1 00:00:01,200 --> 00:00:03,965 - So Lance Bass, I think, was originally the star, 2 00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:05,650 and then Justin Timberlake, like, knocked him 3 00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:07,205 off his throne. 4 00:00:07,360 --> 00:00:08,486 - Yeah, and he went and started the Backstreet Boys. 5 00:00:08,600 --> 00:00:10,045 - No. - Mm-hmm. 6 00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:12,128 - Well, then who's in the Backstreet Boys? 7 00:00:12,280 --> 00:00:13,805 - Josh. 8 00:00:13,920 --> 00:00:15,206 - Joshua? Yeah, Josh was the star of the Backstreet Boys. 9 00:00:15,320 --> 00:00:16,765 - Dude, and he's still doing it. 10 00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:19,565 - Yeah, he's a talent. - He had a single-- 11 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:20,966 - Homegirl's passed out. 12 00:00:21,120 --> 00:00:23,248 - Man, I would not be sleeping on the job 13 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:24,930 if I was the self-proclaimed office prankster. 14 00:00:25,040 --> 00:00:26,485 - Seriously. 15 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:27,931 - Especially a week after she put fluffernutter 16 00:00:28,040 --> 00:00:29,849 on my friggin' headset. 17 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:31,371 - [chuckles] - And spermicide on my doughnut. 18 00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:33,448 - Those were funny, dude. 19 00:00:33,560 --> 00:00:35,403 - It's payback time. 20 00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:38,603 - ♪ I'm gonna be the biggest monkey ♪ 21 00:00:38,720 --> 00:00:42,008 ♪ I'm gonna be the biggest monkey of 'em all ♪ 22 00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:44,726 ♪ All your biting and your barking will be in vain ♪ 23 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:48,242 ♪ You see me standing right on top of the food chain ♪ 24 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:51,927 - [laughs] - [slurps] 25 00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:53,849 - ♪ I'm gonna make the other monkeys fear me ♪ 26 00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:56,361 - [imitating Homegirl] "Four inches is fine!" 27 00:00:56,480 --> 00:00:58,721 - ♪ Be the biggest monkey ♪ 28 00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:01,491 ♪ I'm gonna be the biggest monkey of 'em all now ♪ 29 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:03,443 [Click] 30 00:01:03,560 --> 00:01:05,528 - What are you idiots doing? 31 00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:07,927 - I don't have a pulse. 32 00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:09,929 [radio chatter] 33 00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:13,840 [defibrillator powers on and zaps] 34 00:01:13,960 --> 00:01:17,043 - Uh...honeybun? 35 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:20,050 [beatboxing] 36 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:21,286 $5' 37 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:23,801 - ♪ I'm fresh ♪ 38 00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:26,002 - ♪ You gotta, you gotta, you gotta ♪ 39 00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:29,124 - ♪ Gotta be fresh ♪ 40 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:32,006 - Quit hogging it. - Yeah, come on. 41 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:34,805 Now just be sure you get all the ghost off of there, all right? 42 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:36,365 - All the ectoplasm. - Ugh. 43 00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:38,847 - Oh, gross, dead people. - This is weird. 44 00:01:38,960 --> 00:01:40,610 I mean, Homegirl's dead. 45 00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:42,643 Office prankster--gone. 46 00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:46,560 - Well, now that she's dead, I can let you guys know... 47 00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:48,330 that I'm the main office prankster. 48 00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:50,807 - Okay. - Yeah, no, I did fluffernutter, 49 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:53,440 spermicide, that's my shib. 50 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:54,846 I'm the main office prankster. 51 00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:56,200 I'm glad I got this off my chest. 52 00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:57,606 - I cannot believe 53 00:01:57,760 --> 00:01:59,444 you would pull that spermicide prank on me. 54 00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:03,042 - I can't believe you knew exactly what spermicide 55 00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:04,685 tasted like. Ugh! 56 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:06,484 - It was a wild guess. 57 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:08,967 - Have you been deep-throating condoms, just to see if you can? 58 00:02:09,080 --> 00:02:11,048 - Mm-mm. - Okay, well, I just think 59 00:02:11,160 --> 00:02:14,448 maybe the best thing to do is remember all the great times 60 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:16,050 that we had with Homegirl. - Right. 61 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:20,722 - That's probably the-- - Mmm... 62 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:22,490 - We never really talked. 63 00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:24,204 - Mm, yeah, I don't really remember any amazing times 64 00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:25,765 that I had with Homegirl. 65 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:27,370 - Yeah, me neither. - Except for that time when 66 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:29,403 we were just tea-bagging her eye socket a second ago. 67 00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:31,249 [all laughing] - That was great. 68 00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:33,362 - But then she ruined it by being a dead lady. 69 00:02:33,480 --> 00:02:35,005 - Yeah. - Yeah, she did. 70 00:02:35,120 --> 00:02:36,690 - That said, still butthurt. 71 00:02:36,840 --> 00:02:38,490 - I'm butthurt, man. - You know the one thing 72 00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:41,080 easing my butthurtedness is the fact that 73 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:42,804 we're probably gonna have work off tomorrow. 