1 00:00:06,715 --> 00:00:08,633 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 2 00:01:20,372 --> 00:01:22,123 (RAP MUSIC THUMPING) 3 00:01:23,041 --> 00:01:24,083 TURTLE: I can't believe this. 4 00:01:24,168 --> 00:01:27,044 The guy finally hooks up with Justine Chapin and he won't tell us nothing. 5 00:01:27,129 --> 00:01:29,046 VINCE: I told you, Turtle, we had a good time. 6 00:01:29,131 --> 00:01:31,382 TURTLE: Come on, Vin. Need little more info than that. 7 00:01:31,467 --> 00:01:33,968 Besides, since when don't we share the details of our love life? 8 00:01:34,052 --> 00:01:36,596 Since you shared the details of the girl with the anal warts. 9 00:01:36,847 --> 00:01:38,806 That was therapy, not entertainment. 10 00:01:38,891 --> 00:01:40,975 Just give the little perv something, bro. 11 00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:43,102 He won't stop nagging till he gets what he wants. 12 00:01:43,187 --> 00:01:46,355 - Like you don't want to know? - I have my own sex life to jerk off to. 13 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:48,816 TURTLE: Uh, correction, you had your own sex life. 14 00:01:48,901 --> 00:01:50,401 I mean, it was virtual, but now it's over. 15 00:01:50,486 --> 00:01:51,486 - Turtle! - What? 16 00:01:51,570 --> 00:01:54,238 No, it's okay, bro. He's right. It's over. 17 00:01:54,698 --> 00:01:56,574 Jacqueline was just another hozy 18 00:01:56,658 --> 00:01:59,410 who tore my heart out of my chest and handed it to me. 19 00:01:59,495 --> 00:02:00,953 So laugh at me. Whatever. 20 00:02:01,038 --> 00:02:03,623 I'm not laughing, Drama. I'm just curious what a "hozy" is. 21 00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:07,960 It's a ho and a floozy, E. And as it turns out, Jacqueline was both. 22 00:02:08,045 --> 00:02:09,837 VINCE: We'll get you through it, Johnny. 23 00:02:09,922 --> 00:02:11,672 Let's cross here. 24 00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:16,886 - (HONKING) - TURTLE: We got it, come on. 25 00:02:17,262 --> 00:02:19,639 Keep your eyes closed, Daddy! 26 00:02:19,723 --> 00:02:21,474 They're closed, buddy. They're closed. 27 00:02:21,558 --> 00:02:22,975 - He's peeking. - I'm not peeking. 28 00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:25,311 Why do women never trust me, honey? Come on. 29 00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:27,230 Okay, we're almost there. Just a couple more steps. 30 00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:28,314 All right. 31 00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:29,440 - A couple more. - Okay. 32 00:02:29,525 --> 00:02:30,525 - Okay. - All right. 33 00:02:30,609 --> 00:02:32,610 All right, stop now. Open your eyes. 34 00:02:34,238 --> 00:02:35,488 Fuck me! 35 00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:37,365 - Daddy! - I'm sorry, buddy, I'm sorry. 36 00:02:37,449 --> 00:02:38,866 - But holy sh... - Ari! 37 00:02:39,201 --> 00:02:40,827 Baby, what is this? 38 00:02:40,911 --> 00:02:43,329 Happy anniversary. 39 00:02:43,747 --> 00:02:46,332 I don't... Baby, my gift does not compare to that. 40 00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:48,334 Oh, don't worry. I got myself something to make up for it. 41 00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:51,796 Oh, my God, remember how much I wanted this when I was 25? 42 00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:54,173 - Now you have it. - But I'm not 25. 43 00:02:54,258 --> 00:02:57,260 Well, maybe it'll make you feel like you are. 44 00:02:58,345 --> 00:03:00,638 - Can I drive? - Never. 45 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,350 - Oh, man! - (ARI LAUGHS) 46 00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:06,519 I know things are bad, Marvin. 47 00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:10,189 Bad was last year. Things are fucking disastrous now. 48 00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:12,191 You're like Katrina with a black card. 49 00:03:12,276 --> 00:03:15,403 - I've been broke before. - You're not broke, you're bankrupt. 50 00:03:15,487 --> 00:03:17,113 You've got to file Chapter 11. 51 00:03:17,239 --> 00:03:18,656 I'm not filing Chapter 11. 52 00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:21,909 You've got to wipe the slate clean and start all over again. 53 00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:24,954 And this time on a budget and without dependents. 54 00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,497 Should I just get an appetizer? 55 00:03:26,582 --> 00:03:27,999 You should go on a hunger strike. 56 00:03:28,333 --> 00:03:30,918 Vince, this is no time to be proud. 57 00:03:31,003 --> 00:03:33,337 Marvin, my father filed bankruptcy, 58 00:03:33,422 --> 00:03:35,798 left my mother with nothing, not even child support. 59 00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:37,717 So call it pride, whatever you want, I'm not going to do it. 60 00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:41,387 You're a better man than me, bro. I filed three times. 61 00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:42,930 Maybe that's why I'm alone. 62 00:03:43,015 --> 00:03:44,640 Maybe it's because you're fucking ugly. 63 00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:47,393 All right, Vince, don't file. 64 00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:49,312 But get a job, and fast. 65 00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:50,855 There's nothing out there to grab that quick. 66 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:56,277 Oh, no? Call Shauna. She's just got a client we share an appearance deal in Dubai. 67 00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:58,070 They pay big money for girls over there. 