise your kids as his own.
1155
01:26:21,776 --> 01:26:27,146
You're just gonna throw that all away
for some stupid word choice?
1156
01:27:08,456 --> 01:27:12,187
- Look at you.
- Oh, look at you.
1157
01:27:20,902 --> 01:27:22,426
I'm worried about you.
1158
01:27:22,637 --> 01:27:24,969
No, don't worry.
1159
01:27:25,940 --> 01:27:29,671
I'm great. I'm great.
1160
01:27:29,844 --> 01:27:31,277
I'm just emotional.
1161
01:27:31,746 --> 01:27:33,646
Come on,
let me just finish your makeup.
1162
01:27:33,815 --> 01:27:36,511
Honey, you don't always have
to be so strong.
1163
01:27:36,718 --> 01:27:40,279
I know you learned it from me, but it's
no good. What does it get you?
1164
01:27:40,488 --> 01:27:44,288
It means that I take care of myself,
just like you always did.
1165
01:27:44,459 --> 01:27:46,586
No, Arthur takes care of me.
1166
01:27:46,761 --> 01:27:50,595
He's been taking care of me for
22 years. I just didn't want to admit it.
1167
01:27:50,765 --> 01:27:54,861
Zoe, stop pushing people away.
1168
01:27:55,837 --> 01:27:58,863
- I don't want to talk about this, okay?
- Listen to me.
1169
01:27:59,107 --> 01:28:01,837
Zoe, you will never have
a healthy relationship...
1170
01:28:02,010 --> 01:28:04,501
...with Stan or any man if you don't.
1171
01:28:05,179 --> 01:28:08,671
You have to learn to trust people.
1172
01:28:20,561 --> 01:28:22,188
Okay?
1173
01:28:30,705 --> 01:28:31,729
What is that?
1174
01:28:31,906 --> 01:28:36,138
It's your custom stroller,
the Twin X Torpedo.
1175
01:28:38,179 --> 01:28:39,373
I didn't order this.
1176
01:28:39,547 --> 01:28:41,310
Your husband did.
Or your boyfriend.
1177
01:28:41,516 --> 01:28:44,417
I don't know exactly
what your relationship is.
1178
01:28:44,585 --> 01:28:47,554
Stan? When did he do that?
1179
01:28:47,722 --> 01:28:49,656
About a month ago.
1180
01:28:51,526 --> 01:28:54,791
You don't like it. Shit.
We worked really hard on this one.
1181
01:28:58,533 --> 01:29:00,057
He wasn't gonna leave, was he?
1182
01:29:08,309 --> 01:29:10,834
I'm not really sure
what's happening here.
1183
01:29:11,012 --> 01:29:13,242
Oh, God. We gotta go get him.
1184
01:29:13,414 --> 01:29:15,609
What? I'm getting married in
20 minutes.
1185
01:29:15,817 --> 01:29:21,619
- Weddings never start on time.
- We can't be late. He's 93 years old.
1186
01:29:28,596 --> 01:29:30,063
Stop it.
1187
01:29:30,231 --> 01:29:31,789
Pick up.
1188
01:29:31,966 --> 01:29:33,957
He has to pick up.
1189
01:29:35,570 --> 01:29:38,937
I'm gonna hurl that thing
into the fucking holy water.
1190
01:30:16,277 --> 01:30:18,802
Is this new? "The Zoe?"
1191
01:30:19,414 --> 01:30:21,348
Yeah, it's the first week
it's been out.
1192
01:30:21,516 --> 01:30:23,381
Can I have a sample? What's it like?
1193
01:30:23,584 --> 01:30:28,180
It's stubborn, overly suspicious
and distrustful of men.
1194
01:30:33,594 --> 01:30:36,825
- This song is taking forever.
- This song's never gonna be over.
1195
01:30:49,310 --> 01:30:54,213
What time is it, Shadybrook?
That's right. It's conga time.
1196
01:30:55,716 --> 01:30:58,844
Everybody, get out there
and shake those titanium hips.
1197
01:31:00,354 --> 01:31:02,686
- Conga.
- Conga time.
1198
01:31:02,857 --> 01:31:04,654
I need to talk to you
for two seconds.
1199
01:31:04,826 --> 01:31:07,124
- We really gotta go. Come on.
- We have to go.
1200
01:31:19,540 --> 01:31:20,871
Please, get me out of here.
1201
01:31:21,042 --> 01:31:23,636
I can't find any exit signs
behind the purple flowers.
1202
01:31:23,811 --> 01:31:26,006
Who knew the conga was
this much fun?
1203
01:31:31,352 --> 01:31:33,047
I have rhythm all of a sudden.