74 00:02:42,920 --> 00:02:44,251 - Whoa, I didn't even think of that. 75 00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:45,725 - Yes, of course we are! - That's awesome. 76 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:47,365 - Of course we are, it's a death day. 77 00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:49,010 It's like a snow day, but it's a death day. 78 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:50,485 - And check this out. I got a Swedish pen pal in town. 79 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:51,726 She's in Vegas right now. 80 00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:53,001 Wants to come to Hollywood, 81 00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:54,360 which is where I told her we live. 82 00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:56,050 - We don't. - Smart, very smart. 83 00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:57,889 - I know. I can't say Rancho Cucamonga. 84 00:02:58,000 --> 00:02:59,525 They don't know what that is. They're from Sweden! 85 00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:00,926 They're not gonna know. 86 00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:02,201 - Yeah, Swedes don't know anything. 87 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:03,970 - Yeah, you gotta say Hollywood. 88 00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:05,690 - Hey, Ders, is this the same chick that you told us about 89 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:07,609 where you squeezed her boob through her sleeve 90 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:08,881 while watching Gladiator in your friend's basement? 91 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,610 - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. 92 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:12,324 And it was a long sleeve shirt, so where's my dap at? 93 00:03:12,440 --> 00:03:13,646 - Dude, I need some sleeve boob myself. 94 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:15,364 I'm taking the other chick, too, 95 00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,086 and I apologize in advance for marrying her. 96 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:19,850 Whoo, yes. - Nice. Quick on the draw. 97 00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:21,246 Dap on the dibster man. 98 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:23,203 - I don't know about dap, actually. 99 00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:25,129 - But I'm gonna have to say no, because there's only one pure 100 00:03:25,240 --> 00:03:28,050 fair way to decide who's gonna be my bro-pilot on this one. 101 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:33,645 - 87. 87! 102 00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:36,206 -87? - I'm maxed out. 87. 103 00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:38,408 - Okay. Okay, that's--that's a pretty high bar, Blazer. 104 00:03:38,520 --> 00:03:41,046 So that means you only have to put on... 105 00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:43,049 none, because I'm choosing you. 106 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,123 - No. No! - You--you serious? 107 00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:46,480 - Yeah, I'm serious, dude. You look like a professional 108 00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:47,965 skating celebrity. 109 00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:49,485 The Swedish chicks will dig that. 110 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:51,887 - Yeah, man! Pro skater, I can do that. 111 00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:53,724 No problem. Blaker has a death wish. 112 00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:55,569 - No, no, no. Adam has a death wish. 113 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:57,125 - Well, you should have thought about that when you were putting 114 00:03:57,240 --> 00:03:59,607 spermicide on my French cruller. 115 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:02,161 O'Ders rules! 116 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:04,567 Blake, let's dap out of here. 117 00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:07,849 ' No! Oh! 118 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:09,644 That hurts so bad. 119 00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:11,125 - Hey, Alice? 120 00:04:11,240 --> 00:04:13,288 Can we, um, have a minute? 121 00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:15,681 - Fine. 122 00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:19,600 - Uh, Homegirl's death, it-- 123 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:21,165 it's got us, uh-- 124 00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:22,970 We're--we're pretty butthurt about it. 125 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:24,730 - Really? - You know, we want to come in 126 00:04:24,840 --> 00:04:25,966 tomorrow and just 127 00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,606 pluck away and do our duty here, 128 00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:31,769 but I don't know if I'm gonna sound okay 129 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:33,803 [high pitched] on the phones, because I can't-- 130 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,167 - You see, he just needs a day to grieve... 131 00:04:36,280 --> 00:04:37,611 - Yeah. - Have a good cry. 132 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:39,165 We all just need a-- probably a good cry. 133 00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:40,850 Just a day. One day. - You were gonna cry too, 134 00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:42,200 though, right? - No, I'm--I'm probably gonna-- 135 00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:43,810 - See, he's crying too now. 136 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:48,084 - Yeah, okay, so if you guys were actually up-- 137 00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:50,009 - Alice! Hey, what's up? I--it's awesome to, eh, 138 00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:52,043 run into you here. I was just out there, 139 00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:53,969 individually talking with everyone, 140 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,004 and we all agree the best way to commemorate Homegirl's life 141 00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:59,043 and remember her is by immediately forgetting her, 142 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:00,571 and just working all day tomorrow. 