68 00:03:58,155 --> 00:04:00,239 It was Michael Bublé, moron. 69 00:04:00,324 --> 00:04:04,035 And all he had to do was show up at a camel race. 70 00:04:04,119 --> 00:04:05,745 A camel race? Doesn't sound too bad, huh? 71 00:04:07,164 --> 00:04:08,873 (POP SONG BLARING) 72 00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:13,210 (ENGINE REWING) 73 00:04:20,510 --> 00:04:23,054 Wow, nice car, Ari. 74 00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:26,057 Anniversary gift from the wife. Thanks, Davies. 75 00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:28,434 Oh, that's right, I forgot, you married into money. 76 00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:29,852 Good for you, Ari. Good for you. 77 00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:32,229 We only use her money for the small stuff. 78 00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:34,857 Someday when you're done sucking on Terrance's tit, 79 00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:37,401 you might want to get yourself into a man's car like this. 80 00:04:38,153 --> 00:04:40,154 (SNIFFS) Breathe deep, Ari, 81 00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:43,115 here comes the dust. 82 00:04:46,244 --> 00:04:47,828 - Fuck it. - (TIRES SQUEAL) 83 00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:07,390 Easy, Ari. 84 00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:10,226 What do you say we race for pink slips? 85 00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:14,063 I was thinking about getting that car for my daughter for her Sweet 16. 86 00:05:14,564 --> 00:05:16,482 Your daughter's almost 16, huh, Ari? 87 00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:17,775 Two more years and she's legal. 88 00:05:17,985 --> 00:05:19,986 - Watch it, Davies. - Or what? 89 00:05:20,070 --> 00:05:22,238 You couldn't catch me if you wanted to. 90 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,657 100 bucks says I pass Bijan before you. 91 00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:26,575 Bijan? You really are a bitch. 92 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,285 But you're on! 93 00:05:50,308 --> 00:05:51,684 (HONKING) 94 00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,783 - (BRAKES SQUEAL) - (THUDS) 95 00:06:12,122 --> 00:06:14,123 Christy, where the fuck are you? 96 00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:17,043 I thought you said you were going to speak nicer to me in front of the clients. 97 00:06:17,127 --> 00:06:19,211 File a labor grievance. In the meantime, 98 00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:21,589 do we have any appearances that Vincent can do? 99 00:06:21,673 --> 00:06:25,009 Actually, I just got a call from some guy in Bel Air about his daughter's Sweet 16. 100 00:06:25,343 --> 00:06:28,012 Zac Efron was supposed to do it, but his appendix exploded. 101 00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:29,972 Great. Call him back and tell him we have an actor 102 00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:31,265 whose testicles have actually dropped. 103 00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:35,394 But tell him that Vince won't do it for a dime less than Zachary was getting. 104 00:06:35,479 --> 00:06:37,438 VINCE: Wow, maybe we should have Shauna call the studios. 105 00:06:37,522 --> 00:06:38,564 Yeah, if she can close. 106 00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:41,817 Oh, I'll close, Eric. These people would be lucky to have you, Vincent. 107 00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:43,360 Let's make it a two-fer, Shauna. 108 00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:46,030 This way the Chase brothers can wipe them out clean. 109 00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:47,573 Stick to chili festivals, Drama. 110 00:06:48,617 --> 00:06:49,909 What the fuck does that mean? 111 00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:52,369 It means that you're far from a Sweet Sixteener's wet dream. 112 00:06:58,043 --> 00:07:00,086 I'll be outside, fellas. 113 00:07:00,170 --> 00:07:01,670 What's he so sensitive about? 114 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,339 He's going through a rough breakup. 115 00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:05,841 - Someone went out with him? - (CELL PHONE RINGS) 116 00:07:06,635 --> 00:07:08,094 - Hello? - It's Amanda. 117 00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:09,929 - Oh, hey. - This a good time? 118 00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:12,598 - Yeah, what's up? - I am impressed with your taste, Eric. 119 00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:13,682 Oh, yeah? 120 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,392 That's a very good script you gave me, very good. 121 00:07:15,477 --> 00:07:17,603 - Yeah, I thought so. - I sent it to Edward Norton, 122 00:07:17,687 --> 00:07:20,022 'cause I have a feeling he may just respond to it. 123 00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:22,525 - Ed Norton? - Yes, I hope that was okay. 124 00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:23,776 - Yeah, of course. - Great. 125 00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:25,194 I'll let you know when I hear something. 126 00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:27,530 - Say hi to Vince. - All right, thanks, Amanda. 127 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:30,282 Amanda says hi. 128 00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:31,408 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 129 00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:33,160 - She liked Nine Brave Souls. - Really? 