1204
01:31:36,858 --> 01:31:38,382
Oh, shit.
1205
01:31:39,660 --> 01:31:40,752
Why is the floor wet?
1206
01:31:40,962 --> 01:31:45,194
- Damn it, not again. No, not me.
- It wasn't me.
1207
01:31:45,366 --> 01:31:46,697
- Not me.
- Nope.
1208
01:31:46,868 --> 01:31:49,268
I think my water just broke.
1209
01:31:51,072 --> 01:31:52,773
Baby time!
1210
01:32:02,116 --> 01:32:03,378
Stop it!
1211
01:32:03,551 --> 01:32:06,281
What can we do for you, darling?
1212
01:32:06,487 --> 01:32:08,352
This dress is tight.
1213
01:32:08,523 --> 01:32:10,991
I can do it. If you want to let me.
Grab the strap.
1214
01:32:12,126 --> 01:32:14,526
- Fingernail.
- Can we make a pit stop?
1215
01:32:29,143 --> 01:32:30,371
You can't drive in here!
1216
01:32:30,545 --> 01:32:32,945
Okay. Move it. Out of the way.
Lady with a baby.
1217
01:32:34,382 --> 01:32:36,282
Are you just gonna leave it there?
1218
01:32:36,450 --> 01:32:38,213
- What's going on?
- Your muffins suck!
1219
01:32:38,386 --> 01:32:40,377
- I'm going out of my mind.
- What are you doing?
1220
01:32:40,555 --> 01:32:43,615
I'm trying to call you and
doing the conga. My dress is falling.
1221
01:32:43,791 --> 01:32:46,954
When they say labor's painful,
they're not kidding. Really hurts.
1222
01:32:47,128 --> 01:32:50,757
- You're in labor?
- But the stroller came. It's so beautiful.
1223
01:32:50,932 --> 01:32:54,095
Oh, God! That hurts.
1224
01:32:54,268 --> 01:32:56,259
- Why didn't you pick up your phone?
- When?
1225
01:32:56,437 --> 01:32:59,235
I called you a hundred times.
I wanted you at the wedding.
1226
01:32:59,407 --> 01:33:01,238
- What wedding?
- It was so beautiful.
1227
01:33:01,409 --> 01:33:02,603
And then it wasn't.
1228
01:33:02,777 --> 01:33:06,110
People slipping everywhere.
Oh, God, I hope nobody got hurt.
1229
01:33:06,280 --> 01:33:08,748
- You're not making any sense.
- No, that's just it.
1230
01:33:08,950 --> 01:33:11,441
Everything makes sense.
1231
01:33:12,286 --> 01:33:17,087
All of a sudden,
everything is just so crystal clear.
1232
01:33:17,258 --> 01:33:18,987
And the thing that's the clearest...
1233
01:33:19,160 --> 01:33:24,097
...is that I am so madly, deeply,
and completely in love with you.
1234
01:33:24,966 --> 01:33:28,299
I can't imagine spending
another minute apart.
1235
01:33:36,978 --> 01:33:38,172
Stan.
1236
01:33:39,480 --> 01:33:41,072
Stan?
1237
01:33:42,316 --> 01:33:45,217
Zoe, after all this time,
you come in here and you expect...
1238
01:33:48,756 --> 01:33:50,917
I gotta go to the hospital. I gotta go.
1239
01:33:51,125 --> 01:33:54,492
- Zoe.
- Let's go. Move it! Get the lead out.
1240
01:33:54,662 --> 01:33:58,359
- Zoe, wait up! Zoe, wait.
- Let's go, let's go, let's go.
1241
01:33:58,899 --> 01:34:02,733
Listen. How do I know when things get
tough, you won't just run away again?
1242
01:34:02,903 --> 01:34:07,499
I can't handle it. You broke my heart.
You completely destroyed me.
1243
01:34:07,675 --> 01:34:11,372
You destroyed me too! It's not like
this has been easy for me!
1244
01:34:11,545 --> 01:34:13,342
Son of a bitch!
1245
01:34:13,514 --> 01:34:15,573
Just breathe through it.
It's gonna be okay.
1246
01:34:15,750 --> 01:34:17,741
Don't you tell me it's gonna be okay!
1247
01:34:17,918 --> 01:34:20,785
You don't know it's gonna be okay.
It hurts. I'm scared.
1248
01:34:20,955 --> 01:34:22,183
It is gonna be okay!
1249
01:34:22,356 --> 01:34:24,950
- Refrain from yelling at the patient.
- I'm not yelling!
1250
01:34:25,159 --> 01:34:27,753
- I'm getting her to see my point!
- Sounds like yelling.