143 00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:02,330 - Okay, Adam, don't mess this up for me. 144 00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:03,601 You know how I am with girls. 145 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,563 I'm like a bull in a vagina shop. 146 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:06,886 - Blake, it's not my fault 147 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,764 you're not a Rico Suave dude, okay? 148 00:05:08,880 --> 00:05:10,006 - I am a Rico Suave-- - you are not a Rico Suave-- 149 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:11,844 - Okay, all right, that is enough. 150 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,247 Okay, I don't know what you guys are up to, 151 00:05:14,360 --> 00:05:16,966 and I certainly don't know what "butthurt" means. 152 00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:18,320 But guess what. 153 00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:20,761 Death happens, and it's real sad. 154 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:23,002 And we're all still coming into work tomorrow. 155 00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:24,565 - Yes! We'll ge-- 156 00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:29,009 - Should we not remember Homegirl by at least 157 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,849 having some sort of service 158 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:33,327 for friends and co-workers and out-of-town guests? 159 00:05:33,440 --> 00:05:35,568 - I don't need this. - Oh, yes. 160 00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:37,728 That would be very good. 161 00:05:37,840 --> 00:05:39,968 - Okay, fine. Tomorrow, after lunch, 162 00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:41,206 You can have a thing. 163 00:05:41,360 --> 00:05:42,771 - Thank you. - Thank you. 164 00:05:42,880 --> 00:05:44,166 - We don't need a thing. - Thank you so much. 165 00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:45,765 - This is not fair-- Alice, this is not fair! 166 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:48,247 I am having the worst day out of everyone 167 00:05:48,360 --> 00:05:51,842 in this entire office... except--except maybe Homegirl. 168 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:57,171 - We need cookies, flowers, refreshments, beer... 169 00:05:57,280 --> 00:06:00,568 - Yes. - Whiskey, oysters, for the, 170 00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:03,365 you know, uh, strobe light, and some balloons that say, 171 00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:04,925 'Welcome to Hollywood." 172 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:08,761 - Oh, oh, and a karaoke machine, and extra-large-- 173 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:10,245 extra-medium condoms. 174 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:12,488 - I'm not gonna buy those things, Blake. 175 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,210 I can swing by my house for that stuff. 176 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:16,084 - All right. - Thank you. 177 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:18,043 You're being timed. Oh, here he is, grumpy bear, 178 00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:20,322 Mr. "Salty That He Didn't Get a Date to the Dance." 179 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:22,209 - I'm not a bear. 180 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:23,805 I'm a human being. - Okay. 181 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:25,809 - I'm just excited to meet your girls. 182 00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:27,729 That should be interesting. 183 00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:33,085 [forced evil laugh] 184 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:36,323 [laughs] 185 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:39,284 [beatboxing] 186 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:43,244 [beatboxing] 187 00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:45,124 - And just some more cookies. 188 00:06:45,240 --> 00:06:46,969 By the way, good call on the danishes. 189 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:48,923 They're Swedish, but they'll probably get it. 190 00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:51,247 Man, this place is actually kind of popping. 191 00:06:51,360 --> 00:06:53,203 - Yeah. Ooh. 192 00:06:53,320 --> 00:06:56,369 ♪ But you know it ain't a party till Jillian brings the queso ♪ 193 00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:58,522 - Yeah, let's get the-- 194 00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:00,768 - Oh, speaking of the devil. - I'm not the devil. 195 00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:02,006 - Okay, just give me the bag. 196 00:07:02,120 --> 00:07:03,963 - I'm not, I'm serious. 197 00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:05,206 - She's not, she's serious, but she seriously 198 00:07:05,360 --> 00:07:06,486 brought some queso! 199 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:08,921 - Ho! Buenos nachos. 200 00:07:09,040 --> 00:07:10,610 - Should you get a little too grief-stricken upstairs, 201 00:07:10,720 --> 00:07:12,449 you can always come down here for a stiff one. 202 00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:14,927 - Those Swedish girls are gonna want a stiff one. 203 00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:16,605 [chuckles] but seriously, 204 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:19,485 whenever I'm sad, the only fixer is a mixer! 205 00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:21,284 - Yup, always saying that. Oop. [phone beeps] 206 00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:22,970 - Sex and the City stuff. - Yeah, that's cool. 207 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:24,320 - Yeah, I watched a lot over the summer. 208 00:07:24,440 --> 00:07:26,966 - Hey, Blake. It's the "goils." 209 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:29,367 - Oh, shoot! Okay, okay, okay, I'm ready. 210 00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:31,528 I got the board, I've been practicing some tricks. 