130 00:07:33,245 --> 00:07:35,287 She wants to give it to Ed Norton. 131 00:07:35,831 --> 00:07:37,456 Oh. 132 00:07:37,541 --> 00:07:39,208 They're excited about Vince, 133 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:40,751 but they'd like to meet him before they commit. 134 00:07:40,836 --> 00:07:44,338 - I can't even book a Sweet 16? - Oh, it's just a formality. 135 00:07:44,422 --> 00:07:47,800 Go there, be your charming self, but leave Turtle and Drama in the car, okay? 136 00:07:49,261 --> 00:07:51,137 I was worried about you, Ari. 137 00:07:51,221 --> 00:07:53,472 You're never late and you always answer your cell. 138 00:07:53,557 --> 00:07:56,308 Yeah, well, I had a little problem with the Ferrari. 139 00:07:56,393 --> 00:07:57,643 - Already? - Yep. 140 00:07:57,727 --> 00:08:00,729 I was involved in some illegal street-racing. 141 00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:02,898 - Ooh, sexy. - With Adam Davies. 142 00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:06,986 - Ew, gross. - Yep, and I lost so I owe him 100 bucks. 143 00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:09,071 Oh, fuck Adam Davies. 144 00:08:09,156 --> 00:08:11,031 I'd like to see him come here and try and collect. 145 00:08:11,116 --> 00:08:14,577 Well, my confidence grows tenfold knowing that you have my back, Lloyd. 146 00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:17,496 But I don't welch. So here is $100. 147 00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:21,083 Please put it in a brown paper bag along with a nice big pile of shit 148 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,960 and send it over there. 149 00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:25,171 - Excuse me... - Human shit, Lloyd. 150 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:27,464 - Right now. - That is really disgusting, Ari. 151 00:08:27,549 --> 00:08:30,676 No, really disgusting is going to be the American Psycho style dismemberment 152 00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:34,597 I am going to perform on you, if you don't do that right fucking now. 153 00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:39,560 - What about doggy poo? - Human shit, Lloyd! 154 00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:43,189 Yours, if it's easier. Otherwise, go camp out in the men's bathroom 155 00:08:43,273 --> 00:08:46,609 or the women's bathroom, whichever will have you, but I need a specimen. 156 00:08:46,902 --> 00:08:48,527 (PHONE RINGING) 157 00:08:50,614 --> 00:08:52,364 - What? - ERIC: That's a nice greeting 158 00:08:52,449 --> 00:08:54,366 the Miller Gold Agency's got going on there, Ari. 159 00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:56,911 Listen, if I knew it was you, it would have been a lot worse. 160 00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:59,038 - What? - I want you to know that we're on our way 161 00:08:59,122 --> 00:09:01,457 to try to land Vince a Sweet 16 appearance gig. 162 00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:03,792 (SIGHS) Jesus! 163 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:07,296 Yeah, meanwhile the script I sent you last week is on its way to Ed Norton. 164 00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:09,006 - Really? - Yeah, Nine Brave Souls. 165 00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:10,132 Amanda liked it. 166 00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:12,051 Yeah, we all know what great taste she has. 167 00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:16,055 - Vince needs a job, Ari. - I understand that, Eric. 168 00:09:16,139 --> 00:09:20,309 But you need to understand that you are the reason he doesn't have one. 169 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:23,520 Vince needs a studio movie. Not an indie. 170 00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:26,523 So don't waste my fucking time with the possibility 171 00:09:26,608 --> 00:09:29,401 that maybe Ed Norton might read or may not read some fucking script 172 00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:32,196 that may or may not be good because some half-ass agent 173 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:35,824 who couldn't carry my sperm sample likes it. 174 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:38,702 - Okay? - Yeah, okay. 175 00:09:38,787 --> 00:09:40,955 - Does he have anything? - Yeah, he's got a few leads. 176 00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:42,164 What was he yelling about? 177 00:09:42,958 --> 00:09:45,084 Ah, you know Ari. He's just stressed. 178 00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:48,587 - Everybody seems to be today. - The moon must be in retrograde. 179 00:09:48,964 --> 00:09:50,631 (RAP MUSIC PLAYING) 180 00:10:00,642 --> 00:10:01,892 - MAN: Yes? - How are you doing? 181 00:10:01,977 --> 00:10:04,228 I have Vincent Chase for the Sweet 16 meet. 182 00:10:04,312 --> 00:10:07,523 Come through. And please take your shoes off at the front door. 183 00:10:15,699 --> 00:10:17,366 I'm not taking off my fucking shoes. 184 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,868 What's the problem, Drama? You make people do it at your place. 185 00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:22,121 I just broke up with someone, Turtle. I'm exhausted. 186 00:10:22,205 --> 00:10:24,540 MAN: Mr. Levine is waiting for you. This way, please. 187 00:10:24,874 --> 00:10:27,001 (OVER VIDEOGAME) You're about to die with blood on. 188 00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:28,919 Let's get him! 189 00:10:29,004 --> 00:10:31,630 Mr. Bob, your 2:00 is here. 190 00:10:31,715 --> 00:10:33,882 BOB: Oh, welcome. Please come in. 191 00:10:34,509 --> 00:10:36,176 Oh, guys, I'm so happy you're here. 192 00:10:36,261 --> 00:10:37,511 - Bob Levine. How are you? - Eric Murphy. 