1251
01:34:27,928 --> 01:34:30,522
What will it take for you to believe
I'm here forever?
1252
01:34:30,698 --> 01:34:32,290
You had to see a stupid stroller?
1253
01:34:32,466 --> 01:34:35,367
I've been to every doctor's
appointment with you.
1254
01:34:35,536 --> 01:34:37,163
I picked out names with you.
1255
01:34:39,674 --> 01:34:43,610
I saved this
from the very first day we met.
1256
01:34:43,811 --> 01:34:46,541
It's the one that was tails-up.
You flipped it to heads.
1257
01:34:46,714 --> 01:34:48,443
I've kept it this whole time.
1258
01:34:51,619 --> 01:34:54,247
And it's brought me
the most incredible luck.
1259
01:34:56,724 --> 01:34:58,282
I can't believe you kept that.
1260
01:34:59,293 --> 01:35:01,420
What about the fact that,
like it or not...
1261
01:35:01,595 --> 01:35:03,961
...I will be here holding your hand
through this?
1262
01:35:05,266 --> 01:35:08,929
What about the fact that I'm gonna be
here when these babies are born?
1263
01:35:09,470 --> 01:35:11,995
Because I love their mommy.
1264
01:35:12,206 --> 01:35:15,437
And what I want more
than anything else in the world...
1265
01:35:17,344 --> 01:35:19,278
...is to be their daddy.
1266
01:35:24,652 --> 01:35:28,418
But you have to promise me
that from now on...
1267
01:35:28,589 --> 01:35:31,456
...you'll believe me when I say I'm in.
1268
01:35:31,625 --> 01:35:34,219
And I'm not going anywhere.
1269
01:35:37,531 --> 01:35:39,658
Can you do that?
1270
01:35:45,840 --> 01:35:47,603
Can you?
1271
01:35:54,482 --> 01:35:55,506
Yes.
1272
01:36:09,563 --> 01:36:10,621
Okay.
1273
01:36:10,798 --> 01:36:14,029
- All right, now push. Time to push. Go.
- Okay.
1274
01:36:14,668 --> 01:36:16,533
Breathe, breathe.
1275
01:36:17,538 --> 01:36:19,165
Breathe.
1276
01:36:25,012 --> 01:36:26,809
"Remember my three rules.
1277
01:36:26,981 --> 01:36:29,472
No touch, no talk
and no eye contact...
1278
01:36:29,650 --> 01:36:32,517
...while the dog's nose is busy
analyzing our energy...
1279
01:36:32,686 --> 01:36:35,314
...and all the different scents
in our body.
1280
01:36:35,489 --> 01:36:38,515
This sniffing can last
from three seconds to a minute.
1281
01:36:38,692 --> 01:36:40,683
It's important not to interrupt
the dog...
1282
01:36:40,861 --> 01:36:43,523
...while she's intent
on accomplishing this ritual."
1283
01:36:44,799 --> 01:36:46,426
You know, one day...
1284
01:36:46,600 --> 01:36:50,036
...l'm gonna tell you girls the story
of your mommy and me.
1285
01:36:50,204 --> 01:36:52,536
Cesar should write a book
about that one.
1286
01:36:53,174 --> 01:36:55,734
Talk about a bestseller.
1287
01:36:55,943 --> 01:36:57,535
Come here.
1288
01:37:01,315 --> 01:37:03,510
That's nice.
1289
01:37:11,725 --> 01:37:12,749
Come here.
1290
01:37:14,929 --> 01:37:18,456
It was a battle,
but they finally fell asleep.
1291
01:37:20,401 --> 01:37:21,732
Penny had to poop and then...
1292
01:37:21,902 --> 01:37:25,633
Don't talk about Penny's poop
when I'm about to kiss you.
1293
01:37:25,840 --> 01:37:27,239
Okay.
1294
01:37:48,495 --> 01:37:49,928
It's perfect.
1295
01:37:50,130 --> 01:37:51,620
You know what the best part is?
1296
01:37:53,000 --> 01:37:55,161
You can stop in for lunch
every single day.
1297
01:37:57,104 --> 01:38:00,733
- All right. You're here.
- Speech. Speech.
1298
01:38:01,442 --> 01:38:03,410
Okay, thank you.
1299
01:38:05,746 --> 01:38:06,974
Thank you all for coming.
1300
01:38:07,181 --> 01:38:10,480
This has been a dream for me
for a long time.
1301
01:38:13,287 --> 01:38:16,984
And I need to thank one person
for giving me the courage to do it.
1302
01:38:18,292 --> 01:38:20,954
- To Zoe.
- Zoe!
1303
01:38:21,128 --> 01:38:24,291
From the moment you stole my cab...