211 00:07:31,680 --> 00:07:32,806 [English accent] I've got this accent 212 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:34,160 that I'm gonna try out. 213 00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:35,805 - [English accent] Oh, you sound fantastic. 214 00:07:35,920 --> 00:07:37,251 [both laughing] 215 00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:38,521 - Don't--we're not gonna do an accent. 216 00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:40,130 - Okay, no accent. - Oh, okay. 217 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:41,651 - Jillian, no one past that line. 218 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:42,966 - No one. - Except us. 219 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:44,206 - Okay. - And the babes. 220 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:46,482 - Yes. - Oh, okay. 221 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,841 Yo--no, you can't come in. 222 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:50,086 Nah, you can come in. 223 00:07:50,240 --> 00:07:51,765 - There they are! 224 00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:55,168 Hey, hey, you made it. - Welcome to California. 225 00:07:55,280 --> 00:07:57,408 - Oh, God, I haven't seen you since we were, what, 13? 226 00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:58,646 You haven't changed. 227 00:07:58,760 --> 00:08:00,364 - Eh, wha--really? 228 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:01,606 - Yeah, I mean, your sleeves are a little shorter, 229 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:03,051 which I like. 230 00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:04,924 - Woo-doo-doo-doo-doo! [all laughing] 231 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:06,451 - Remember? 232 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:08,449 - Um, so we're going into Hollywood, right? 233 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:10,005 Our flight is at 7:00. 234 00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:12,771 - Right, 7:00. So, since your flight's so soon, 235 00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,406 we were thinking we could just keep it real around here, 236 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:16,965 in Rancho Cucamonga, 237 00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:19,242 which is also known as Hollywood East. 238 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:20,885 I don't know if you knew that, but, you know, 239 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,480 if you guys want to go to the old Hollywood--blegh! 240 00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:25,329 - Oh, blah. - It stinks. It sucks. 241 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,482 This is great. Uh, we can do that later. 242 00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:29,170 Um, I doubt you'll want to, 243 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:31,482 because I got a skateboarding celebrity 244 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:33,568 right here for you. Blake Anderson... 245 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,011 [girls laugh] champion of the ramp. 246 00:08:35,160 --> 00:08:38,164 - What's up, brajettes? [all laughing] 247 00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:39,725 Very gnaw to meet you. 248 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:41,365 What do you say we ramp things up 249 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:43,767 and, uh, just kind of--oh! 250 00:08:43,880 --> 00:08:45,962 Yeah, kick-flip it inside? 251 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:47,411 - What are you doing? What are you doing? 252 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:49,568 - Oh, I'm landing these tricks, dude. 253 00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:51,842 - Okay, so, why don't we head into the office party 254 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:53,962 real quick, because Hollywood doesn't really start popping 255 00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:55,730 until like 5:30, 6:00 anyway. 256 00:08:55,840 --> 00:08:57,763 - Yeah, well, that's when David Beckham comes out. 257 00:08:57,880 --> 00:08:59,006 You know David? [all laughing] 258 00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:00,246 Uh, let me just-- - Oh. 259 00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:01,885 Sorry--it's just-- - Ooh. 260 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:05,721 - You have to get out of it, sweetheart, all right. 261 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:07,410 - I love skateboarding. - Oh, really? 262 00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:09,363 Yeah, I actually own a Wendy's with Shaun White. 263 00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:10,766 - Oh, wow. 264 00:09:10,880 --> 00:09:12,211 - All right, welcome, welcome. 265 00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:17,002 Who wants a Disaronno on the rocks? 266 00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:18,764 - What--what happened? 267 00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:25,525 - ♪ Oh, mama, this surely is a dream yeah ♪ 268 00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:27,961 ♪ Yeah, mama this must be my ♪ 269 00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:32,244 ♪ Dream ♪ 270 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,761 - Whoo. [sporadic applause] 271 00:09:34,880 --> 00:09:36,484 - Thank you. Thank you! 272 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:40,321 This goes out to Homegirl's two favorite things-- 273 00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:41,601 sex and candy. 274 00:09:41,720 --> 00:09:43,245 Let's give it up. 275 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:45,124 Let's give it up. We'll miss you, Homegirl! 276 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,527 [applause] You're an angel. 277 00:09:47,640 --> 00:09:49,768 - She was a strong woman. 278 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:52,247 She could lift anything, it was nuts. 279 00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:54,004 - It was nuts. 280 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:55,724 Ders, Blake? 281 00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:58,286 Do you have anything to say about our fallen comrade? 