193 00:10:37,595 --> 00:10:38,721 - Nice to meet you. - Vince. 194 00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:40,139 - Please, of course. - How are you, Bob? 195 00:10:40,223 --> 00:10:42,224 - How are you? Nice to see you. - Hey. 196 00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:44,435 Hey, Mitchell, say hello to Mr. Chase and his friends. 197 00:10:44,728 --> 00:10:47,187 - Hey. - I'm so happy you're here in my home. 198 00:10:47,272 --> 00:10:48,897 I'm such a fan. 199 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:50,941 Now who wants some Johnny Blue? 200 00:10:51,026 --> 00:10:52,401 - Johnny does. - I'm driving. 201 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:53,944 - Why not? - I'm working. 202 00:10:54,029 --> 00:10:55,446 - All right. - In fact, make mine a double. 203 00:10:55,530 --> 00:10:58,907 - Coming up. - Hello, everybody, hello. 204 00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:01,744 - I thought we said 2:00? - We came right from Shauna's office. 205 00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:04,830 All right, it's 2:30 and I am extremely pressed for time. 206 00:11:04,914 --> 00:11:07,291 That Zac Efron really fucked me over. 207 00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:11,003 But my son tells me my daughter's going to be absolutely thrilled with you. 208 00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:12,796 - Right, Mitchy? - Uh-huh. 209 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,549 Oh, what are you doing with your shoes on? 210 00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:17,593 Please take your shoes off. 211 00:11:19,596 --> 00:11:21,722 Take your shoes off, Drama. 212 00:11:24,768 --> 00:11:27,353 Now I don't know what my husband told you, 213 00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:30,397 but tonight is extremely important to both of us. 214 00:11:30,482 --> 00:11:34,651 Ah, yes, we're spending just over a million on our sweet baby girl. 215 00:11:34,736 --> 00:11:36,362 That's some Sweet 16. 216 00:11:36,488 --> 00:11:38,113 You don't know the half of it. 217 00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:41,158 We're gonna be swimming in an ocean of Cristal. 218 00:11:41,242 --> 00:11:43,160 I've got enough Almas Russian-gold caviar 219 00:11:43,244 --> 00:11:46,705 for 300 guests, so, please, don't come on an empty stomach! 220 00:11:46,790 --> 00:11:49,041 Okay, so Efron was supposed to do a performance. 221 00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:50,334 Now what can you do? 222 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:52,836 Uh, I act. 223 00:11:52,921 --> 00:11:53,962 What else can you do? 224 00:11:55,131 --> 00:11:58,175 Vince would love to make an appearance, greet guests, 225 00:11:58,259 --> 00:12:00,302 have a dance with your daughter. How does that sound? 226 00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:01,512 - Nice. - Boring. 227 00:12:01,596 --> 00:12:04,932 - She doesn't do boring. - No, I need flashy. 228 00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:06,892 (SOFTLY) She needs someone to take that stick out of her ass. 229 00:12:06,976 --> 00:12:09,728 - Excuse me? - Vince was Aquaman, 230 00:12:09,813 --> 00:12:12,314 ma'am, star of the highest grossing film of all time. 231 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:15,651 Aquaman, Aquaman, yes. 232 00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,694 Yes, okay... 233 00:12:17,779 --> 00:12:20,364 And what is Aquaman known for again, Mitchell? 234 00:12:20,824 --> 00:12:23,992 He's king of the ocean. He can dehydrate his opponent with a single touch. 235 00:12:24,411 --> 00:12:26,245 MRS. LEVINE: Right. BOB: Sweetheart, what if... 236 00:12:26,329 --> 00:12:30,999 Okay, here's what I'm thinking. We will have Vince dressed as Aquaman, 237 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:34,545 unveil him at the party sitting in an ice throne 238 00:12:34,629 --> 00:12:36,296 - in the middle of the pool. - Are you serious? 239 00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:41,635 All of the tables surround the hotel pool and you will be like a living centerpiece 240 00:12:41,719 --> 00:12:43,762 for everyone to see. I love this. 241 00:12:43,847 --> 00:12:46,014 Five hours on an iceberg could get a bit chilly, huh? 242 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:49,017 - Sweetie? - 200 Gs warm you up, Vince? 243 00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:51,145 Fuck that. I'd rather be bankrupt. 244 00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:53,105 Turtle, you know how you drive in Grand Theft Auto? 245 00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:54,481 Way ahead of you, Vin. 246 00:12:54,566 --> 00:12:56,859 - What a waste of time. - Not a total waste. 247 00:12:58,361 --> 00:13:00,279 - Oh, you boosted their Scotch, Johnny? - Fuck 'em. 248 00:13:00,363 --> 00:13:02,990 The way they insulted you, bro, they had it coming. 249 00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:04,908 Let's get hammered like it's St. Paddy's day. 250 00:13:04,993 --> 00:13:06,118 I know a place. 251 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:15,794 Look at this shit, man, gangster, drug dealer, rapper. Pfft! 252 00:13:15,879 --> 00:13:17,546 I may as well be playing my fucking self. 253 00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:19,131 Listen, what, do you want to play Othello? 254 00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:21,508 No, I want to do Black Sabbath. 