1304
01:38:24,632 --> 01:38:27,328
...from the day you dissed me
at the farmers' market...
1305
01:38:27,501 --> 01:38:32,200
...I have been totally
and completely under your spell.
1306
01:38:33,307 --> 01:38:34,672
I love you.
1307
01:38:35,175 --> 01:38:37,769
And you've made me
the happiest man alive.
1308
01:38:37,945 --> 01:38:39,173
It was my cab.
1309
01:38:41,615 --> 01:38:43,105
Come over here for a minute.
1310
01:38:43,284 --> 01:38:46,447
- Give me that.
- What?
1311
01:38:47,855 --> 01:38:51,382
Since we do everything backwards
and in hyperspeed...
1312
01:38:51,558 --> 01:38:53,253
...I was wondering if we could do...
1313
01:38:53,427 --> 01:38:55,861
...what naturally follows
having twins together.
1314
01:38:57,798 --> 01:38:58,924
Oh, my...
1315
01:38:59,133 --> 01:39:01,158
Holy shit!
1316
01:39:02,503 --> 01:39:03,868
Will you marry me?
1317
01:39:07,007 --> 01:39:08,565
Say yes.
1318
01:39:13,247 --> 01:39:14,578
Yes.
1319
01:39:31,098 --> 01:39:34,329
- I can't believe it.
- I know.
1320
01:39:35,469 --> 01:39:38,836
- Did we really just get engaged?
- Yes, we did.
1321
01:39:40,174 --> 01:39:42,540
Soon you will be my wife.
1322
01:39:49,850 --> 01:39:51,613
Stan.
1323
01:39:59,493 --> 01:40:00,892
Stan.
1324
01:40:16,877 --> 01:40:19,710
- Action.
- What?
1325
01:40:37,431 --> 01:40:40,958
Dakota was born right here.
Right where you're sitting, actually.
1326
01:40:41,168 --> 01:40:42,999
How did you do that here
in this chair?
1327
01:40:43,170 --> 01:40:45,297
The seat comes up.
1328
01:40:48,442 --> 01:40:51,934
- What do you have in your hand?
- Daddy, poo-poo.
1329
01:40:55,849 --> 01:40:58,977
What a good girl. You're okay.
Tuck, get up there. Go on.
1330
01:40:59,153 --> 01:41:02,589
Go on. Go on. Go on.
1331
01:41:05,793 --> 01:41:08,557
Now, wait a minute!
Just one second!
1332
01:41:08,762 --> 01:41:11,287
When did you eat corn?
Is this cat shit?
1333
01:41:11,465 --> 01:41:12,955
No.
1334
01:41:13,867 --> 01:41:16,665
We don't even know
what kind of shit it is.
1335
01:41:21,375 --> 01:41:24,105
Go on, go on. Good, good, good.
Go on, go on, go on.
1336
01:41:25,579 --> 01:41:29,140
Take one. Take five. Take 10.
Fifteen. Twenty-four.
1337
01:41:29,349 --> 01:41:32,079
- There. Happy now?
- You know what goes in those things?
1338
01:41:32,586 --> 01:41:34,611
- Oh, my God.
- Awesome.
1339
01:41:35,122 --> 01:41:38,387
Yeah, do that. That would be nice.
Oh, God.
1340
01:41:38,625 --> 01:41:43,062
Breast to face. There is
no better bond that could be made.
1341
01:41:43,230 --> 01:41:45,164
Breast to face.
1342
01:41:45,365 --> 01:41:48,630
Buck-naked Fridays in the family
room. Buck-naked Wednesdays.
1343
01:41:48,802 --> 01:41:51,566
Buck-naked Friday while the maid
cleans your living room.
1344
01:41:51,738 --> 01:41:54,070
Buck-naked. Buck-naked. Naked.
1345
01:41:54,241 --> 01:41:55,868
Oh, God. Oh, God.
1346
01:42:01,448 --> 01:42:04,281
Perfectly natural.
Sometimes the bowels just release.
1347
01:42:04,451 --> 01:42:05,475
My mother is dead.
1348
01:42:05,652 --> 01:42:09,816
If she was here, she would probably
let me feed from her teat.
1349
01:42:15,529 --> 01:42:19,590
Get the mirror, Stan!
I will rip your throat out!
1350
01:42:25,339 --> 01:42:27,807
Oh, no. Oh, no.
1351
01:42:33,714 --> 01:42:35,682
Not tonight, okay?
1352
01:42:37,718 --> 01:42:39,049
Okay.
1353
01:42:44,625 --> 01:42:46,855
- And cut.
- Food in my hair.
1354
01:42:47,305 --> 01:42:53,740
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