282 00:09:58,400 --> 00:09:59,686 - Mm-mm. 283 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,131 - She was nice. 284 00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:03,607 - Nice? Nice! 285 00:10:03,720 --> 00:10:05,529 She was a lot more than nice. 286 00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:11,044 She was a-- a king of the hill. 287 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:13,686 She was a legend... of the fall. 288 00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:18,209 She was Malcolm, when Malcolm was in the middle. 289 00:10:18,320 --> 00:10:20,561 She was an ultimate fighter till the end. 290 00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:22,722 - I never told her I loved her. 291 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:25,127 I got her pregnant, but she didn't want to have it. 292 00:10:25,240 --> 00:10:27,288 And--and now there's nothing left of her. 293 00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:28,811 - Uh-oh. 294 00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:30,809 - Ah, it's okay, bud. That's okay. 295 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:32,570 That stuff you just keep to yourself 296 00:10:32,680 --> 00:10:35,570 and never tell a soul, all right? 297 00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:37,409 - Someone died in your office, 298 00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:40,569 and you invited us to party here? 299 00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:44,810 - Yeah, because, uh, in America, we like to celebrate 300 00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:47,241 life after death, so-- 301 00:10:47,360 --> 00:10:52,526 - So we should probably just go take some Jager bombs at the bar 302 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:54,165 in memorandum of Homegirl. 303 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:56,328 - Uh-huh, and then we can get back to the VIP lounge. 304 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:57,566 Come on over here. 305 00:10:57,680 --> 00:10:59,330 - You guys able to sleep yet? 306 00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:01,442 Every time I close my eyes I see her face. 307 00:11:01,560 --> 00:11:03,244 - Mm-mm. - I tried counting sheep, 308 00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:05,931 but they just turned into wooly little Homegirls. 309 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:07,769 And they're neighing, 310 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:10,565 “Naa-v er forget. Naa-V er forgefl.! 311 00:11:10,680 --> 00:11:12,409 Naa--" - Jillian, just a bucket 312 00:11:12,520 --> 00:11:14,124 of beers and some whiskey? - All right. 313 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:15,969 - Sorry about that. - Excuse me. 314 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:17,411 I hope you girls weren't planning on leaving, 315 00:11:17,520 --> 00:11:18,806 'cause you guys are my best friends. 316 00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:21,764 - Uh.- - By the way, my name's Adam. 317 00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:23,689 You guys are like a shining light. 318 00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:25,802 - I'm so sorry to hear about-- 319 00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:27,684 - Homegirl. 320 00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:31,088 Yeah, I'm pretty butthurt about it. 321 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:32,725 - How did she die? 322 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:34,808 - [sighs] - Well, she went peacefully, 323 00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:36,485 thank God. 324 00:11:36,600 --> 00:11:38,250 But I was there the entire time, 325 00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:41,762 and the last thing she said before she passed was, 326 00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:45,168 "Adam, you're the best, and I love you the most 327 00:11:45,280 --> 00:11:46,770 out of everyone." 328 00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:48,325 And then she was gone. 329 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:50,010 Brain tumor. 330 00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:52,122 The doctor said it was the size of a P'zone. 331 00:11:52,240 --> 00:11:54,083 - Oh, wow. 332 00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:56,771 My grandmother died from a brain tumor about a year ago. 333 00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:59,008 - Really? - It was hard at first, 334 00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:02,806 but it gets better. 335 00:12:02,920 --> 00:12:05,890 - I know I don't know you two very well, 336 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:08,924 but it would help me out a lot 337 00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:13,404 if you guys could stick around, just a little bit. 338 00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:14,851 - Yeah. 339 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:16,525 We can do that. 340 00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:19,166 - Thank you. Thank you, I'm so emotional right now. 341 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,886 I'm so--oh-ho-ho-ho-- 342 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,606 [exaggerated sobbing] 343 00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:27,843 [beatboxing] 344 00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:31,765 [beatboxing] 345 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:34,611 - You know, I probably shouldn't use alcohol to drown the pain, 346 00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:38,406 but Homegirl loved Century Club. 347 00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:40,329 100 shots, 100 minutes. 348 00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:41,885 I'm in. Let's do this. 349 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,286 - Ahem! - Let's do this. 350 00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:44,640 It's an American thing. 351 00:12:44,760 --> 00:12:45,807 - Um, if I could have your attention, 352 00:12:45,920 --> 00:12:47,968 I just wanted to let you know. 353 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:51,169 Blake and I have channeled oursadness 354 00:12:51,280 --> 00:12:54,568 regarding Homegirl's passing into a charity 355 00:12:54,680 --> 00:12:56,045 in Homegirl's name. 356 00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:59,687 - Homegirl's home for girls without homes. 