255 00:13:22,177 --> 00:13:24,094 - The Ozzy Osbourne story? - It's actually a story 256 00:13:24,179 --> 00:13:28,098 about a young black supermarket checker who falls in love with an older Jewish woman. 257 00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,767 - And I'm thinking Meryl Streep. - We love Meryl Streep, Ari. 258 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:33,145 Meryl Streep is good. 259 00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:35,105 It's set against the Crown Heights riots. 260 00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:37,274 - Any love scenes? - Three. 261 00:13:37,358 --> 00:13:39,359 - I mean, I could pull it off. - MAN: Mr. Gold? 262 00:13:39,444 --> 00:13:40,486 Yes. 263 00:13:40,570 --> 00:13:42,571 I'm Officer Nickerson. This is Officer Morgan. 264 00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,907 - Officer? - Is this about the car accident? 265 00:13:44,991 --> 00:13:48,619 No, sir, this is about that bag of feces you sent one Adam Davies today. 266 00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:50,579 What about it? 267 00:13:50,788 --> 00:13:52,498 That sounds like an admission of guilt to me. 268 00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,458 - Cuff him, Bill. - No, no, hold on a second. 269 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:55,918 Wait a minute! Hold on a second. 270 00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:57,961 Since when is sending someone a present a crime? 271 00:13:58,046 --> 00:13:59,379 Since we say it is, Mr. Gold. 272 00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:01,548 You are literally on some sick shit, Ari. 273 00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:03,550 NICKERSON: Mr. Gold, if you cooperate, 274 00:14:03,718 --> 00:14:06,011 we'll make this as pleasant an experience as we can for you. 275 00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:08,180 (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) 276 00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:09,932 ARl: Wait a minute, wait! What is this? 277 00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:13,936 - Who are you guys? - BHPD... Boner Patrol. 278 00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:15,729 Oh, please... Oh, come on! 279 00:14:15,813 --> 00:14:18,440 You're about to get your stiffy inspected. 280 00:14:18,650 --> 00:14:20,859 - Oh, my God! - Lloyd! 281 00:14:20,944 --> 00:14:22,986 - (LAUGHING) - Lloyd! 282 00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:25,239 - I'm outta here, Ari. - Hold on, TI. 283 00:14:25,323 --> 00:14:27,324 Call me when you're done with your entertainment. 284 00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:29,826 Lloyd, you speak their language. Make it stop! 285 00:14:29,911 --> 00:14:33,956 It'll be over soon, Ari. Just close your eyes and think of pussy. 286 00:14:37,961 --> 00:14:39,253 (RINGS) 287 00:14:40,088 --> 00:14:42,381 I hope you're not calling me for a release on your hard on, Ari. 288 00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:44,508 I'd call your mother for that, Davies. 289 00:14:44,592 --> 00:14:47,761 I actually want to talk to you about a little misunderstanding. 290 00:14:47,845 --> 00:14:50,138 See, practical jokes are for friends. 291 00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:51,682 And we ain't friends. 292 00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:53,767 It wasn't a joke, Ari, it was torture. 293 00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:56,436 Get used to it, pal, 'cause it's gonna keep coming. 294 00:14:56,521 --> 00:14:58,480 Like the Terminator, I cannot be stopped. 295 00:14:58,773 --> 00:15:01,650 This is a very dangerous game you're playing, Davies. 296 00:15:01,776 --> 00:15:04,945 Ari, I am going to fuck with you day and night. 297 00:15:05,029 --> 00:15:07,281 You know why? Because I'm younger, 298 00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:09,491 cooler and better looking than you. 299 00:15:10,285 --> 00:15:11,785 And because I can. 300 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:14,705 This means war, Lloyd. 301 00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:17,624 I thought it was war when I sent him shit this morning. 302 00:15:17,709 --> 00:15:20,919 Look, I'm about to tell you something that stays with us, all right? 303 00:15:21,004 --> 00:15:23,755 And is not to be shared with Mrs. Ari. 304 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:26,300 Now I know you don't know the man code, so I want you to swear 305 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:29,803 on Tom getting gangrene on his cock that you will say nothing. 306 00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:32,180 - I won't utter a word. - All right. 307 00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:35,434 Davies' girlfriend back in the day made a play for me 308 00:15:35,518 --> 00:15:37,769 when she was humping a pushcart in the mailroom. 309 00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:40,188 I didn't do anything, but I saved the evidence. 310 00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:42,441 - Slut! - (ARI LAUGHS) 311 00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:43,734 What are you going to do with these, Ari? 312 00:15:43,818 --> 00:15:47,154 I am going to send these to Davies and I'm going to shatter his world, 313 00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:50,824 because a shattered world is what you get when you mess with Ari Gold. 314 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:54,953 Well, if you ask me, Ari Gold should rise up and be the bigger man. 315 00:15:55,038 --> 00:15:59,291 Well, unlike your world, where the bigger man pounds the smaller man from behind, 316 00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:02,294 the bigger man in my world is the last man standing. 