357 00:12:59,840 --> 00:13:03,367 - Well I've also made an organization 358 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:06,165 that's gonna raise money to cure brain tumorism. 359 00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:07,805 It's called rollerblading across the Americas. 360 00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:09,490 - Oh, yeah? North and South? 361 00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:12,371 - And east and west, if it'll find a goddamn cure! 362 00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:15,000 - Okay, well all the money in the world isn't gonna 363 00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:17,168 do anything to bring Homegirl back. 364 00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:19,009 The only way to keep Homegirl alive 365 00:13:19,120 --> 00:13:20,963 is to name stuff after her, 366 00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:22,570 like charities... - Uh-huh. 367 00:13:22,680 --> 00:13:24,170 - Or skateboard tricks. 368 00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:25,446 - Huh? - Blake. 369 00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:28,530 - Uh... - Show 'em the Homegirl. 370 00:13:34,840 --> 00:13:36,126 - Homegirl! 371 00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:38,004 - Whoa. 372 00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:39,246 - You didn't show her much respect by 373 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:40,885 not using her real name. 374 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,650 - Yeah, well, obviously it's--it's that then. 375 00:13:42,800 --> 00:13:44,450 - It's what then? - It's her name--if that was-- 376 00:13:44,560 --> 00:13:46,483 - And what's her name, Bets'? 377 00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:47,931 She had a name, dude. 378 00:13:48,040 --> 00:13:51,283 And her name... 379 00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:53,050 was Roberta Paulson. 380 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:57,529 Her name was Roberta Paulson. 381 00:13:57,640 --> 00:14:00,769 All: Her name was Roberta Paulson! 382 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:02,041 - Guys-- 383 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:04,891 all: Her name is Roberta Paulson! 384 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,365 How do you say seance in Swedish? 385 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:08,005 - Uh... [speaks in Swedish] 386 00:14:08,120 --> 00:14:10,771 - Then let us have a... [speaks Swedish incorrectly] 387 00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:12,006 - Alice, you've got to shut it down now. 388 00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:13,650 - What? 389 00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:15,888 - Homegirl's wake. Shut it down, now. Please. 390 00:14:16,040 --> 00:14:17,769 - Nobody's butthurt. Not anymore. 391 00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:19,405 We're all, uh, we're all butthealed. 392 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:21,249 - Yup, our butts are the picture of perfect health. 393 00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,522 - Praise--praise the butt-god. - The wake has to keep going. 394 00:14:23,640 --> 00:14:26,166 Her kids are on the way over with some kind of video will. 395 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:27,964 - Whoa. Whose video will? 396 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:29,764 Is it like a cool little droid dude? 397 00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:33,009 - No, it's like a video with last words or wishes. 398 00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:34,724 - Wait, no, but Adam's up there going out of control 399 00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:36,524 on the mic device. He was singing a song, 400 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:38,085 and, like, I don't know what he's gonna do next. 401 00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:41,249 - Ders. No, video will, that's a great idea. 402 00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:43,482 You know, it would've been cool if it was a robot. 403 00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:44,931 Video will? 404 00:14:45,040 --> 00:14:46,280 [robot voice] Video will. What's up? 405 00:14:46,400 --> 00:14:48,767 - Mr. Nate Dogg. Are you there? 406 00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:52,282 I just have but one question for you, Mr. Nate Dogg. 407 00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:54,402 How do I make it into heaven? 408 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:57,683 [groaning, grunting] Oh. Oh! 409 00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:04,960 Ay yay- AV Ya)!-. 410 00:15:05,080 --> 00:15:10,211 Smoke weed every day. 411 00:15:10,320 --> 00:15:12,527 Luckily, I do, so I guess I'm going to heaven. 412 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:15,729 I feel now would be a good time to contact Homegirl. 413 00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:17,683 - Can we leave? I want to see Ben Affleck 414 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:18,926 at the wax museum. 415 00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:21,281 - You know what? Screw Homegirl. 416 00:15:21,440 --> 00:15:24,922 It's time to contact your dead grandmother. 417 00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:26,724 - Guys, again, sorry to interrupt, 418 00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:29,650 but I'm pretty sure I have something way more important 419 00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:31,489 than whatever Adam's convinced you he's doing. 420 00:15:31,600 --> 00:15:32,931 - Oh, is it cartoons? 421 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:34,883 Oh, thank God. All I need is a good cartoon 422 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:36,365 to take my mind off of things. 423 00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:38,482 Is it Doug? Is it Hey, Arnold? 424 00:15:38,600 --> 00:15:40,284 - No, no, Jillian, it's not cartoons, okay? 425 00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:42,767 If it was, it'd be Beetlejuice. - Makes sense. 426 00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:45,844 - But it's something, uh, a little more meaningful. 