317 00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:04,463 And that man will be me, all right? 318 00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:08,592 So I want you to send those pictures and let's watch the atom bomb explode. 319 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:09,760 (LAUGHS) 320 00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:11,803 (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) 321 00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:15,390 Hos, hos and more hos. I can't believe you guys dragged me here. 322 00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:18,894 - You used to love Crazy Girls. - I used to love a lot of things, bro. 323 00:16:19,020 --> 00:16:20,771 But a lot of things just didn't love me back. 324 00:16:20,855 --> 00:16:21,897 Hey, guys. 325 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,066 Save it, honey. We're anti-women here. 326 00:16:24,150 --> 00:16:26,568 - Real smooth, Drama, nice. - (PHONE RINGS) 327 00:16:28,905 --> 00:16:31,531 - Marvin. - BOTH: Voicemail. 328 00:16:31,616 --> 00:16:33,909 Maybe we should just eBay-off everything we own. 329 00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,535 We don't own that much. Most of it's leased. 330 00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:38,372 Auction that shit off anyway. It'll be somebody else's problem. 331 00:16:38,456 --> 00:16:40,332 - Great idea, Turtle. - We're not gonna panic. 332 00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:43,502 It's gonna work out someway somehow. What is it you always say, Vince? 333 00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:45,545 It'll work out. It always does, right? 334 00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:46,922 - I used to say that? - Yeah. 335 00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:48,965 Hear, hear! Life sucks. 336 00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:52,094 - (PHONE RINGS) - Hey, Shauna. 337 00:16:52,178 --> 00:16:55,514 It ain't Shauna, Eric. It's Marvin. Stop ducking my fucking phone calls. 338 00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:57,349 It's Shauna, too, Eric. You're on conference. 339 00:16:57,433 --> 00:17:00,227 - What's going on? - What's going on is your client ducked out 340 00:17:00,311 --> 00:17:02,938 - on a $200,000 appearance fee. - Yeah, I know. I was there. 341 00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,190 Didn't I stress the importance of income this morning? 342 00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:07,025 Yeah, you did, but it wasn't the right offer. 343 00:17:07,110 --> 00:17:10,028 SHAUNA: We know all about it, Eric. I spoke to Bob Levine personally. 344 00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:12,531 He'll pay Vincent 200 grand just to serenade 345 00:17:12,615 --> 00:17:14,616 the birthday girl with that bullshit I Love You, Baby song 346 00:17:14,701 --> 00:17:17,285 from Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons. Can Vincent handle that? 347 00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:18,745 That's why I'm on the phone, Eric, 348 00:17:18,830 --> 00:17:20,706 - to say he fucking better. - You got 200 grand. 349 00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:23,500 All you gotta do is sing I Can't Take My Eyes Off You to the kid. 350 00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:25,127 No iceberg? 351 00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:27,003 - He's in. - Great, I'll notify the Levines. 352 00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:29,631 I'll see you here tomorrow morning with the check, Eric. 353 00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:31,007 I'll talk to you guys later. 354 00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:34,386 - We're back in business. - It's about time! 355 00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:37,013 What do you say we spend some of that cash on some dances? 356 00:17:37,098 --> 00:17:38,765 I thought you'd never ask. 357 00:17:38,850 --> 00:17:40,726 Traitorous scum. 358 00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:44,980 It's coming, Lloyd. It's coming. 359 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:47,315 - When, Ari, when? - (PHONE RINGS) 360 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,860 - Now, Lloyd. - Ari Gold's office. 361 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:52,654 Just one moment, Mr. Davies. 362 00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:55,407 Can you smell it, Lloyd? You know what that smells like? 363 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,576 Defeat. Surrender is imminent. 364 00:17:57,952 --> 00:18:00,078 - I feel bad for him now. - Fuck him! 365 00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:02,038 Like the great philosopher Sun Tzu said, 366 00:18:02,123 --> 00:18:05,333 "When you're done fucking your enemies, fuck them some more." 367 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,836 I took philosophy and Sun Tzu did not say that, Ari. 368 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,297 I'm paraphrasing, whatever. Put him through. 369 00:18:10,381 --> 00:18:11,757 Davies! 370 00:18:11,841 --> 00:18:13,258 (APPLAUDS) 371 00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:15,469 Bravo, Ari, bravo. 372 00:18:15,553 --> 00:18:18,138 Only I broke up with that whore six months ago. 373 00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:22,142 - Bullshit you did. - True shit, Ari. 374 00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:24,019 I'm fucking a Miami Heat cheerleader now. 375 00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:26,730 If you don't believe me, watch the game tomorrow night. 376 00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:28,899 I'll have her blow me courtside for the cameras. 377 00:18:28,983 --> 00:18:31,610 Yeah, but it's still gotta sting knowing the entire time 378 00:18:31,694 --> 00:18:35,489 you were fucking your ex, she was dreaming of getting stuffed by me. 379 00:18:35,573 --> 00:18:39,201 Please, Ari, you were hardly the only guy around here she offered to fuck. 380 00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:42,454 Word is she took on the whole new-media division at the La Quinta retreat. 381 00:18:42,538 --> 00:18:45,040 Whatever, Davies. Either way, we're done! 382 00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:47,167 Done? 383 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:48,668 (CHUCKLES) 384 00:18:49,086 --> 00:18:51,213 Not quite, pal. 385 00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:52,881 Check your email. 386 00:18:53,049 --> 00:18:55,717 I, uh, think you're gonna like it. 387 00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:58,887 I found it on the World Wide Web. 388 00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:01,807 (GASPS) The missus! 389 00:19:01,891 --> 00:19:05,602 It's from a little-known piece of cinema called Hardbodies 3. 390 00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:07,896 Did you book that job for her? 391 00:19:09,023 --> 00:19:10,857 Breathe, Ari, breathe. 392 00:19:13,820 --> 00:19:16,613 Ari Gold! Wait for backup! 393 00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:25,163 Please, Ari, let me at least call your therapist. 394 00:19:25,248 --> 00:19:27,374 Adam Davies, I'm looking for you! 395 00:19:27,458 --> 00:19:29,334 Mr. Gold, Mr. Gold! 396 00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:31,169 I'm back! 397 00:19:32,296 --> 00:19:35,131 Davies, where are you? 398 00:19:36,092 --> 00:19:39,845 Adam Davies, this is your unlucky day. 399 00:19:40,972 --> 00:19:42,222 Davies. 400 00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:45,517 Adam Davies. 401 00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:48,103 Bring your bitch-ass out here. 402 00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:50,313 Davies! 403 00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:54,234 DAVIES: Are you serious coming here like this, Ari? 404 00:19:57,780 --> 00:20:01,157 Games are games, Davies, but that is the mother of my children. 405 00:20:01,242 --> 00:20:06,746 So apologize or I will kick your ass in front of your entire deadbeat agency. 406 00:20:10,293 --> 00:20:13,545 That is what we call a bitch slap. A bitch slap for a bitch. 407 00:20:13,629 --> 00:20:16,506 What do you say we go outside and finish it off, huh? 408 00:20:16,591 --> 00:20:19,676 - You are going down for this, Ari. - I don't really care. 409 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,220 Now you apologize for what you did 410 00:20:22,305 --> 00:20:27,142 or I'm going to knock you the fuck out right here and right now. 411 00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:32,647 I'm gonna count to three. 412 00:20:33,316 --> 00:20:34,649 One... 413 00:20:35,943 --> 00:20:37,360 - I apologize. - I can't hear you. 414 00:20:37,445 --> 00:20:39,195 I said... 415 00:20:40,615 --> 00:20:42,157 I'm sorry. 416 00:20:47,038 --> 00:20:49,414 Nice seeing everybody again. 417 00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:50,457 Whew. 418 00:20:50,541 --> 00:20:52,000 Come on, Lloyd. 419 00:20:52,710 --> 00:20:54,878 Ari Gold, you have fists of fury! 420 00:20:54,962 --> 00:20:56,880 (PARTY MUSIC PLAYING) 421 00:21:15,066 --> 00:21:16,775 Bartender, another. 422 00:21:16,859 --> 00:21:19,653 Jesus, Drama, don't you think you've had enough for one day? 423 00:21:19,737 --> 00:21:21,029 What, are you my sponsor? 424 00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:23,949 He's right, Drama. You're like Nick Cage in Leaving Las Vegas, 425 00:21:24,033 --> 00:21:26,034 except you don't have Elisabeth Shue to fuck. 426 00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:28,745 Elisabeth Shue played a whore, Turtle. 427 00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:32,540 Need I say more? Hurry up, bartender. I've got pain to numb. 428 00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:35,919 Mmm, you know what, Johnny? I'll do another one with you. 429 00:21:36,045 --> 00:21:38,129 - Make it two. - There you go again, bro. 430 00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:41,466 Proving my theory that the only men in this gang 431 00:21:41,550 --> 00:21:44,094 with hair on their balls are the Chase men. 432 00:21:44,553 --> 00:21:45,887 You all right? 433 00:21:46,222 --> 00:21:49,808 Yeah, you know, it's not exactly how I imagined my life to go. 434 00:21:49,892 --> 00:21:51,559 But things could be worse. 435 00:21:51,644 --> 00:21:53,228 Things are going up from here, I know it. 436 00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:55,146 How about my singing voice, how's that gonna go? 437 00:21:55,231 --> 00:21:56,398 You're gonna be great. 438 00:21:56,482 --> 00:21:58,358 I've heard you sing it before at J.P.'s bar back home. 439 00:21:58,442 --> 00:22:01,569 - Yeah, I was drunk, E. - Here come the Levines. 440 00:22:01,654 --> 00:22:03,154 You're gonna be great. Don't worry about it. 441 00:22:03,239 --> 00:22:04,239 Thanks. 442 00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:05,949 Good evening, gentlemen. 443 00:22:06,033 --> 00:22:08,994 Please say hello to our Sweet Sixteener Candace. 444 00:22:09,078 --> 00:22:12,288 - Hello, Candace, nice to meet you. - You, too, Vincent. 