427 00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:47,849 It's Homegirl's video will. 428 00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:51,009 Here we go. - Hey, y'all. It's me. 429 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,646 If you're watching this, I'm a goner. 430 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:55,808 But don't let that get you down. 431 00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:58,207 - I think those are wise words. Let's liven things up. 432 00:15:58,320 --> 00:15:59,685 Do you guys wanna top off your drinks? 433 00:15:59,800 --> 00:16:01,086 - Yeah, because the longer you're sad, 434 00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:04,682 the longer I'm gonna spend in hell. 435 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,849 So don't be so darn butthurt. 436 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:10,611 - Mm. - Amen to that, girl. 437 00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:12,324 - I'd like to say a special thank you to all 438 00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:14,568 you at TelAmeriCorp, 439 00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:18,685 but mostly to Anders and Blake. 440 00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:20,040 - Oh, did you hear that? 441 00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:21,650 - They're just two gentlemen, 442 00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:24,001 and not only are their hearts tender, 443 00:16:24,120 --> 00:16:26,521 but I would guess to say that 444 00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:28,927 their penises are pretty tender too. 445 00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:30,246 - Whoa, did you hear that? - So you might want to put 446 00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:31,930 'em in your mouth and find out. 447 00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:34,247 I'd be having babies with 'em-- - Aha! 448 00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:36,328 I thought I knew it wasn't really her for a second. 449 00:16:36,440 --> 00:16:37,851 - Just have sex with Blake and Anders, 450 00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:39,121 not Adam, 'cause he's sad and stupid! 451 00:16:39,240 --> 00:16:40,651 - No! No, be sad. 452 00:16:40,760 --> 00:16:42,364 Be sad and butthurt. - No. 453 00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:44,921 - Be butthurt and sad. - Be happy and sex with Blake. 454 00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:47,361 - He's just saying have sex with--or, she-- 455 00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:50,609 [overlapping arguing] 456 00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:52,165 - You see what he was doing? 457 00:16:52,320 --> 00:16:53,810 He was face-timing. This is a lie. 458 00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:55,331 - No, no. - This is a lie. 459 00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:56,726 - No, no, no, no, Adam, don't do this. 460 00:16:56,840 --> 00:17:00,003 I need this! I just wanna screw these two 461 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:02,128 Swedes together like IKEA furniture! 462 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:06,450 - No, no, you declared war on me when you didn't 463 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:10,042 draft me to be part of your Hollywood double date, okay? 464 00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:11,605 So quit trying to make everybody happy. 465 00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:13,529 So you can get physical with those sexy foreigners. 466 00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:14,801 But you know what? 467 00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:17,207 Sadness is the real key to evoke 468 00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:20,369 passion and sexuality. - No, happiness! 469 00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:21,720 - It's happiness. - It's sadness! 470 00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:23,410 ♪ I smell sex and candy yeah ♪ 471 00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:26,609 - Oh, no, no, no, you don't. 472 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,085 - Blake! Cut him off! 473 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:29,281 - ♪ Who's that lounging in my chair ♪ 474 00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:30,646 - No, don't listen. Aha! 475 00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:32,171 - Everyone-- - I'll do it a cappella. 476 00:17:32,320 --> 00:17:34,721 ♪ Who's that drowning deviant stares ♪ 477 00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:36,490 - Blake, you need to destroy his sound system. 478 00:17:36,600 --> 00:17:38,329 - ♪ Mama this surely is a dream ♪ 479 00:17:38,440 --> 00:17:39,566 - Adam! He's strong-- help me, Ders. 480 00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:41,170 - Dudes! Dudes! 481 00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:44,011 - You guys! 482 00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:49,490 This is, um--uh, Homegirl's son Craig and daughter Marlene. 483 00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:54,604 [beatboxing] 484 00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:58,127 [beatboxing] 485 00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:01,483 - God, I love your mom. 486 00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:03,165 Loved, 'cause she's dead. 487 00:18:03,280 --> 00:18:05,362 'Cause, I'm kind of the main office prankster. 488 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:07,363 Second, of course, to Roberta. 489 00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:09,602 - Who's Roberta? 490 00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:12,485 - Your...mom. Your mom, Roberta. 491 00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:14,568 - Our mothers name was Kristy Howard-Clark. 492 00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:17,047 All: What? [muttering] 493 00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:18,486 - Was it? - Kristy Howard-Clark. 494 00:18:18,600 --> 00:18:20,682 - I've never heard that name before. 495 00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,849 - So you didn't really know this woman at all either'? 