445 00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:14,499 - DRAMA: Future hozy. - Uh-huh. 446 00:22:14,583 --> 00:22:16,418 Please excuse the bandage. 447 00:22:16,502 --> 00:22:19,337 She hurt her nose doing God-knows-what. 448 00:22:19,422 --> 00:22:21,631 Right after I just paid 20K for a nose job. 449 00:22:21,716 --> 00:22:22,716 - Bob! - Dad! 450 00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,467 What, sweet plum? It happened. 451 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:26,553 Maybe I injured it sucking my boyfriend's dick. 452 00:22:26,637 --> 00:22:28,138 Did you ever think about that? 453 00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:29,723 Forget I said "future". 454 00:22:29,807 --> 00:22:32,350 - Don't talk to your father that way. - Fuck you, Mom. 455 00:22:32,435 --> 00:22:35,854 I will go fuck this whole fucking party right now if I fucking want to. 456 00:22:35,938 --> 00:22:38,940 Stop being such a drama queen! 457 00:22:40,401 --> 00:22:42,110 - She's a sweet kid. - Yeah! 458 00:22:42,194 --> 00:22:44,904 (LAUGHS) Teenager going through a phase. 459 00:22:45,072 --> 00:22:47,407 That phase will last a lifetime, Bob. 460 00:22:47,783 --> 00:22:49,117 He's kidding. 461 00:22:51,078 --> 00:22:52,996 Everybody, I'm home! 462 00:22:53,914 --> 00:22:55,540 Thank you, sweetie. 463 00:22:55,624 --> 00:22:58,293 - Why did Lloyd drop you off? - I had a little mishap with the Ferrari. 464 00:22:58,377 --> 00:22:59,627 What? 465 00:23:00,004 --> 00:23:01,880 - Daddy! - There's my man. 466 00:23:01,964 --> 00:23:03,965 Oh, ho, ho! Guess what? 467 00:23:04,050 --> 00:23:06,551 - Your daddy got you a gift. - Whoa, cool. 468 00:23:06,635 --> 00:23:08,178 Cool is right. And you know what? 469 00:23:08,262 --> 00:23:10,430 I'm gonna show you how to use them. You want to know why? 470 00:23:10,514 --> 00:23:12,140 Because you're the strongest guy in Hollywood? 471 00:23:12,224 --> 00:23:13,808 - I told you that already? - Mmm-hmm. 472 00:23:13,893 --> 00:23:16,019 Now it's official. Boom, boom-boom. 473 00:23:16,103 --> 00:23:17,103 - Honey? - Yeah, baby? 474 00:23:17,188 --> 00:23:19,230 What kind of mishap did you get in with the Ferrari? 475 00:23:19,315 --> 00:23:22,400 Remember how you said the car would make me feel 25 again? 476 00:23:22,485 --> 00:23:24,736 - Yes. - It made me feel 18 again... 477 00:23:24,820 --> 00:23:26,362 - Whoo! ...and I'm going to prove it to you. 478 00:23:26,447 --> 00:23:29,240 - What about the kids? - Sarah, take care of your brother. 479 00:23:29,325 --> 00:23:31,076 Mommy and Daddy have a little conference. 480 00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:32,702 Are you still taking me to dinner? 481 00:23:32,787 --> 00:23:34,287 - That's doubtful. - Okay. 482 00:23:34,663 --> 00:23:36,664 (SINGING BIRTHDAY SONG) 483 00:23:40,836 --> 00:23:43,088 That's not the only thing she's going to be blowing tonight. 484 00:23:43,172 --> 00:23:46,800 - Will you shut up, Drama? - Why don't you make me, E? 485 00:23:46,884 --> 00:23:48,927 MRS. LEVINE: Okay, everybody, 486 00:23:49,303 --> 00:23:52,639 we have a very special surprise for you. 487 00:23:52,723 --> 00:23:55,558 Please give a warm, warm welcome 488 00:23:55,643 --> 00:24:00,438 to Mr. Vincent Chase ofAquaman fame! 489 00:24:00,523 --> 00:24:01,773 - (SQUEALING) - DRAMA: Break a leg, bro. 490 00:24:01,857 --> 00:24:04,776 ERIC: Knock 'em dead. MRS. LEVINE: He's coming. 491 00:24:11,033 --> 00:24:13,368 Won't you please say a few words? 492 00:24:15,204 --> 00:24:19,707 Well, I'm very happy to be here with Candace on this very special occasion. 493 00:24:20,543 --> 00:24:23,294 I know a way you could make it more special, Vincent. 494 00:24:23,379 --> 00:24:25,547 Candace, don't be a whore. 495 00:24:25,631 --> 00:24:27,757 Everybody, Mr. Vincent Chase. 496 00:24:28,551 --> 00:24:31,136 - (CHEERING) - (ORCHESTRA PLAYING) 497 00:24:35,266 --> 00:24:37,809 (SINGING CAN'T TAKE MY EYES OFF YOU) 498 00:24:46,277 --> 00:24:48,403 I'm not letting him go out like this. 499 00:24:48,863 --> 00:24:51,322 Not my bro. Not tonight. 500 00:24:51,407 --> 00:24:53,241 What are you talking about? He sounds great. 501 00:24:53,325 --> 00:24:55,535 - Stop it, Drama. - Not to my ears he don't. 502 00:24:55,619 --> 00:24:57,579 Put your jacket on! 503 00:24:58,581 --> 00:25:00,081 (BOTH SINGING) 504 00:25:09,425 --> 00:25:11,050 (PHONE RINGING) 505 00:25:15,556 --> 00:25:17,682 - Yeah? - Good news, Eric. 506 00:25:17,766 --> 00:25:19,893 - Ed Norton liked the script? - He loved it. 507 00:25:19,977 --> 00:25:21,728 - He wants to do it. - That's great. 508 00:25:21,812 --> 00:25:24,355 Only he sees it a little bit bigger than scripted. 509 00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:26,816 He wants to see the fireman battling the blaze, 510 00:25:26,901 --> 00:25:29,819 instead ofjust sitting around the firehouse talking about it. 511 00:25:29,904 --> 00:25:31,738 That sounds like a lot bigger than a little bigger. 512 00:25:31,822 --> 00:25:33,448 He wants to make it a studio film, Eric. 513 00:25:33,532 --> 00:25:34,866 Maybe get Ridley Scott to direct it. 514 00:25:34,950 --> 00:25:37,243 And he thinks Smokejumpers is a more evocative title 515 00:25:37,328 --> 00:25:39,746 than Nine Brave Souls. You okay with that? 516 00:25:39,914 --> 00:25:42,332 - Sure. - Great. I'll let you know when I know more. 517 00:25:43,042 --> 00:25:44,167 Go back to your party. 518 00:25:50,966 --> 00:25:52,675 Yeah, Vincent Chase! 519 00:25:54,136 --> 00:25:55,261 Oh, my God. 520 00:25:56,138 --> 00:25:57,639 (ALL SINGING) 521 00:26:11,153 --> 00:26:14,364 Can you hear me, bitches? (COUGHING) 522 00:26:14,823 --> 00:26:15,990 (GROANING) 523 00:26:24,833 --> 00:26:26,584 I hope you got the money in advance. 524 00:26:30,130 --> 00:26:31,965 (SONG CONTINUES PLAYING)