496 00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:26,645 - No, but, like, what is knowing, nowadays? 497 00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:28,967 - Okay, who are they-- who are you? 498 00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:30,570 - We're leaving. 499 00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:34,207 We just wanted to see the goddamn Hollywood sign, 500 00:18:34,320 --> 00:18:35,970 and you ruined our last day in America. 501 00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:38,082 - You're not gonna throw out our years of pen palling 502 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,202 back and forth over one crazy day? 503 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:42,163 - I wrote you for two years. 504 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:45,124 After middle school, you were writing with my little brother. 505 00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,641 [both speaking Swedish] 506 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,081 - For ten years I was writing to your little brother? 507 00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:53,010 Okay, that--that can't be true. I told him I loved him. 508 00:18:53,120 --> 00:18:54,610 That doesn't make me-- - It does. 509 00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:57,371 - I had you for two years. And the sleeve! 510 00:18:57,480 --> 00:18:59,482 - Unbelievable, I can't believe mom worked with such idiots. 511 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:01,204 - But she made us promise we'd show you this video 512 00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:05,530 if she ever prematurely passed away. 513 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:07,210 - Hello, everyone. 514 00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:10,767 It's me, Kristy. The main office prankster. 515 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:15,244 Thank you for all the wonderful years at TelAmeriCorp. 516 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:17,931 [burps] I cherish them, 517 00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:19,326 and I cherish you. 518 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:21,841 Jillian, you were always there to listen. 519 00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,883 - I don't think we ever spoke. 520 00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,571 - Montez, thank you for letting me borrow 521 00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:32,323 your Wayne's World DVD. Sha-wing! 522 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:34,448 And, Bill, I had the baby. She's in Phoenix. 523 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:37,006 - Phoenix! - And finally, 524 00:19:37,120 --> 00:19:39,964 Anders, Blake, and Alan-- - Alan? 525 00:19:40,080 --> 00:19:43,368 - The other office pranksters. 526 00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:46,211 I wanted to show you a painting I made for your cubicle. 527 00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:49,369 I'm so proud of it, and I hope that it brightens your day. 528 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:51,209 - She was a painter? - I don't know. 529 00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:56,281 - It's right over here. 530 00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:58,209 Psych! [all yelling, muttering] 531 00:19:58,320 --> 00:20:00,084 Can't unsee this! 532 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:04,091 I'm the main office prankster for life, you motherfuckers. 533 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:06,043 - This doesn't affect me. I've seen a lot of porno, 534 00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:08,128 this doesn't affect me. - Still got it. 535 00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:09,890 - Okay, uh, wow. - Oh. 536 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:14,562 - I-I guess the tumor had more effect than we knew, um-- 537 00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:17,126 the truth is we hadn't seen mom in three years. 538 00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:18,730 We had a Thanksgiving where she kept 539 00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:20,285 calling my dog the "N" word. 540 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:23,210 - Oh, we're just real busy. I teach, so-- 541 00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:25,402 - We understand, you know. Parents. 542 00:20:25,520 --> 00:20:27,409 Right? Everybody? 543 00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:30,649 - Yeah, yeah. Turns out your mom's actually pretty cool. 544 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:34,287 I think we're all pretty butthurt that she's dead. 545 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:38,724 - And the fact that she showed the entire office her titties 546 00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:41,451 proves that she's the co-main office prankster, 547 00:20:41,560 --> 00:20:43,050 tied with me, obviously. 548 00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,925 - Craig, can we, please? - Yeah, uh, thanks everyone. 549 00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:47,530 - You're welcome, Greg. 550 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,921 - All right, everybody get back to work, now, please. 551 00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:51,166 - Where's Homegirl? 552 00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:52,611 - Oh, Jet Set, you're next. 553 00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:56,645 - Jillian, show me your breasts. 554 00:20:56,760 --> 00:20:58,125 And that's real. 555 00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,129 - Nice. 556 00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:01,287 [snorting] 557 00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:02,526 [honks] 558 00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:07,722 - And this is for us? Or is it a trap? 559 00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,241 - No, it's not a trap, Jet Set. 560 00:21:10,360 --> 00:21:11,441 - Get it. [thud] 561 00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:15,087 - Wow, this is good. 562 00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,249 It's party time. This is for Homegirl. 563 00:21:18,360 --> 00:21:20,328 - Have someone drive you home. - Please.